June 15, 2007, - 1:27 pm
By Debbie Schlussel
American Greetings has announced that the company is “coming out” with a new “ellen collection” of greeting cards, featuring the name, likeness, and “wit” (if you consider that “wit”) of comedienne and talk show host Ellen DeGeneres.
Not sure what the cards will say, but here’s my guess:
“Happy Birthday . . . and I’m Gay.”
Fortunately, the cards will not be “out” in time for Father’s Day. They arrive in drug and grocery stores on Monday. So, no, you can’t give a card–at least, this year–saying:
“Happy Father’s Day . . . . I’m Gay.”
“Dear Butch Mommy #2: Happy Father’s Day.”
I predict this line of cards to be as successful as another gay-oriented product: the WNBA. Except that Ellen cards won’t be put on artificial, PC life-support for 11 years.
Think about it. Who the heck would want to give an Ellen DeGeneres card to anyone?
“Not that there’s anything wrong with that. . . .”
Tags: Butch Mommy, Debbie Schlussel, Ellen DeGeneres, Ellen DeGeneres Greeting Cards By, Ellen Greeting Card, Father's Day, talk-show host