June 25, 2008, - 5:35 pm

Memo to Desperately-Trying-to-Look-Hip-But-Failing World: Gangsta “Greeting” Out

By Debbie Schlussel
Here’s a tip. When a 78-year-old with not-so-early-onset-dementia and an angry bitch who’s never before been proud of America do something, it’s no longer hip. It’s out. When the angry bitch who’s never before been proud of America does it multiple times, it’s just ugly.
Time to get rid of the fist-bump, or as FOX News Channel’s E.D. Hill calls it, “the terrorist fist jab.” Either way when these people do it, it ain’t cool (not that it ever was). Oh, and memo to US Magazine: It’s not cute. It’s just stupid grown adults trying to look like hip-hop gangstas. Just laughable and embarrassing. Duly so, when the people doing it want to occupy 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Or already have.

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How very “Presidential” . . . if you’re President Camacho at the House of Representin’ (Strong Language Alert):

As reader Robert wrote:

This fist bump thing is the most ridiculous worn out fad I’ve ever seen in my life. Do any women realize how silly this looks? Is this the new (old for most) greeting for girl power? You’ve come along way baby, but I would much rather kiss a woman’s hand than try to bruise her.

Please, Make It Stop!:

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Bottom line: Stop trying to look hip. Try looking dignified for a change. GROW UP.
Exit Question: What ever happened to the High Five?

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16 Responses

I could vote for Kamacho before b.o.! At least this guy seems genuinely in favor of the 2nd amendment.
Also he says it the way he thinks it,lol. The knuckle touch to me is funny and only suitable if the other guy seems too filthy for a real hand shake. That’s just me.

samurai on June 25, 2008 at 5:55 pm

Not sure about the BHO/Michelle “greeting”. But if Barack’s childhood is coming out as his half brother claims he was raised, Michelle might want to go wash up.
BHO used his left hand…
http://www.witness-pioneer.org/vil/hadeeth/riyad/17/chap298.htm
Poo goes in the left hand – food and doing other such things with their right hand.

West Dearbornistan on June 25, 2008 at 6:23 pm

Okay, okay, I see your point. I’m cured.

samurai on June 25, 2008 at 6:56 pm

Debbie
Its not that bad. My son does it to me all the time..of course he is 13 and not even running for eighth grade clas president.

Yidwithlid on June 25, 2008 at 7:00 pm

Where are handshakes and hugs? Gone out of fashion. sigh>

NormanF on June 25, 2008 at 7:30 pm

High fives, hugs, bows, and most other greetings are outlawed by sexual harrassment laws – especially hugging. Hugging is confusing for most females these days as they’re usually brainwashed by the feminists to hate men and affection, but they crave it regardless. So they get confused as to what affection is.
The fist bump isn’t yet justified as sexual harrassment.
I have a rule: if they’re my wife and kids, go ahead and give affection, hugs, etc. If they aren’t my wife and kids; only courtesy and politeness – no contact or affection.
If the world wants things this way, then they can get it, and suffer with their decisions.

bhparkman on June 25, 2008 at 9:28 pm

okay for adolescent and young guys, outside of that, not good.

mindy1 on June 25, 2008 at 9:42 pm

The “fist bump” is a preview of coming attractions. OBummer’s presidential seal change backfired. Can we expect next, a rap national anthem?
In accordance with the Constitution, B. Hussein O. still hasn’t produced a certified copy of a birth certificate (BC). Again, besides being tampered with, and altered, the BC posted on the Daily KOS, was determined to be fake!

Jackson Pearson on June 26, 2008 at 12:21 am

We might as well go all the way and act completely like animals. We’re halfway there already.

c f on June 26, 2008 at 6:16 am

It DOES look absurd when white folks do it…LOL
i remember Mark Jackson and Patrick Ewing doing the fist bump, so your cultural anthropology dissertation is a bit flawed. Y’all crackers scared about a little FUNK in da white house, huh???

EminemsRevenge on June 26, 2008 at 6:39 am

Great job, Debbie! I completely agree that the “fist bump” is stupid. I keep waiting for people to follow the fist bump with “Wonder Twin powers, activate!”

Sola Fide on June 26, 2008 at 7:49 am

“Wonder Twin powers, activate!”
I’m still laughing… and so much for your “FUNK”, E.R.

DocLiberty on June 26, 2008 at 12:06 pm

YOUR POST Debbie, of several ìfist bumpingî pics, a video and then even ìole Georgeî getting in on the actÖwhat can I say? A nation converted?!
Your distress was genuine and was brought home with the header, ìPlease, Make It Stop!î And that was VERY funny.
Full marks to EminemsRevenge though, and his rejoinder.
The ìcrackersî ARE afraid of a little funk in the White House.
Hygiene-wise the fist-bump may be the way to goÖand no women ainít ever gonnaí get injured partaking in the gesture, if you donít mind. Please.
However, in the endÖif we FINALLY see the Pope doing itÖthe world is over, as we know it~

The Canadien on June 26, 2008 at 12:21 pm

Debbie, if we date i would certainly greet you in a more traditional matter. BTW I resolved my equivocation issues just for you.

Anonymous1 on June 26, 2008 at 8:56 pm

Boy, that’s stupid. I’m proud I don’t watch a lot of TV, I wasn’t even aware of all this. I used to worry that I was ‘intolerant’ or ‘hateful’, but I finally realized I’m just smart and 90% of people are idiots.
Eminem, I’m not afraid of a little funk, I’m angered by the continuous, downward slide of our once civil culture. Thanks for your ‘contributions’. When it’s torn down, I’m sure you’ll have replaced it with something much better.

John Harper on June 27, 2008 at 2:53 pm

Are you kidding me? The fist bump is the best thing to come along since Lysol wipes. What better way to avoid shaking some disgusting, disease ridden hand than the fist bump. In case you guys are not up to date on current medical studies, the hand shake is one of the leading spreaders of the common cold and flu, and who knows what else. And how many of us know people who don’t wash their hands after using the bathroom. Hey, if Obama is promoting the fist bump, he has my vote!!!

lsellers on June 28, 2008 at 9:47 pm

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