October 2, 2007, - 2:20 pm

Attention, NFL Groupies/Pizza Delivery Guy: Lion Roy Williams Ain’t Yo’ Man

By Debbie Schlussel
If you’re one of the NFL groupies who will do anything for a “date” (euphemism) with a pro football player, if Roy Williams is your guy, don’t expect a fancy dinner before the main act.
And if you’re a pizza delivery man, you might want to skip over Roy Williams residence, as well.
The guy is cheap–VEEERY cheap!:

roywilliams.jpg

Roy Williams: Most Frugal NFL Player?

On being cheap:
I am cheap, I’m a cheap date. Get you some McDonalds, with some cheese on it and I’m just really cheap, man. I’m very low key, I like to stay home. I like to go bowling on Monday nights and I go to the casino every once and awhile. Other than that, you won’t see Mr. Williams out at all. . . .
You do tip the pizza guy?
There’s no such thing as a tip. But I am really polite and I say ‘Thank you sir.’ . . . The pizza man knows, when he comes to my address, he’s coming for free.
If you’re on a date and she wants to go to a nice place, what do you do?
I might just take her to the casino and get her a free buffet. If I did take a date out to a nice place, I’d take her to a nice place, like a Red Lobster or something. It wouldn’t be Morton’s or nothing like that.

And they say Jews are cheap. Attention, anti-Semites, you might want to change your endearing “Jewed me down” phrase to “Royed me down”. “Stop being so Royish.”
Hmmm . . . Maybe he’ll actually be one of the pro athletes who doesn’t spend his millions into bankruptcy.

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12 Responses

What a jerk. Many pro athletes are like this. I valeted at a country club during college near where I grew up in suburban Cleveland. At one time, I worked a Cleveland Cavs outing, where many players, coaching staff came out. In addition to being jerks, they were notoriously cheap. Even the $100 million man Lebron James didn’t tip us. They expected the world from us, but paid us less than the average member who was not nearly as wealthy. In fact, even the average joes who would play on days the club was open for non-member play would tip better.
I think it has to do with the fact these people are used to having their ass kissed for being super athletes. They have had their asses kissed by groupie kids and teachers during grade and high school, during college, and now during the pros. Everyone wants a piece of them, and that feeds an ego like no other. I also delivered pizzas in college, and if I got an order from williams, would be sure to hock a nice loogie in his pizza as well as be sure to turf his lawn on the way out of the driveway. What an ass.

JasonBourne81 on October 2, 2007 at 2:36 pm

Addendum
The sense of entitlement many of these pro athletes have is also reminiscent of how detached from the real world they are. For example, they fail to realize that many kids working these jobs aren’t even paid full minimum due to their dependence on tips. Again, what an ass. Hopefully someone cultures bacteria on cheese and reserves it just for him. Seeing old sparky choking his guts out with salmonela poisoning would be just about the funniest thing that could happen.

JasonBourne81 on October 2, 2007 at 2:48 pm

Being a American of Scottish descent can I request that the term “Scot Free” be added? “Roy Free” works for me….

MarySJ on October 2, 2007 at 3:08 pm

What’s the difference between a canoe and Roy Williams?
A canoe tips.

Norman Blitzer on October 2, 2007 at 3:21 pm

I understand the need to avoid going the way of Mike Tyson, who’s estimated $300 million fortune is gone, but this is ridiculous. Athletes like Roy Williams have forgotten what it’s like to be poor.

richardzowie on October 2, 2007 at 3:35 pm

“Real Jews don’t buy retail”;but- us cheap muthas tip.

jaywilton on October 2, 2007 at 3:58 pm

No doubt he’s tight when it comes to helping youth or United Way organizations too. It’s all in the attitude; in his twisted mind he thinks that because he had to work hard, he’s entitled to it all and doesn’t have to share with anyone else. Besides, he’s probably saving up for his defense fund when his cocky ass gets caught pulling a Michael Vick or some other dumbass stunt.

1shot1kill on October 2, 2007 at 6:15 pm

Whoa, whoa, slow down with the hate there. Sure the failure to tip the delivery boy is going a bit far, but being the parent of an athlete I’m constantly having to lecture ‘Put the signing bonus into DEEP savings. The big money will last only as long as your knees.’ and the poor kid already thinks women are more interested in the bank account than the person. This guy is exagerating, but it’s most likely a sefety mechanism to fend off the hangers on – and rightly so.

dm60462 on October 2, 2007 at 6:33 pm

Entertaining post, but no surprise. I used to help the Spurs load their belongings into and off of their plane when they went on, and came back from, away games. Not one in a full season ever tipped.
On a side not, coming from a town that doesn’t have a lot of Jewish representation, I have to admit to being completely ignorant for a long time, and used the phrase “jew’d me down” before I ever realized it was a racial expression.

CaptShady on October 3, 2007 at 1:11 am

This comes as no surpries, and not just because he’s a rich ATHLETE. When I delivered pizzas in high school and college the “new guys” always got to deliver to the rich neighborhoods and the veterans would head to the working class neighborhoods.

Blayne on October 3, 2007 at 8:08 am

Roy Williams is my new hero!
This tipping thing needs to go. It’s gotten ridiculous, everyone and their mother wants a tip these days. You go to Subway and they have a tip jar.
No, no, no, I am a very generous tipper. But, I think this is just a relic that needs to end. People need to start paying a decent wage, and if people don’t want to work for that, get another job.
I think it’s great to see an athlete who knows the value of a dollar and who is willing to speak up against the tipping tyranny.
Thank you, Roy Williams.

Jeff_W on October 3, 2007 at 8:47 am

As a recovering sports fan, it is truly difficult for me to understand why I cared about all this (and wagered about it) for so many years.
What an incredible waste of time and money.

Red Ryder on October 3, 2007 at 9:41 am

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