July 13, 2010, - 3:13 pm

You Won’t Believe This Animal Rights Absurdity

By Debbie Schlussel

Been meaning to get to this for some time because it’s so ridiculous.  Stuff like this doesn’t help the animal rights people’s cause.


When I go to critics’ movie screenings, they are often held in the luxury theater of a local cineplex (while other times they are in uncomfortable seats in an old office building or at a promotional screening with the general public who get free passes).  That theater has roomy stadium seating, and the seats, which resemble those in the above photo, are made of soft leather.

At a recent critics’ screening, someone was sitting on the stairs of the stadium seating in what looked like a very uncomfortable chair.  It looked to me like he was some kind of guard, preventing us from sitting in the upper seats–sort of like at your typical WNBA game, where they cordon off most of the upper seating and make everyone sit below for camera shots, so it makes it look like there is actually a big audience.  But this was a private screening with only a few people in attendance and, like most people at the theater, we watch in the dark. I asked the person sitting in the chair on the steps why he was sitting there.  He responded that he’s vegan and refuses to sit in any chair made from “anything with a face or that has kids.”

It’s a free country, and I believe everyone is free to do what he or she wants (though the chair on the steps is a fire and safety hazard).  He’s a nice guy and was minding his own business, until I asked what the deal was. (I asked because I’d never seen him before and really thought he was there to block me from sitting farther up, so I wondered about it.) And, in a way, I respect this person for being consistent with his beliefs, unlike the many animal rights phonies and other lefty hypocrites who tell us how to live our lives, but don’t do so themselves.

Still, this is ridiculous.  The animals were dead years ago, when the seats were made.  Not sitting in them won’t change that.  And the rewards or good works of self-torture by sitting in a very uncomfortable synthetic chair escape me.  Not a single animal was saved by that.  It won’t bring the animals, from which the soft leather was procured, back to life.  And no theaters are going to remove their leather seats.  The orthodoxy of it all is really pointless.

Like I said, he’s free to do what he wants.  And it really isn’t my business.   But since I saw it, I can’t help but notice the ludicrous degree to which some people will go for the sake of animal rights or other far-lefty causes.  And, sadly, with these movements, it doesn’t stop there. It never does. And that’s the real problem here.

A guy sitting in an uncomfortable chair isn’t the problem and doesn’t bother me. But they–the animal rights thugs–want it to bother me. They want to make me sit in those chairs, too. Today, they request their pro-animal seating arrangement.  Tomorrow, they impose that view on my seating.  And, then, it is my business.

I, too, believe in animal rights.  Right on my dinner plate, next to the carrots.  Right under my tush in the stadium seating at the movies.  Right on my feet.  Right on my waist and legs, when I wear leather skirts and pants.  And right on my back in the colder weather.  Very delish, very comfy, and very necessary.

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49 Responses

I love leather. I have an old, well worn, leather bomber jacker. And a winter coat made of sheerling. Bought a leather loveseat and leather recliner two years ago. My car doesn’t have leather seats, but my next one likely will.

Animal rights? The animals they came from were all domesticated, raised specifically for their meat and their hides. It was, if you’ll pardon me, their raison de’etre.

Raymond in DC on July 13, 2010 at 3:36 pm

“I, too, believe in animal rights. Right on my dinner plate, next to the carrots. Right under my tush in the stadium seating at the movies. Right on my feet. Right on my waist and legs, when I wear leather skirts and pants. And right on my back in the colder weather. Very delish, very comfy, and very necessary.”

DS, will you marry me?


That last paragraph was great.

Paul on July 13, 2010 at 3:42 pm

I love most animals; especially grilled. Yum.

Rocky on July 13, 2010 at 3:42 pm

The Animal “rights” crowd worries about furry little things, but I worry more about little HUMAN BEINGS. Animals were put on earth to serve us, and to provide sustinance. Human beings were put here to procreate. Killing our progeny ain’t smart, eating steak is smart.

codekeyguy on July 13, 2010 at 3:48 pm

Animals are renewable. All the demand for fossil fuels, (hmm, wasn’t that animals once too? ) products synthesized from them and the pollution they cause unnecessarily are probably a much greater offense to the Creator. Unnecessary use of FF products include any and all synthetic fabrics. Ewwwwww! Excepting certain industrial uses. Teflon coating on pots and pans, and just about any household item made of plastic.

mk750 on July 13, 2010 at 4:02 pm

Does this mean I have to give all my sweaters back, too?

