April 1, 2009, - 4:02 pm

Next Bailout?: Has-Been, Other Stingy Celebs Want You To fund NEA with $200 Mill More

By Debbie Schlussel
Remember the National Endowment for the Arts? It’s the federally funded entity that funded “Piss Christ” (a cross in jar of urine) and photos by gay “artist” Robert Mapplethorpe of various obscene naked gay poses.
Well, now a group of celebrities want you to give $200 million more the the NEA. They include Wynton Marsalis, Josh Groban and this has-been fat chick–can you guess who she is? I’ll give you a hint: her name is Linda Ronstadt, and she was once the girlfriend (in her leaner days) of Gov. Moonbeam, now California Attorney General Jerry Brown.
Ronstadt whined to Congress that kids can’t sing “Happy Birthday” in the right pitch anymore because of less NEA funding. Hmmm . . . how does funding gay photos and crucifixes in urine-filled bell jars cause kids to sing on key? Just wondering.

lindaronstadt.jpg

Linda Ronstadt & Wynton Marsalis Put Their Hands Out to Congress

And, gee, you don’t see Josh Groban or Wynton Marsalis offering to give any of their multi-millions to fund this, just yours.
You know what? We have a way to fund art. It’s called the marketplace. And it doesn’t cost taxpayers an extra penny.
Wanna learn how to sing Happy Birthday with the proper pitch? Watch “American Idol” and listen to Simon’s advice. I guarantee that will help more with pitch than some warped “artist”‘s obscene and offensive trash that simply doesn’t have any willing takers in the free market.
$200 million isn’t a lot of money for the Hollywood elite. If every record company, every top singing star donated $5-10 million, they’d have plenty of money to give away to whatever crap “artists” they wish to. But they’re stingy, except when it comes to your money.
That’s when they put their hands out for the next Robert Mapplethorpe.

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12 Responses

Debbie, That is not Linda Ronstandt. That is man in drag. April Fool’s Joke?

californiascreaming on April 1, 2009 at 4:58 pm

Damn! Now I’m going to have to spend at least a day staring at my “Hasten down the wind” album cover to get the above photo burned out of my mind.

stevecanuck on April 1, 2009 at 6:02 pm

linda ronstadt should be in front of congress on singer who dont write there own song and pass it off like the wrote them.dont forget the hearing on once hot female singer who now tip the scale at 400lbs.

PNAMARBLE on April 1, 2009 at 6:46 pm

DS, Marsalis is every bit as fat as Ronstadt. You seem to have a problem with other women, I’ve noticed.
[49: HUH? SHE’S WAAAAAY FATTER. IT’S NOT EVEN CLOSE. PLEASE GET YOUR EYES CHECKED STAT. AS FOR OTHER WOMEN, AGAIN, YOU’RE SEEING THINGS NOT IN EVIDENCE. I DON’T LIKE DUMB WOMEN (OR DUMB MEN). THERE’S A DIFFERENCE. SORRY TO GET IN THE WAY OF YOUR AGENDA. DS]

49smudge on April 1, 2009 at 7:08 pm

I think the NEA is horseshit, but what really struck me about this post is
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WTF happened to Ronstadt? She used to be so cute. Right now it’s all I can do to get the sound of her singing “Poor,Poor Pitiful Me” out of my head. It’s one thing to become heavy, Marie Osmond ballooned up – but she stayed attractive. Ronstadt looks like Shrek without the green. I think I’ll go lay down on the tracks and wait for the 7:07.

Richard on April 1, 2009 at 7:39 pm

Were Groban, Marsalis or Ronstadt ever supported by NEA in their early careers? I do not think so. Ability will find buyers.
chsw

chsw on April 1, 2009 at 8:04 pm

who cares what pitch kids sing happy birthday in? there are bigger problems in the world

mindy1 on April 1, 2009 at 8:42 pm

Debbie, you have mistakenly labeled the people in the photograph. It is obviously Peter Griffin of “Family Guy” on the left and sitting beside him is Erkel from the old sitcom “Family Matters”.

goldtop023 on April 1, 2009 at 8:52 pm

Oy vey. What happened to the adorable Ronstadt?

kishke on April 1, 2009 at 9:56 pm

OMG!! When I was a kid she was the future prototype for my ideal women. We don’t consciously choose our ideal look but she was in my top 5. But now…. I am blown away! Maybe all the fat cells are clogging her optic nerves and she has no idea she’s become a monster. I… can’t…seem…to…stopp…staring….

samurai on April 1, 2009 at 10:08 pm

Holy Shiite Batman – Ronstadt (I loved her songs but hate her left wing politics) has turned into a class A-1 heifer!!!

Ripper on April 2, 2009 at 9:06 am

I think that Linda has spent too much time hanging at Dunkin’ Donuts.

Ripper on April 2, 2009 at 9:42 am

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