February 5, 2007, - 3:48 pm

Latest Sad Trend in Valentine’s Day Gifts

By Debbie Schlussel
On the upcoming Valentine’s Day, what do you get for that special woman (guys don’t care about Valentine’s Day gifts, right?) in your life who has everything?
Well, something unique–something she doesn’t already have, like a . . . tattooed goldfish?!
Okay, well it’s not really a goldfish, but, rather, a “parrot cichlid”–a fish that looks like a goldfish.
The fish are imported from China and injected with a dye or burned with a laser with messages like “I (heart) you.” They cost $39-$50 a pop.


This has to be the most ridiculous gift I’ve heard of yet. Who wants a fish with a message on it. The fish will eventually die, anyway. And while I’m not for animal rights, why be cruel in the name of a stupid gift?
Find me a woman who wants to receive this for V-Day, and I’ll show you a bizarrette. And apparently, there are no shortage of those. The Detroit Free Press reports that three Detroit-area pet shops have sold out of the tattooed fish.
Oy. Those who find these amusing are likely cold fish, themselves.

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6 Responses

where is peta ?

PNAMARBLE on February 5, 2007 at 5:15 pm

I’m not a vegetarian or animal rights knutto, but some things are just wrong – humans who do such things or buy said items, are embarassements to the species……

jokermtb on February 5, 2007 at 6:23 pm

“The Detroit Free Press reports that three Detroit-area pet shops have sold out of the tattooed fish.”
And come Valentine’s Day, there will be a corresponding number of men with angry girlfriends.

Dan on February 5, 2007 at 6:49 pm

Note to self:
Send back tattooed goldfish, buy Debbie Schlussel candy or flowers, instead.

The_Man on February 5, 2007 at 11:04 pm

I have three Blood Parrot Cichlids. They are great fish. However, its kind of ironic that these are the fish pictured with this treatment. The fish are not natural fish and by many fish collectors they are shunned because they are a hybrid fish, man made that is. They have no scientific name. They are a cross between a Severum and I think a Red Devil.
so now we have a business that will make people hate the fish and their breeders even more.

Avatar on February 6, 2007 at 12:02 pm

“Darling, my love for you is fishy.”
Ya boy, that’s sure to light the old romantic fire.

Curly Smith on February 6, 2007 at 1:23 pm

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