March 26, 2007, - 9:59 am
By Debbie Schlussel
Republican political consultant Craig Shirley on a Newt Gingrich Presidential candidacy:
Among the 2008 GOP aspirants, he is probably the only one who knows the difference between Friedrich Hayek and Salma Hayek.
That’s true. I know Newt Gingrich, like his views, and I’d probably support him if he ran. But I don’t think he could ever win a race for the Presidency, for one reason–a reason which trumps his ability to distinguish between the famous Hayeks (one’s a famed free marketeer, the other a pregnant Latina actress):
Among the 2008 GOP aspirants, Newt Gingrich is the only one who now has more chins than he had marriages.
Sorry, but Newt has gotten too fat and slovenly-looking. And contemporary America will never elect a fat President, no matter how smart, charismatic, and articulate he is.
I mean, you don’t exactly want a guy with his finger on the button, who has his other fingers wrapped around a drumstick. Unless one is disabled, fat and slovenly equals lack of discipline, which can translate into other things (like laziness vis-a-vis principles and standing tough). Regardless, looks do matter in politics. Just ask President Kennedy and all of the women who elected him.
Please Newt, get a personal trainer, fast.
FYI, the fattest U.S. President was William Howard Taft, at 352 pounds (and 6 feet tall), and kept getting stuck in the White House bathtub (to the point where an extra large bathtub had to be installed).
But that was well before the era of telegenics. He’d never be elected now. (Chubby chasers aren’t exactly an important or influential voting bloc.) And, in fact, he spawned a whole genre of President Taft fat jokes.
Tags: America, Craig Shirley, fat President, Friedrich Hayek, Kennedy, personal trainer, pregnant Latina actress, President, Republican Party, Republican political consultant, Salma Hayek, United States, White House, William Howard Taft, William Howard Taft-esque Proportions