By Debbie Schlussel
Happy Thanksgiving, America! And Happy Thanksgiving to all of my American friends and readers.
American Thanksgiving Used to Look Like This . . .
What Thanksgiving Will Look Like in a Few Generations if We Continue with Biz as Usual . . .
Halal Thanksgiving Artwork by David Lunde/Lundesigns (& Norman Rockwell); Design by Debbie Schlussel (& Norman Rockwell)
As on every Thanksgiving to date, I’m thankful I’m still free and that I live in the greatest country on earth. That’s the United State of America, to those of you in Dearbornistan, Minneapolistan, Fergustan, and all the other Third World fiefdoms that have sprung up in our midst and seem to think this is Dar Al-Harb, just an extension of the Muslim Mid-East to be “reverted” and destroyed. That will come in a few generations (and has already begun), but we, thankfully, won’t be around to see it. That’s another thing I’m thankful for: while America has been Kardashianized and Oprahfied and subject to the non-“breaking” of the Internet by someone’s artificially enlarged butt, we’re still here, and in our time remaining on this earth, we will see far worse. But we won’t see the worst. That’s coming, but it isn’t here yet.
For now, we can be thankful for our good health (for those of us who have it, and not everyone does, so my heart goes out to those people afflicted) and for the roofs over our heads for those of us who have that. With ObamaCare soon to be in full force, we may be in danger of losing both. Fortunately, there are only two more years (plus a couple of months of non-sensical pardons) left of the Barack & Michelle years. The Obama’s will soon be gone. Sadly, I’m pretty confident that, despite all the “what ifs,” Hillary Cankles Clinton will be there to feed at the trough in her ever-expanding pantsuits after the Obamas leave. And, then, things will get worse. So, be thankful now, while the going is still better than it’s gonna get.
Today, we have the freedom to eat turkey (torfurkey if you’re one of those people–that’s gotta suck!), watch football, and brave the mobs in crazy Black Thursday that used to be Black Friday. And I guess that says something: that things are still relatively good here–good enough that we can worry about unimportant things like football and bargains on 50-inch TVs and whether or not Kim Kardashian’s silly, loathsome photos “broke” the internet (and how long it will take her transvestite stepfather, Bruce Jenner, to make the full transition; what Wheaties box?!). Read the rest of this entry »