August 11, 2008

VH1's New "Fatherhood" Role Model: Is It Just Me . . .

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By Debbie Schlussel

. . . Or is there something VERY wrong with "2 Live Crew"'s Luther "Luke Skywalker" Campbell's new set-up as a fatherhood role model? That's what VH1 is pimping on America, starting tonight on "Luke's Parental Advisory"--a "family values" show (if you're talkin' John Edwards family values).

Remember him? Luther Campbell is the has-been best known for the grotesque, "Me So Horny," with lyrics, such as "My D-ck So Hard," which they, sadly, played uncensored on MTV and MTV2 (full disgusting lyrics below). Every song by this guy was obscene and basically X-rated, and all of his "albums" (if you can call them that) carried Parental Advisory warnings.

Now, Campbell has continued in his path of filth by taking up as a pornography company owner.

luthercampbell.jpg
Luther Campbell of 2 Live Crew:
VH1's New PG-Rated "Fatherhood Role Model"

Oh, and he's debuting tonight on VH1 as the epitome of "fatherhood . . . a role model for his kids." (They don't mention that his two kids we're had out-of-wedlock from a past "relationship.")

That's the VH1 press release BS, but in reality, Luther Campbell is one of those rare cases where kids would be better off withOUT their father. In this case, he's a nasty, filthy cesspool of garbage. The only lesson in fatherhood and role-modeling he can teach them is the obvious: "Do as I say, not as I do."

VH1 also describes him as a "Constitutional rights activist," because he fought for the right to use a woman's orgasmic scream sound effects from "Full Metal Jacket" in his filthy "Me So Horny." Wow, a bastion of American patriotism, this guy.

By the way, most of the newspaper articles on this show describe Campbell as a "businessman," but they don't say that his "business" is porn. Kudos to the New York Times for at least having the guts to tell the truth in its coverage of this waste of time, trashy show. Sadly, while pointing out what a crummy show it is, even the NYTimes pimps it as a "guilty-pleasure classic":

"Luke's Parental Advisory," belongs to the wild-parent genre of reality family shows . . . . Luther Campbell, who made his name with "Me So Horny" two decades ago and now runs his own pornography production company, tries to keep his teenage son and daughter on the straight and narrow. But he doesn't try all that hard. "You call yourself a player?" he asks upon learning that his 14-year-old son has only one girlfriend.

With its pole-dancing auditions, blustering admonitions ("The girlfriend with the baby, she gotta go") and constant apologias for the family business, "Luke's Parental Advisory" may become a guilty-pleasure classic. The show it is most reminiscent of, in some ways, is "The Sopranos," with Mr. Campbell as a more avuncular Tony, forced by his profession to hang out at strip clubs. [DS: Methinks Tony Soprano is turning over in his pay-cable grave; this show is on regular prime-time cable, where kids can easily tune in.] . . .

[There] is a forthright emphasis on cleavage. It's Mr. Campbell's job.

Sorry, but there's a line between "guilty pleasure" and "depraved outrage." Campbell long ago crossed that line. Hard to believe, but this show is only rated TV-PG. Unfortunately, too many Ps won't give the proper G, and a lot of American kids will think the Campbell Family values are the way to go.

I'm not posting the disgusting, orgasmic scream "Me So Horny" video here. But here are the "lyrics"--if you call this crap, "lyrics". With "role models" and "fathers" like this, why doesn't VH1 just do a show, "Bin Laden's Family Values," or "Ron Jeremy: America's New Role Model"? Oops, I just gave them some ideas they might act on.

"Me So Horny" By 2 Live Crew

What'll we get for ten dollars?
Every ting you want
Everything?
Everyting
Ooh! don't do that, baby! ahh!
Hold on this! oh, sock it to me! aaahh!
Ooohh!

Chorus (repeated during breakdowns):
Ahh! me so horny!
Me love you long time!

Verse 1: [Brother Marquis]
Sittin at home with my d--k on hard
So I got the black book for a freak to call
Picked up the telephone, then dialed the 7 digits
Said, yo, this Marquis, baby! are you down with it?
I arrived at her house, knocked on the door
Not having no idea of what the night had in store
I'm like a dog in heat, a freak without warning
I have an appetite for sex, 'cuz me so horny

Chorus
Ahh! me so horny!
Me love you long time!

