February 14, 2007, - 9:57 am

Attention, All Men: Worst Valentine’s Day Gift; Don’t Give This

By Debbie Schlussel
For the record, I’m not into the silly Valentine’s Day hype. But still, because it’s a big part of American pop culture and business, I have to follow the story.
I thought there could not possibly be a worse Valentine’s Day gift than the tattooed “I Heart U” fish. But I was wrong.
Elizabeth Arden cosmetics company has developed a gift that is even worse. Guys, if you give this gift, you are in the dog house . . . big-time. From today’s USA Today:

Perfume promotion sends a message: You could get a call from Britney Spears, sort of
By Laura Petrecca
USA TODAY

britneyspearsnewperfume.jpg

NEW YORK – Elizabeth Arden will celebrate Valentine’s Day with a novel, and fast-growing, plan to woo potential customers.
This week, consumers will be able to send personalized recorded messages from Britney Spears hyping her new signature fragrance with Elizabeth Arden, Midnight Fantasy, says Derek Goldberg, president of technology company VariTalk.
Consumers can go to www.midnightfantasybritneyspears.com and enter information such as a recipient’s first name or home state as well as a phone number or e-mail address.
Armed with that information, VariTalk will assemble Spears’ pre-recorded blurbs to create a tailor-made message that can be sent by phone (land line or cell) or e-mail.
For instance, if Tom sends his friend Stacy a message, it would go like this: “Stacy, what’s up? This is Britney Spears. I’m over here with your friend Tom. We were just celebrating the release of my new fragrance called Midnight Fantasy.”

Hilarious. Again, if you give this–or even just Crotch-woman #2’s new perfume (Crotch-woman #1 is here)–to that special woman in your life, say good-bye.

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3 Responses

I “surprised” my wife with Microsoft Vista–and a new computer. Valentine’s Day is expensive!

barrypopik on February 14, 2007 at 12:16 pm

Debbie,
Does this mean I should refrain from asking you to be my valentine? “For the record, I’m not into the silly Valentine’s Day hype.”

OneIrishJew on February 14, 2007 at 2:30 pm

This online gimmick would be far cooler if Brittney was telling us about snakes.

Dan on February 14, 2007 at 11:41 pm

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