September 24, 2007, - 6:24 pm

Hypocrita: Cameron Diaz’s New Enviro-Friendly Tips for Kiddies

If you want to teach your kids something other than “Do as I say, not as I do,” don’t buy them the latest issue (October) of National Geographic Kids.
The magazine’s first “Green Issue” not only bears environmental activist/actress Cameron Diaz on the cover, but she’s the “guest editor,” and inside, she offers your kiddies tips for becoming environmentally active:

Cameron Diaz on the Environment: Do As I Say, NOT As I Do

“I wash the plastic wrap after I use it, but I also do things like put a plate over the bowl instead of plastic wrap. I just try to figure out how to do things differently so it’s better for the environment.” Also making an appearance are Diaz’s Shrek the Third co-stars, who share what they’re doing to protect the planet.

Um, washing and reusing plastic wrap could actually be hazardous, as the polyphenols from plastic could leach into food with each re-use. No thanks, Cameron.
And the prob is, there are even better tips to saving energy, which she herself hasn’t thought of apparently. Therefore, I’ve compiled a list of environment-friendly rules for her:
1) Give up blow-drier use. Too much energy usage is bad for the environment.
2) The end of hair color and make-up. Harmful bleaches leech into the water AND the soil. Ditto for the make-up when you wash it off. Pollutes the water.
3) No more Hollywood movies. Those large studio sets use a lot of energy. And those lights and cameras. Oy, the energy they sap from our world.
4) You’re putting that manse up for sale. Right, Cameron? What? You mean there’s nothing wrong with heating and air-conditioning 5,000-plus square feet? And displacing those animals from their natural habitat in Malibu or Hollywood Hills or wherever? A big no-no, chickie. Time to move back to man’s original caves for you, my dear.
5) Must wear same gown or, at least, used clothes to every awards dinner/ceremony. Oh, I see. You didn’t realize the vast amount of energy used and environmental damage caused in order to create fabric, color your gowns? No more custom-made haute couture for you, hun.
6) No more condoms. Used latex pollutes the environment. They get into the sewers and water. So no more, whether it’s with Justin Timberlake or whatever flavor with which she’s sleeping, this week. In a giggly video interview on the National Geographic Kids site, Diaz urges all kids to follow her lead in donating their used running shoes in order to recycle the rubber in our world. Therefore, I urge her to follow suit with her used condoms. We hear she contributes her fair share to the Hollywood sewer and septic arena.
And that is anything but “green.”
And it’s a pollutant that surely contributes to global warming, child abuse, the War in Iraq, and every other malady in existence that she and her friends have blamed on conservatives. (You’ll recall that she told Oprah that if we don’t vote, rape will be legal in America; so, I’m just using her logic, though mine makes far more sense.)

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7 Responses

You forgot about her penchant for private jets….

MarySJ on September 24, 2007 at 8:35 pm

Perhaps all that hot air she and her friends espouse can be used for transportation using what else, hot air balloons.
On another unrelated comment, I hope your fast was an easy one DS.

warpmine on September 24, 2007 at 9:50 pm

Another environmentalist expert, a real genius from hollywood. *Groan*. Its very interesting how these celebrities are suddenly now global warming theorists. It tells me alot I need to know about their educational level which of whom most of them didn’t supersede passed high school.

Jew Chick on September 24, 2007 at 10:16 pm

The thing is, given their self righteous nature and self important pomposity, Hollywood celebrities feel that they can dictate certain life choices for us little people while living as royalty themselves. A must read for everyone who reads this blog and/or posts here is Do As I Say, But Not as I Do: Profiles in Liberal Hypocrisy, by Peter Schweitzer. This book explores the way prominent, extreme left wingers live in their own life. They live by behaving like conservatives, proving the intellectual bankruptcy of liberals. The thing is, they feel that they have reached their morally superior state of consciousness, so their hypocrisy is acceptable.
Diaz may eye candy (and she is hot), and may even drive Toyota Prius’s, but some gut feeling tells me her carbon footprint is ever so slightly greater than the average American. People like she and Al Gore make me want to buy an F350 King Cab and drive to the end of the driveway to get my mail.

JasonBourne81 on September 25, 2007 at 2:02 am

“There’s something about Mary”! The movie is over-the-top and disturbing just like Cameron Diaz. During her school days, she was nicknamed Skeletor by her classmates because she was so thin. Diaz has publicly admitted that she is germophobic and habitually sanitizes doorknobs before touching them. Me thinks there is NOT a much of a chance of Justin getting in there sans raincoat. DIAZ is a great role model for the kiddies! Was Pee Wee Herman unavailable?

FingerEleven on September 25, 2007 at 2:05 am

>> “Therefore, I urge her to follow suit with her used condoms. We hear she contributes her fair share to the Hollywood sewer and septic arena. And that is anything but “green.”
Whoa. I’d suggest that that could be v-e-r-y “green”….also black, purple, brown, fuzzy, and toxic, even to Zebra Mussels. Bleh!

Zoyadog on September 25, 2007 at 3:09 am

I bet Diaz has never followed one of those tips she mentions. Puhleeeeeeeeze, she’s never put plastic wrap over a bowl.
Just another former A lister trying to stay relevant.

Jeff_W on September 25, 2007 at 8:57 am

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