February 2, 2007, - 4:39 pm
By Debbie Schlussel
**** SCROLL DOWN FOR UPDATE ****
Superbowl Sunday is the biggest day of the year for pizza delivery.
Unfortunately, as today’s Wall Street Journal reports, it’s also the biggest day for strippers (or as they like to euphemize it, “exotic dancers”–nothing exotic about trash, though).
The Journal has a lengthy story about how difficult it is for all of the strippers to get to all of the Superbowl parties to perform at exactly halftime, calculating when it will be. My heart really bleeds for these people who have this dilemma of getting to the right place at the right time to take their clothes off for a room full of total strangers . . . and do who knows what else.
So glad the Wall Street Journal devoted its valuable space to the “dilemma” of Tony Hassan, owner of the Detroit area’s Erotic Image (former home of “Tawny Peaks”):
Mr. Hassan of Erotic Image in Detroit has a different approach: upselling the customers who book early. Starting in January, Mr. Hassan spends a significant portion of his advertising budget marketing a $490 Super Bowl package that includes four performers — a pre-game hostess to greet the guests, a dancer to perform at halftime and a separate “intimate duo” to perform after the game.
This plan not only allows customers to watch the game without interruption, it creates supply-chain efficiencies. A pregame hostess will have plenty of time to travel to a second party to perform at halftime and later, to travel to a third party to participate in a postgame show. By limiting the number of dancers working, Mr. Hassan can guarantee top dancers good earnings and avoid sending out inexperienced recruits. (He often sends trainees with the veterans to observe.)
Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake, eat your hearts out. There’s a new halftime show in town.
**** UPDATE, 02/04/07: I forgot the other disturbing part of this sleazy article. It appears Pamela Anderson is not alone in installing a stripper pole in her home. Apparently, for portable stripper pole companies, business booms right before the Superbowl for “housewives and moms” who want to strip for their husband’s friends at their Superbowl parties. Classy:
If there’s any development that could cut into this business, it’s the growing number of party hosts who want to do it themselves. Platinum Stages of Newport Beach, Calif., a company that sells portable stripper poles that can be installed in living rooms, says sales in the two weeks before the Super Bowl will account for 20% of its $2 million to $3 million in annual revenue. “The people using our products are your basic housewives and moms,” says Kim Homuth, the company’s director of operations.
Sorry, Bobby, I don’t want to see the Superbowl at your house. My mom is stripping for us. Come on over.
Yup, America is sliding downward fast . . . and not just on the stripper pole.
Tags: advertising budget, America, California, dancer, Debbie Schlussel, Detroit, Director of Operations, Janet Jackson, Justin Timberlake, Kim Homuth, Newport Beach, Pamela Anderson, pre-game hostess, pregame hostess, Super Bowl, the Wall Street Journal, Tony Hassan, USD, Wall Street Journal