June 4, 2010, - 5:07 pm
Ironically, one of the relatively better (with the operative term being, “relatively”) new movies at the theater, this weekend, was the one the studios didn’t screen for critics (but I went to the late show to review it for you). I did not screen “Marmaduke.”
* “Splice“: I liked and hated this. It’s possibly one of the creepiest movies I’ve seen in a long, long time. It is part science fiction, part real-life, part horror flick, part crazy love triangle that becomes a weird love “square.”
The first half of the movie was interesting, while I had no use for the second half which is absurd–humans having sex with weird beings, the beings raping humans, etc. That was utter Hollywood garbage. But I liked the first half because it shows the dangers–the horrors!–of what can go wrong when genes of different species are spliced and beings are created. It’s “Brave New World” on screen. And it’s frightening. The movie makes a clear statement about that. But, then, it goes haywire and the movie descends into the typical, warped Hollywood baloney. I also didn’t like the vilification of “big business” and the typical “evil drug company.
The story: a male (Adrien Brody) and female (Sarah Polley) couple live together and also run a gene splicing research lab owned by a giant drug company. They are splice genes from various animals to make new beings from which they can harvest DNA and other substances, in a quest to cure cancer and other diseases. But the woman begins violating the rules and including human DNA. The guy reluctantly goes along, and soon a new being is formed and born. The woman–who refuses to have a child–forms maternal feelings for the being. The man keeps realizing what a mistake it was to play G-d. Eventually, they both learn that “Brave New World” is a big moral and physical disaster. But it is too late.
Sex and rape scenes with aliens? Uh, no thanks. That’s in the second half when the movie was a mess.
ONE REAGAN (for showing the disastrous effects of gene splicing and Brave New World “science” without limits)
Watch the trailer . . .
* “Killers“: This was not screened for critics, but I went to the Midnight show, last night, so I could give you my review. And it wasn’t that bad. It wasn’t great. But it was mildly entertaining and I liked it better than a lot of movies I did screen. And that’s saying a lot, since it stars two people I don’t care for . . . at all: Demi Moore’s teen-age son, Ashton Kutcher Willis-Moore, and Katherine Heigl.
Heigl plays a recently dumped plain Jane who goes to France on vacation, where she meets Kutcher, a US-government agent who kills bad guys. He’s grown tired of the job and wants to settle down. She has no idea that this is what he does for a living. They get married, and three years later, his past catches up to him. Lots of guns, killing, and action. But not bloody. Predictable, but not boring, even if it is, at times, cheesy, silly, or both.
Watch the trailer . . .
* “Get Him to the Greek“: This began as a very entertaining and hilarious, if raunchy, movie and a great parody of the self-importance of rock stars and record company execs. But it quickly degraded into a vile, vulgar absurdity with a cheesy, predictable ending. So, while I liked about the first 20 minutes of it, after that, it was downhill. And I like star Jonah Hill (real name: Jonah Hill Feldstein). On the other hand, it also stars the obnoxious Russell Brand. Yup, the same guy who (in real life) came to work dressed as Osama Bin Laden, the day after 9/11. Scumbag.
Hill plays a junior record company executive in Los Angeles. His boss is Sean “Diddy” Combs. The record company is losing money and Combs says he needs to “keep [his] six Black kids in Air Jordans.” Hill comes up with the idea to have a ten year reunion concert at “The Greek,” a concert venue for a has-been rock star who ruined his career by making a video about starving African children. Hill’s job is to get the rock star, Aldous Snow–an immature, indulgent, irresponsible jerk–to the concert venue (and other stops along the way). Plus, Hill’s relationship with his girlfriend is in trouble. Snow is a character who first appeared in the equally execrable “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” (read my review).
There’s a lot of drinking, partying, and sex with strangers a la “Hangover,” which this movie resembles. But while it was initially hilarious, it ended up being just vile and disgusting. Menage a trois sex scenes, and a guy who will put a rock star’s drugs up his butt to avoid airport security and keep his job are among the many disgusting, uncomfortable, warped scenes in this filthy flick. You don’t have to be a prude to hate this. Utter crap made for teen and 20-something slacker boys.
FOUR MARXES PLUS A BIN LADEN
Watch the trailer . . .
Tags: Adrien Brody, Aldous Snow, Ashton Kutcher, bin Laden, Get Him to the Greek, Jonah Hill, Jonah Hill Feldstein, Katherine Heigl, Killers, Movie Reviews, Russell Brand, Splice