May 15, 2009, - 3:25 pm

More Weekend Box Office: “Tyson”–Glorifying a Thuggish Idiot Who Became a Muslim

By Debbie Schlussel
I’ve already reviewed “Angels & Demons.” The other new movie out, this weekend, is the documentary “Tyson.”
I think it’s hard to actually call this a “documentary,” because it doesn’t document anything. It’s Mike Tyson going on and on about his life, and there’s simply nothing new in it. There are no interviews with anyone else. It’s just a video ode to a guy that doesn’t deserve one. Mike Tyson is a thug, and an uncivilized monster who messed up every single thing in his life. And he converted to Islam. But, then, I repeat myself.

tyson.jpg

Tyson talks about how he enjoyed robbing White people and sleeping around. And he tries in vain to use big words that sound important, but yet he doesn’t know what they mean and uses them improperly. My favorite part is when he tells us how he met everyone important, including the “President of Istanbul.” There is no President of Istanbul (but there is a President and a Prime Minister of Turkey). He can’t travel to South Africa to meet his idol and friend, Nelson Mandela, “because of probation problems.” No kidding.
My other favorite part is when Tyson tells us of his conversion to the “Religion of Peace,” as Mike Tyson really is emblematic of most of the soulless, thuggish, empty Americans who try to find who they don’t have in Islam, and don’t get anything new from it, but for extremism:

When I was in jail, I lost faith in G-d. I became a Muslim in prison, but I really lost faith in myself. When I first took my shehadah [DS: Islamic oath of martyrdom, the uttering of which makes one a Muslim], I became extreme. I used Islam because I was bitter at the world. I was full of hate.

Yup, that sounds like your typical Muslim convert. Or just typical Muslim, period. Sadly, Tyson goes on to try to rehabilitate Islam and tell us of the “true Islam,” bragging of his Islamic, Che Guevara, and Mao tattoos and how ahead of his time he was to admire these scumbags. You trendsetter, you. But we can’t forget his famous statement to Lennox Lewis, which strangely now includes what our media left out at the end–the part about Allah.

I want your heart. I want to eat his children, praise be to Allah.

The most disgusting part of the movie are scenes of mobs of fans (most of them White) greeting this thug, Tyson, when he gets released from prison on rape charges, and watching this brainless mob follow him to the mosque, the first place he goes (to pray).
Tyson’s statements about how his character in relation to Islam is one of the few insights in this entire movie. The rest of just crap, unless you consider Tyson’s disgusting, vulgar renditions of some of his sexual escapades and how he “grew up in a promiscuous neighborhood, a promiscuous family, my mom was promiscuous, everyone was promiscuous, everyone was like suck my d—, lick my p—-,” an “insight.” (And as if that somehow excuses his animal-like behavior.) Anyone who reads a paper or watched a news report knows that sex is rampant in the ghetto. It’s no revelation when Tyson tells us how he got gonorrhea “from a prostitute or a filthy woman or something.” That he can’t remember is a pretty good indication that someone needs to look in the mirror when he tells us about “filth.”
We also know that racism is, too. Tyson tells us that a fighter who is White was a “punk-assed White boy,” and that when the late trainer Cus D’Amato took him into his home in the suburbs, “I wanted to rob those White people.” Tyson does admit that while he hated White people, he chose as his handler, the man who stole a lot of his money–the

wretched, slimy reptilian motherf–ker Don King. This is supposed to be my Black brother. I attacked him in front of these old, decrepit White women. They probably thought I was some Black heathen or something. But I stomped him and I stomped him and I stomped him.

And after that beating and some legal battles, King only gave him back “a small amount” of his money.

He finally gave me a small amount of money. It waas like 20 or 30 million or something. I don’t know how much, but it was really small.

Ah, Tyson–always the guy to have everything in perspective. And not violent either, like in the case of dining on Ear of Evander (Holyfield) or Leg of Lennox (Lewis).

