October 17, 2005, - 4:40 pm
By Debbie Schlussel
Last week, pages of USA Today contained the usual ads over the settlement of class action lawsuits.
The latest was particularly important: a class action lawsuit against the Russell Stover candy company for the “crime” of candy labeled as “low carb” that contained more carbohydrates than advertised.
Doesn’t this sound like a hilarious “Seinfeld” episode about “low-fat” frozen yogurt? Yes, it does. And that’s where absurd class action lawsuits like this one belong–in the sitcoms, not our real-life court system.
Reading the settlement ad is like reading a comic book: “A refund of thirty cents ($.30) for each purchase of a “low carb” candy, up to a maximum of 5 purchases.”
Wonderful. Marvelous. Lucky you could get up to a buck and a half, while lawyers James H. McFerrin and James Stirling of the Birmingham, Alabama law firm of McFerrin, Stirling & Hood collects gazillions in legal fees for their “heroic” litigation on behalf of low-carb warriors everywhere.
I can hardly wait for the movie, starring Camryn Manheim.
Tags: Alabama, Alabama law, Birmingham, Camryn Manheim, Candy By Debbie Schlussel Last, cent, James H. McFerrin, James Stirling, Seinfeld, USA Today, USD