Debbie Schlussel: Nasty Rumor: Michael "Chiquita Terrorists" Chertoff to Replace Resigned Gonzales as AG


By Debbie Schlussel

Over the weekend, a number of readers sent me posts from lots of blogs and this U.S. News & World Report claim that Attorney General Alberto Gonzales would resign and that Michael "Serpenthead" Chertoff would replace him. Well, the first part of the rumor came to pass almost immediately (I called for Gonzales to be fired a while ago), so will this?:

Maybe Trading Up Soon at Justice

The buzz among top Bushies is that beleaguered Attorney General Alberto Gonzales finally plans to depart and will be replaced by Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff. Why Chertoff? Officials say he's got fans on Capitol Hill, is untouched by the Justice prosecutor scandal, and has more experience than Gonzales did, having served as a federal judge and assistant attorney general.

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Bad To Worse: Him for Him?

I beg to differ. If the Bush Administration is smart (and I've never accused them of that), they would avoid nominating a man (Chertoff), who--now we all know--approved cash payments to a terrorist group because they were made by his cronies (and a former law partner) at Chiquita Banana. Chertoff knew Chiquita was paying off terrorists and let it continue for over a year, doing nothing about it and reporting it to no-one.

If the Democrats were truly the "loyal opposition"--and on the important issues, they've been, frankly, timid--the banana terrorist payments would have been a major issue and Chertoff would have been the one resigning, today. And on trial for obstruction of justice and public corruption charges over this (not to mention having his law license revoked).

So, who knows if they will have the guts to use it against him in any confirmation hearings. I doubt it. They may not be chicken-hawks. But they definitely are chickens.

One other thing: Notice the USN&WR headline calls Chertoff going to Justice, "trading up." That should tell you something about how he's run his agency . . . into Filene's Bargain Basement.

Upside: If Chertoff goes to Justice, maybe he'll take "The ICE Princess" with him. That would be a GREAT thing.

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Coming Soon to "Justice"?
(Julie Myers Diet Coke by David Lunde)

Posted by Debbie on August 27, 2007 08:59 AM to Debbie Schlussel