July 27, 2007, - 12:35 pm
By Debbie Schlussel
As an avid fan of TV’s “The Simpsons,” I was really looking forward to “The Simpsons Movie.” What a letdown.
They spent three years on this? Hard to believe, since it’s little more than an average–no, below average–episode of what you see on TV every Sunday Night. The only difference is that instead of the usual 1/2 hour, it’s 1 hour and 27 minutes (including the extremely long closing credits that have some animated Simpson’s content inserted in them, so you have to stay to see it).
I gotta give FOX credit, though, because they found a way to make you go somewhere and pay $10 a pop to see what you get for free, plus commercial breaks, every Sunday and most nights in re-runs on a myriad of TV stations.
The plot: Lake Springfield has become too polluted, so new laws are made to clean it up and stop dumping. But Homer violates them by putting a giant silo of pig-poop from his new pet pig into the river. So President Schwarzenegger allows EPA Chief Russ Cargill to quarantine Springfield under a giant plastic dome. Yawn.
The episode that pretends to be a feature-length film is relatively dull compared to the best Simpson episodes and doesn’t even hold water with the average ones. There was barely any scenes with my favorite characters, Mr. Burns (a/k/a Montgomery Burns), Smithers, and Apu. They barely existed at all in this one. The movie was all Lisa. Lisa, Lisa, Lisa, the least thrilling character in the whole show.
Was there anything different about the movie? Well, for one, you see Bart Simpson naked, yup, the semi-anatomically correct full monty. Funny? Yes. Necessary? No. (You need your little kid to see Bart Simpson’s animated penis?) And the opening “Itchy & Scratchy” film within a film was hilarious, complete with a Hillary Clinton cameo. In my view, that was the best part of the movie and it was all downhill from there.
Other than that, while the movie was funny and had some good laughs, it was really no better–and not even really on par with–your average Simpson’s episode.
As a movie-goer who hates the horrendously-long movies we get these days, I do applaud the short length, but it actually seemed a little long, given the 1/2 hour we’re used to. That’s the perfet length, which regularly comes to us at the perfect price, complete with bathroom breaks.
Bottom line: The movie was fine, but not outstanding or even above average. It simply doesn’t give you a reason to shell out $10 for what you can get for free in the comfort of your own home.
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Tags: Bart Simpson, chief, Clinton, Environmental Protection Agency, Itchy & Scratchy, Lake Springfield, President, Russ Cargill, Schwarzenegger, The Simpsons, The Simpsons Movie, USD