December 28, 2008, - 7:19 pm

The Silent “Roar”: Detroit Lions Set Record 0-16 Season

By Debbie Schlussel
To paraphrase Avis Rent-A-Car’s old slogan, the Detroit Lions, today, said:

We’re Number 32. We Try Harder. Or . . . Not Really.

Yup, it’s the first 0-16 season in the history of the National Football League. Hmmm . . . may the slogan should be:

We’re Number 32. We Get Paid Millions No Matter How Hard We Don’t Try.

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Hey, everything else in Detroit is dismal, so why not the Lions, too? Misery loves company. Problem is, it’s hard to be dismal or miserable, when you get hundreds of thousands to take home every week, even though you did a crappy job and came in last. And yet, your industry continues to make millions, regardless.
That’s the life.
***
Read my related column, “Another Detroit Entity That Wants a Bailout: Should Detroit Lions Lose Thanksgiving Day Game?

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15 Responses

The lions should be sold to someone who would operate it as a football team. Michigan has alot of problems and is a depressing place to live and having a football team this bad just adds to that special THIS PLACE SUCKS atmosphere that Michigan has. They claim crime drops in nieghborhoods where the people clean up the graffiti and trash, maybe Michigan needs to clean up it’s football team, too.

rtaylor174 on December 28, 2008 at 7:46 pm

Wow, it really sucks for you guys. Now your 2008 team will forever be known as the NFL team that couldn’t win. It’s time for a change to the Lions (and I don’t mean some BS Obama change) as a franchise, and I think it starts with new ownership.
Not to rub it in, but, my Ravens are in the playoffs!! Beating the not-show-up-Jaguars 27-7.

Squirrel3D on December 28, 2008 at 7:56 pm

Why should they change anything, William Clay Ford has already said earlier this week he wasn’t going to make any changes in management. Also he sounds like wants to keep Rod Marinelli as head coach. I have given up on the Lions long ago. If WCF is really content with what the Lion’s currently have they are well on the road to a 2 year total of 0-32.
With their history of horrible draft picks all their picks this year including the 2 first rounders can be counted on being out of the NFL in 2 years.
GO PACK GO!!!

swede on December 28, 2008 at 8:08 pm

Unfortunately, this outcome for the Lions means that one of my favorite students of all time starts for the worst team in NFL history. Better luck next year, Corey.
Well, at least my Houston Texans went 8-8.

Rhymes With Right on December 28, 2008 at 8:16 pm

Going 0-16 is bad. But it’s not as bad as the Dallas Cowboys. The Cowboys had the best talent in the league and were the overwhelming choice to win the Super Bowl. They won’t be in the playoffs and don’t deserve to be either. Today was the low point in the history of the Dallas Cowboys under Jerry Jones. He needs to fire the general manager immediately. Last week’s game against the Ravens and this weeks abortion against the Eagles was a disaster of biblical proportions. HORRIBLE. I am embarrassed to be a Cowboys fan.

bonzerwolf on December 28, 2008 at 10:33 pm

It could be worse. You could be a Cubs fan (like me).

i_am_me on December 28, 2008 at 10:53 pm

Lions are an old and proud franchise. They had a horrible season with lousy leadership and QB problems. It’s not the end of the world and on the bright side, they can’t do any worse next year.
Oh, and bonzerwolf, you should be ashamed of being a Cowgirls fan *all* the time. Jerruh Jones is a disgrace as is his football philosophy and integrity. Your team is a bunch of thugs, primadonnas and crybabys and your QB is a choke artist girl extraordinaire.

ObamaSlammaJamma on December 28, 2008 at 11:29 pm

I’m sure once they got to 0-11, they said what the heck.

Norman Blitzer on December 29, 2008 at 12:59 am

Bonzerwolf….hate to inform you, but Jerry Jones would never fire the General Manager…since he holds that position. And his ego wouldn’t allow it. As for the Lions. The owners didn’t lose any money this season. Due to the NFL revenue sharing, all the owners clean up…some more than others. I truly think the Giants are in good contention to repeat. Yeah they lost to the Vikings. But, they didn’t want to risk any injuries. The Giants have shown through out the season with injuries and other lose of key players to adapt and overcome these challenges. Will be an interesting post season. Do agree the Cowboys are a bunch of prima-donna’s and crybabies. Terrell Owens is a pure talent. Yet he still causes more problems than what talent he possess. In the end, the players are simply entertainers who are over-paid for what they do. Our priorities are mixed up in this country. Teachers, police officers, fire fighters, etc. Need to be paid appropriately. All comes down to business and the bottom line.

Tenn Scholar on December 29, 2008 at 2:49 am

I like the new Geico slogan:
“0-16: It’s so easy, even the Lions can do it”

Independent Conservative on December 29, 2008 at 4:45 am

Well at least they are not lukewarm. Being the worst team in the history of the NFL may be a horrible distinction, but it is a distinction. (“We will, we will, Shock you…”)I can see it now, the Boys reminiscing, “Hey, remember the time we went 0 and 16?” “Yea, Man, and we still got our full salary.” “Oh Man, I heart America!!”

Roads Skolar on December 29, 2008 at 6:48 am

You gotta admit, it’s the PERFECT metaphor for Detroit, which hasn’t been shit since Motown.
Maybe they can private jet it to D.C. and get some bailout money.

EminemsRevenge on December 29, 2008 at 8:09 am

It’s sad Debbie … for as long as I’ve been alive the Detroit Lions have won just (count em) ONE playoff game … In fact, it was 51 years ago today that the Lions (or Lie Downs as we belovedly refer to them as), Dec 29, 1957, won their last championship. A half century with one playoff game win is beyond terrible.
And now they’ve fired another headcoach, effective this morning … It’s a shame Debbie that we can’t fire the owner.
Jimmy Lewis
SCS, Michigan
Blog: http://rougerevival.blogspot.com/

Jimmy on December 29, 2008 at 11:08 am

So I was wrong they actually did fire Rod today. But they promoted Millen’s 2 assistants to VP and GM respectively. Can’t wait to see how they screw things up now. My vote they try to trade Calvin Johnson and Kevin Smith, the only 2 players on the team that have NFL talent.
Even though I’m a Packers fan, I live in Michigan and it makes the whole state look bad. I’m with Debbie on hoping they lose the thanksgiving day game. Even better make every home game a mandatory blackout and not let WCF get revenue sharing money until he puts a competitive team in place. I’d start by firing the security guard and work up to VP of football operations, fire everyone.
For all the Packer haters who said Aaron Rodgers would have a worse year than Brett Favre, who is the better quarterback now.

swede on December 29, 2008 at 1:45 pm

Very hard to watch sports because they are all for themselves but I did love seeing the meltdown of the Cowboys this year. Mr. Jessica Simpson (Romo) has been overrated since day 1 and TO is a cancer everywhere he goes.
Manning v. Manning Super Bowl? My prediction.

californiascreaming on December 29, 2008 at 7:12 pm

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