I wasn’t upset with myself that I bit his ear, but that I lost my composure. At that point, I didn’t care about the fight. He hurt me, and I wanted to inflict the most pain possible against him.

Let’s hear it for Tyson perspective and maturity.
Way to go, Mike. Whatta guy. On the other hand, it is Don King, so I think we can give him a pass.
On the other hand, the perpetually sick-in-the-head Tyson tells us he liked people who were leeches. “I wanted them to suck my blood.” And how could you find a bigger leech than King, whom some stupid Republicans glommed onto in 2004 when he said he was voting for Bush?
It’s much of the obvious: Tyson telling us how he became a big boxer, how he made and spent most of his money, how he had so many women, how his obtrusively ugly face tattoo represents a Maori warrior (funny, he doesn’t look Maorish), how he didn’t really beat Robin Givens, and how the rape charges against him were made up (I do believe this claim, but not because he said so). Probably the funniest line is when Tyson speaks of getting sent to a juvenile detention center at age 12, where he runs into many of his equally youthful criminal consorts.

All of my friends that I hadn’t seen in a while, and I wondered where they went–they were there. Going to juvenile detention, it was like a class reunion.

One interview clip the movie shows is that of Tyson telling a TV interviewer:

I want to put the bourgeoisie and the erudites in their place–you know, all the people who think I’m trash and I’m scum. I’ll be trash and scum, but I’ll be angelic trash and scum.

Huh? You keep telling yourself that, Rusted Iron Mike. Leave bad attempts at working class bonhomie to the professionals. This is definitely a case where bourgeoiesie and erudites are underrated.
Finally, Tyson tells us some truth:

I never left the street corner . . . . I’m an insane individual.

No kidding. But did I need to sit through more than an hour of Mike Tyson yapping, as if he’s giving me some holy insight, to hear him utter the obvious?
I had to laugh, this morning, when I heard director James Toback say his movie explores the “depths,” “inner poignancy,” and “existential abyss” that he claims is Mike Tyson.
Sorry, but after watching this movie, I didn’t see any of that. Not even close. But maybe with enough such fertilizer from the director, something will grow.
On second thought . . . nah.
TWO MARXES
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18 Responses

Wow….I’ll bet Nintendo is feeling good, knowing they won’t have this piece of shit in their new “Punch-Out” game coming to the Wii.
There’s a reason why they changed the champion completely in their re-iusse of the orignal NES “Punch-Out”: Becuase Tyson got out of control and has been that way since.
Oh, and he’s been involved in Wrestlemania 14. Gee I wonder why he didn’t go crazy in front of all those wrestlers in the locker room?

Squirrel3D on May 15, 2009 at 9:46 pm

Mike Tyson = Another brain-dead follower of islam.
Mike Tyson = A serial criminal who rapes women (he served prison time for rape) and who beats women. Like most violent criminals, he converted to islam while in prison. He’s an uneducated Neanderthal who resolves all disputes through violence. He doesn’t have two brain cells to rub together. He can’t string words together to make a coherent sentence. All in all, he’s the perfect spokesman for islam.
Mohammad would be proud to have this mindless killer and rapist as one of his followers. The only thing that mohammad has over Tyson is being a pedophile….but, there’s still time.

Thee_Bruno on May 15, 2009 at 9:52 pm

And they let YOU into movies for free???
Maybe you don’t have pictures like THIS:
http://x81.xanga.com/a2bf243ad8032243146369/b192607532.jpg
in Detroit…but i doubt it!
EVERY CRITIC i’ve read said that’s a great movie…but you & your little klanboy followers have so hardened your hearts that y’all MUST pray there is no hell, because y’all AC/DCing it there!
[And since i don’t underestimate the ignorance of your audience: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0fLxIuyI654&feature=related ]

EminemsRevenge on May 16, 2009 at 7:58 am

Tyson: My toaster has a higher IQ.