Verse 2: [Fresh Kid Ice]
Girls always ask me why I f--k so much
I say what's wrong, baby doll, with a quick nut?
'Cuz you're the one, and you shouldn't be mad
I won't tell your mama if you don't tell your dad
I know hell be disgusted when he sees your p---y busted
Wont your mama be so mad if she knew I got that ass?
I'm a freak in heat, a dog without warning
My appetite is sex, cause me so horny

Chorus
Ahh! me so horny!
Me love you long time!

Verse 3: [Brother Marquis]
You can say I'm desperate, even call me perverted
But you say I'm a dog when I leave you f--ked and deserted
I'll play with your heart just like it's a game
I'll be blowing your mind while you're blowing my brains
I'm just like that man they call Georgie Puddin Pie
I f--k all the girls and I make em cry
I'm like a dog in heat, a freak without warning
I have an appetite for sex, cause me so horny.

Chorus
Breakdown(4x):
Ahh! hold on this! oh, sock it to me!

Chorus
Ahh! me so horny!
Me love you long time!

Verse 4: [Fresh Kid Ice]
It's true, you were a virgin until you met me
I was the first to make you hot and wetty-wetty
You tell your parents that we're goin' out
Never to the movies, just straight to my house
You said it yourself, you like it like I do
Put your lips on my d--k, and suck my a--hole too
I'm a freak in heat, a dog without warning
My appetite is sex, cause me so horny

Chorus
Breakdown (repeated till end of track):
F--kie suckie. Me f--kie suckie.

Yup, America, the man who made this vile filth is the new role model for fatherhood. Awesome.

If you let your kids watch this show, they should sue you for malpractice.

Posted by Debbie at August 11, 2008 09:20 AM

Comments

Please Debbie!
I'm reading this before breakfast.

Ah, me so nauseous.

Posted by: poetcomic1 [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 11, 2008 10:14 AM

Men's sexual natures can lead them to use anything as a sexual outlet. Rape, adultery and homosexuality are extremes to which they can exhibit their sexuality, to the detriment of the well-being of society. That's why for men, the obligation to show decent behavior is a lifetime task. And filth promoted by the likes of Luther Campbell just makes its that much harder. Men need responsible role male role models to be good guys. Women can show men love and compassion but men will only learn the rules of being a gentlemen and constraining their baser appetites from men who show them what it means to be a real man. "Everything goes" should not be the rule of our culture - there's the welfare of women and children to think about.

Posted by: NormanF [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 11, 2008 10:35 AM

It actually frightens me when I think about how far down hill society has fallen in only 50 years. Think about the music and movies, family unit structure, pretty much anything that glues this country together and then you look at todays Jerry Springer, hip hop and fatherless families. Wow.

Posted by: samurai [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 11, 2008 11:03 AM

I alway link to YouTube's "Do Wah Diddy" by 2 Live Crew whenever I want to demonstrate to someone the total collapse of Western civilization.

Posted by: Sue Denemme [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 11, 2008 12:43 PM

As someone said before, I too have yet to eat anything and I feel sick already.

Posting those lyrics wasn't needed ether Deb.

There are men out there who are 10 times the role models this fith of a guy is.

Posted by: Squirrel3D [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 11, 2008 01:14 PM

........nothin' but black trash........and a serious stereotype.

But God help us if we want to watch 'Amos 'n' Andy'.

Posted by: guitarguy [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 11, 2008 02:11 PM

Squirrel3D:

Actually, she *did* have to post the lyrics. Luke Campbell's career was helped a lot by liberal lemmings, who rushed to defend his free speech rights, without having a clue as to what he was saying.

Of course, he does have free speech, but I don't think that many of his Leftie defenders would have wanted their own kids playing that stuff. I know--I purposely brought his cassette of Me So Horny to a Leftie friend's house, and starting playing it. He turned it off---fast.

Based on my music industry background, I can assure you that many execs involved in distributing this material have no idea what it contains.

Also, I knew the duplicator who did Campbell's first release, and let's just say that his business practices were in line with the lyrics.

Posted by: Red Ryder [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 11, 2008 03:33 PM

I guess I should be glad I never understand what these "songs" say.

Posted by: interestinconundrum [TypeKey Profile Page] at August 12, 2008 10:17 AM

Easy solution:

1) Don't listen to his albums
2) Don't watch his show
3) Don't let your kids do numbers 1 & 2
4) If you follow steps 1-3, its no longer an issue and you can let the rest of us listen and watch whatever we want.

Posted by: dazman111 [TypeKey Profile Page] at November 17, 2008 11:25 PM

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