April 24, 2007, - 10:34 am
By Debbie Schlussel
To all of those liberal celebs, fashion designers, and other icons of pop culture who oppose the War on Terror, I say: Well, what would you do to stop Islamic terrorism?
Finally, fashion designers have come up with a sure and definite way to stop Islamic terrorists dead in their tracks, to stop Islamic clerics from exhorting their congregants to attack the rest of us, to prevent another 3,000 Americans from being murdered in a single day:
Yup, that’s right, one fashionista outfitter–”Local Celebrity” (all the rage in Hollywood)–says, forget the bombs. Chill pills will do the trick. Gee, why didn’t the generals at CENTCOM think of that? Drop a chill pill on the mountains of Tora Bora, and buh-bye Al-Qaeda.
From USA Weekend:
Two stylish trends for spring: Shiny metals let you show your wealth, while war-themed clothing aims to send a message.
Ironically, a desire for peace drives our call to arms: Many Americans reject the war in Iraq, yet some dress in combat-inspired garb. “Such attire speaks to the ugliness of our world,” says Wendy Liebmann, president of fashion consultants WSL Strategic Retail. “We’re not protesting in the streets as we did in the 1960s and ’70s, but we want to voice our opinion.”
And so we don our glum apparel: Sequin’s gold-plated bullet charm bracelet, A. Kurtz’s “Bombs Away” cotton hoodies, Marc Ecko’s Cut & Sew parachute-and-plane-strewn jackets, Nili Lotan’s machine-gun printed silk dresses, 7 for All Mankind’s pistol-draped jeans and Local Celebrity’s T-shirt with planes dropping “chill pills” on mosques. Waiting in the wings: Psycho Bunny’s cashmere scarves dotted with AK-47 rifles, which should arrive in the fall.
If this seems like overkill, blame our new, coarser culture. Just as profanity and sexuality have lost their shock value, so have signs of rebellion, says Sass Brown, assistant fashion design professor at New York City’s Fashion Institute of Technology. “I am expecting [images of] grenades and Uzis to appear in mass-market stores,” Brown says. “After all, who bats an eyelash at skulls and crossbones? They’ve been absorbed into the culture.”
No, idiocy has been absorbed into the culture. And, unfortunately, it’s dominating. If only there was an effective “chill pill” for that.
But there isn’t.
Tags: al-Qaeda, assistant fashion design professor, Chill Pills, Debbie Schlussel, idiocy, Institute of Technology, Iraq, Kalashnikov, Marc Ecko, New York City, President, president of fashion consultants WSL Strategic Retail, Sass Brown, Tora Bora, USA Weekend, Wendy Liebmann