BPT on May 16, 2009 at 8:30 am

Ms. Schlussel, thought you might appreciate a link to the following:
http://blogs.ocweekly.com/navelgazing/gimme-that-oc-religion/amir-abdel-malik-ali-a-uci-mus/
Not 100% sure what you’ll think. To be sure, OCWeekly’s a pretty liberal publication and Mr. Arellano’s a proudly liberal writer (as well as something of a friend of mine). Nevertheless, I think it’s nice to see them call out these activists’ hostility against Jews and gays.

qdpsteve on May 17, 2009 at 3:27 am

Your review of Mike Tyson’s movie or life had me laughing in stitches. Thankfully, you put all his whining of a screwed up life in the trash where it belongs. It seems he is whining about everyone and everything. “Mike Tyson is a thug, and an uncivilized monster who messed up every single thing in his life. And he converted to Islam. But, then, I repeat myself.” LMAO!! Debbie You Rock.
“but I’ll be angelic trash and scum” this is got to be in the quote hall of fame. I might see this trash just to get some good laughs. Kind of watching a train wreck.
You mentioned some Republicans pandering with Don King 2004. Guess who I saw on Huckabee last night? Elizabeth Hasslebeck. She was asked about “enhanced interrogation”. Are you kidding me. Watching the pathetic response of the Right so far toward Obama and the Left has gone from anger to laughter. The republicans are impotent, incompetent and clueless.
[CS: YES, ELISABETH HASSELBECK, THE GREAT INTELLECTUAL LIGHT AND MILITARY ANALYST OF THE RIGHT. AND WE WONDER WHY THE COUNTRY IS OVERWHELMINGLY LIBERAL. YOU ARE SO RIGHT. DS]

californiascreaming on May 17, 2009 at 9:06 am

James Toback, the “director”, is a textbook ,Self-Loathing White/Jew, and has a history of making movies and documentaries that totally glorify and excuse Black thugs and athletes, and paint Whites and Jews as the villains and idiots in our views of Blacks,race relations,Black culture( As if Rap can be called Culture ),etc,etc.And this is nothing but his latest cinematic #2.

OldSchoolW on May 17, 2009 at 11:48 am

Many celebrities are untreated schizophrenics. People with exaggerated notions of themselves drift into sport and acting. When they succeed, they acquire fans who further reinforce their delusions.
http://www.lucire.com.au/documents/pps/towards_a_taxonnnomy_of_confabulation.pps
http://blogs.psychcentral.com/celebrity/2009/03/dr-dobransky-thinks-joaquin-phoenix-could-be-schizophrenic/

supercargo on May 17, 2009 at 5:06 pm

Muhammad was a murder, rapists, and a pedophile.
No wonder Tyson feel right with Islam.

Burt on May 18, 2009 at 7:29 am

Why do you keep deleting my comments? I have not been abusive or needlessly inflammatory. I simply pointed out the need for a minor correction in the text of this movie review, referring to a slight misquotation, which you appropriated without acknowledgement.
[SB: I CORRECTED IT, AND YOU WERE NITPICKING. ENOUGH. DS]

stevebeadle on May 18, 2009 at 3:00 pm

By the way, “Maorish” is not a word.
[SB: THAT IS A JOKE. DS]

stevebeadle on May 18, 2009 at 3:10 pm

The bloke is an A-grade fool.
Sure – he can fight and he could clean me up without having to breathe hard but that makes him no less a brainless wanker of clearly questionable values – especially since he joined the Cult Of The Paedophile!
The funny thing is that I hope, I hope, I hope like anything that one day he will meet a genuine Maori who will not bow and scrape at his feet and will take great exception to him bearing a tattoo to which he is not entitled to wear.
Funny thing about Moaris is that you can punch some of them with everything you have and they will just look at you.
I am smiling already at the thought of “Iron” Mike Tyson (“The baddest man on the planet” to use the words of WWE’s Vince McMahon, although use of “man” is definitely misplaced) swinging at one of these blokes and bouncing off.
It would be funnier again if it were a Moari woman – some of them are downright TOUGH >:)

