October 31, 2006, - 9:19 am
By Debbie Schlussel
It’s Halloween, but Glenda the good witch is nowhere in sight. Instead, we have lots of wicked witches and warlocks atop Homeland Security and its sub-agencies dressing up as law enforcement. And treating us to a lot of trickery about the job they’re actually doing. All the while, the illegal alien ghouls and goblins roam into our borders.
First, there’s Julie L. Myers a/k/a The ICE Princess, head of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). She’s costumed herself up as a lot of things. But in reality, she’s accomplished little in her almost 10 months on the job. She and her well-paid PR staff put together a “fact” sheet on “her” accomplishments.
But, as one veteran, high-ranking former ICE agent said:
If they’re doing that well, then why are the estimates of illegal aliens in the U.S. reaching the 20 million mark? And, they “ended catch and release”? Oh, please…
Exactly. That’s one of the claimed accomplishments of The ICE Princess. But it’s a lie. “Catch and release”–the capture (and, sometimes, arrest) and release of illegal aliens back into the abyss–is continuing, ICE and Border Patrol agents tell us.
We have a hunch that the show arrests will continue, just until the elections, next week. Don’t be surprised if we see increased ICE raids on workplaces this week, just in time to make cable news and the papers before Tuesday’s elections.
Back to the “fact” sheet. We especially loved The ICE Princess’ claimed achievement of “Promoting Integrity Awareness.” Puh-leeze. Maybe that means, “We’re Aware of Integrity, but we ain’t gonna have any.” She just allowed a top agent who exposed himself to a teenager to retire with full pay and pension. And she still hasn’t done anything to Jennifer Sedgebeer, an agent who with her cop boyfriend, handcuffed a woman to a hot tub for refusing to perform sex acts on them.
And then there’s The ICE Princess’ recent promotion of ICE’s own George Costanza (only worse), John Torres, to the permanent position as head of ICE’s Detention and Removal Operations (DRO), for which he was never qualified. This is an important position because it governs the fugitive teams that capture illegal aliens, jail them, and deport them.
As we noted, Torres promoted his alleged extramarital bedmate to a job for which she was not qualified and created a supersecret committee to get around government rules governing selections and select his unqualified friends. For his attempted promotion of the woman, Torres was supposed to be suspended for 90 days. But The ICE Princess apparently cancelled or refused to approve the suspension (he hasn’t served it), and instead promoted this evil buffoon. And Torres’ female paramour has reportedly been promoted to Assistant Special Agent in Charge of ICE in Baltimore.
Is this what The ICE Princess means by “Strengthening the Office of Professional Responsibility” in her “fact” sheet?
So the unqualified buddy system at ICE continues. Torres recently hired his golfing buddy, Tim Robbins, as Acting Director of the Criminal Alien Division of DRO. Robbins isn’t even eligible to compete for the position, but he has the one qualification apparently needed for working for Torres: a brown nose.
Forget Halloween. ICE Director of Detention & Removal Operations, John Torres, Plays ICE’s Own George Costanza, Daily . . .
The “fact” sheet claims the alleged achievements are hers:
Under the leadership of Assistant Secretary Julie Myers, U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) achieved historic results.
So we wonder why she’s taking credit for “Hurricane Katrina Response.” She wasn’t on the job until January 9, 2006. Remind us again when it was that Katrina hit and the floods happened.
Then, there is the claim that she is “Expanding Partnerships with State and Local Authorities.” Expanding? Tell that to Costa Mesa Mayor Allan Mansoor. More like “Contracting.”
And there’s The ICE Princess’ claim that she is “Maximizing Bed Capacity,” in which to hold illegal aliens. No, actually, maximizing it would mean that all the increased DRO money that Congress gave to ICE for that specific purpose would go to more beds for aliens and agents to capture them. But that’s not what’s happening. As we noted, thousands in DRO money was wasted on a weeklong party in Kansas City, at which Tommy Lasorda was paid $30-50K for a speech (because Torres loves baseball and is in a fantasy baseball league with other ICE agents). And ICE agents tell us that Myers and Torres are misspending Detention and Removal money on positions in ICE Public Affairs, OPR, Finance, etc.–NOT on beds for aliens.
And there’s more waste. While agents complain to us that ICE has little money for gas for agents’ cars, ICE’s Commercial Fraud Unit used ICE funds to purchase blue canvas folding beach-type chairs fully equipped with coolers installed under the seat. The chairs, embroidered with “ICE Commercial Fraud Investigations,” have been spotted in cubicles all over ICE headquarters.
Wait, isn’t this the same woman who told Congress that her key strength for the job was that she was going to put ICE finances in order and end the waste? Why, yes, it is that same BS-utterer.
Finally, there’s the article in today’s Washington Post, about immigration arrests by Border Patrol agents being down 8% for the fiscal year. Normally, these figures are released in January. But in honor of Tuesday’s elections, DHS chief Michael Chertoff a/k/a Mr. Burns released them early.
But is the 8% decrease in arrests at the border anything to cheer? Not if you consider the possibility–actually, the likelihood–that this means more aliens are making it into the border and beyond, and less are being caught. There are no signs that the number of illegal aliens who make it in is decreasing.
Even the liberal Migration Policy Institute was skeptical:
“Certainly, I don’t think an 8 percent drop in apprehensions is something that we should even be paying attention to,” said Demetrios Papademetriou, president of the Migration Policy Institute, which recently called for a comprehensive overhaul of immigration policy. “We don’t see a trend line in apprehensions.”
Even worse, Chertoff used the numbers to back away from Bush’s promise to control our borders and instead, pimped for more amnesty for illegal aliens:
Chertoff backed away yesterday from the Bush administration’s pledge to control the nation’s borders by 2008, saying it would be “very, very difficult” without a guest-worker program.
Happy Halloween from the tricksters at Homeland Security. Unfortunately, they dress up in costume and pretend on a daily basis.
Tags: Acting Director of the Criminal Alien Division, Acting Director of the Criminal Alien Division of DRO, Allan Mansoor, Assistant Secretary, Assistant Special Agent, Baltimore, Bush, Bush administration, Congress, Costa Mesa, David Lunde, Demetrios Papademetriou, DHS chief, Director of Detention & Removal Operations, George Costanza, Halloween, head, ICE, ICE Director, ICE headquarters, ICE's Commercial Fraud Unit, Integrity, Jennifer Sedgebeer, John Torres, John Torres Costanza, Julie L. Myers, Julie Myers Comedy, Kansas City, Local Authorities, Mayor, Michael Chertoff, Migration Policy Institute, naturaldisaster, Office of Professional Responsibility, President, Princess, Special Agent, State, Tim Robbins, Tommy Lasorda, United States, USD, Washington Post