Jai Normosone on May 19, 2009 at 3:03 am

Tysons actions were purely normal from what life he lived no one can blame him for what happend in his life people are blind and ignorant the reason why mike was so aggresive is because the media made a monster out of him and mike lost the real fight which was against the media always remember the media only shows you what they want to show you
and never forget idiot people.
people are dumb but a person is smart
do your research then judge people

osman on May 19, 2010 at 7:59 am

I understand your issue with Tyson, but I don’t get why you have to keep attacking Muslims in this piece too.

The ‘shahadah’ isn’t the “Islamic oath of martyrdom”, but rather simply what you say to confirm your belief in God and conversion to Islam. Nothing to do with martyrdom.

I’m also dismayed to find that you think the typical Muslim is full of hate. Really, all 1.2 billion of them? Even as a generalisation do you really think that holds true?

Finally, the “praise be to Allah” comment is usually added by Muslims at the end of a speech, regardless of what was said beforehand. They aren’t necessarily related, and hence while the “eat his children” comment is obviously a bizarre thing to say, rather widely accepted too so not exactly shedding new light here, it has nothing to do with his mentioning of Allah.

AKR on November 17, 2010 at 9:23 am

Iabsolutelylovehowthiscompletmoronddofawomanistryingtobringherselfsomeattentionusingthisarrogantattitudetosuchagreatman.YYoumayhatehimbecauseheisntasprettyasyoudlikehimtobebutseeingashowniceanddowntoearthheiswithoutthestressofpreviouproblemsheshad,Icantbelieveyouresayingthisutterlybiasedandoverexaggerrattedcrapabouthim

gj on June 28, 2011 at 9:56 pm

I’d be this pissed too if I looked like Debbie. Jesus, how old are you and why do you dress like that? You need to tone down on the makeup and start dressing like an elderly woman. You’re so decrepit, oh God I hope I dont look like you someday…

Bobby on February 3, 2012 at 4:22 am

Funny thing is most of you cowards would crap yor pants at the sight of Mike Tyson everyone on this post is a coward whith no heart to step in a ring. Mike Tyson was one of the best Heavyweight boxers ever he repersent what most of these cowards and Debbie hate, black male dominance there havent been a dominant american white champ sine the 50’s and that erkes debbie guys like mike tyson will continue to dominate boxing,football and basketball and make more money and be more famous than Debbie.

Antonio on March 22, 2012 at 12:15 am

Word placement? who gives a shit about word placement. this gives people like YOU insight on a great and disturbed mind a man and your writing about word placement? Let me add that every religion is extreme if your 100% to your religion. dont insult islam because it has more devout followers than this new watered down version of Christianity that american people claim. im neither but you seem extremely pessimistic. there was something to benefit from this if you have an open mind. from your article its clear you lack that. Mike tyson is troubled thats without question but he still has good qualities and characteristics. if everyone had the same battles and hardships as him while being on camera most of there lives im sure they would also take on some of his bad habits and qualities. furthermore regardless of his vocabulary and proper use of words, a lot of his aspects on life as a black man in america are relate-able and realistic, he simply took on the role of a menace and monster as opposed to trying his entire life to suffice the opinion a group of big headed, egotistical, contradicting, self proclaimed superiors like YOU, (not the white race). also just because he converted to islam in jail doesnt undermine the fact that he wholeheartedly and full-consciously took on a religion. most people basically inherit there religion from there parents. assuming your white, you justify his entire ideology, you are the definition of what he constantly talks about, as if your perfect. obviously simple minded and judgmental. until you’ve had another persons hardships keep your judgments to a minimum. and of course he was race aware. hes a black man in america ! your a pompous dumb fuck with no awareness or sense of understanding the realities of america.

pablo on July 5, 2013 at 6:19 am

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