Sarah Leah Lawent on July 13, 2010 at 4:13 pm

    unless they’re wool, which is taken from living animals, silk or cotton, why would you wear them in the first place? Synthetic fabrics pill, don’t breathe so you stink, and are hard to clean requiring more petroleum based products to get out stains.

    mk750 on July 14, 2010 at 6:26 pm

Next time, you should politely grieve with that vegan, and mourn the face of the naugas that you have been sitting on.

luagha on July 13, 2010 at 4:27 pm

Much of the animal rights movement lost me when they compared the killing of animals for food and clothing to the HOLOCAUST!!!! Are these people sick? The killing of a cockroach which carries germs, or the killing of rats is the same as the killing of a Jewish physician, concert violinist, or of children? Where do I begin in describing the moral bankruptcy of that comparison?

Second animal rights activists oppose all animal testing. Before I became a patent attorney, I worked in the lab. Regrettably animal testing is a necessity. There is not a computer model to test the effects of most drugs. None of these animal rights activists would volunteer to take the place of the rats and mice that were tested. I guess they knew that the difference between running tests on PETA and Animal Liberation Front people and running tests on the rats and mice is that we feel sorry testing rats and mice.

Jgrant on July 13, 2010 at 4:27 pm

Animal rights people are hypocrites. Go to the deceiver.com blog and read about all the PETA morons who tell you how bad fur is, but have no problem wearing leather.

Rocky Lore on July 13, 2010 at 4:39 pm

I have a leather chaise, couch, loveseat, and chairs. Its very comfortable. Leather shoes. Leather belt. And of course leather jackets!

The ultimate natural resource. Its just an irony to see leftists against the use of a natural product. Normally, they’d all be for it. Common sense can sometimes desert people.

When it does, it becomes my business!

NormanF on July 13, 2010 at 4:54 pm

Of course there are nuts among the vegans and raw foodists, and even those who are not this nutty have this irritating air of morality about them; always telling themselves how moral they are for not benefiting directly or indirect from ‘helpless’ animals.

But there are some vegans and vegetarians who are not wacky, who follow their diet primarily for health reasons. Not all vegans are the same.

Little Al on July 13, 2010 at 5:02 pm

Next time, please ask him if horseback riding is acceptable. Also ask him if it was acceptable for farmers to use oxen and mules on their farms before motorized tractors were invented, and how he feels about his own existence being owed to animals used for work on farms. I am very curious.

Fred Taub on July 13, 2010 at 5:17 pm

Animal Rights is just about the ONLY hold-out of my Liberal past. Sorry, I love them and love to help them.

HOWEVER, these whackos are just so silly. Oh, like DS I admire that the fool walked it like he talked it, but these animal rights freaks give true animal lovers a very bad name. They are like any socialist…want to dictate to us what we should do all the while elevating themselves on a lofty perch of self-rightousness and inhibiting our liberty. I often detest them more than the heartless peeps who can’t feel for animals (sometimes, one is just born with it).

That being said, I certainly am way more tolerable of freedom of choice for those who want to eat and hunt animals. I went from hating Ted Nugent with a passion to admiring him greatly. If every hunter was like Ted, it give the TRUE animal right activists something to really cheer about. This was NOT an easy transition.

Skunky on July 13, 2010 at 5:37 pm

you, madam, are truly a cunt.

Kevin McNamara on July 13, 2010 at 6:19 pm

    Oh YAY! No real credible brain power so you just drop the C-Bomb instead.

    Paul on July 13, 2010 at 6:48 pm


    Phreak on July 14, 2010 at 8:59 am

    You stay classy, Mo (kevin).

    As goes Israel - so goes the World on July 14, 2010 at 12:18 pm

This would have been a reasonable post without finishing it with the vapid Palinesque cliche: “I, too, believe in animal rights. Right on my dinner plate, next to the carrots.”

If the man doesn’t want to sit on leather (some of us realize… it’s dead skin… would you sit on dead human skin? Some people feel just as grossed out. I personally don’t), but what’s it to you, really? Why does that offend you?

Somewhere in the depths of your minds, you all know that you’re eating, wearing, and sitting on the corpses of creatures who didn’t want to die and didn’t need to die (though they did, and probably horribly, just because you enjoy those products). If you need to ridicule people for not sharing your desire for dead things, I think it says more about you than them.

In A Gadda Da Vegan on July 13, 2010 at 6:23 pm

I, too, believe in human rights.  Right on my dinner plate, next to the carrots. Mmmmm grilled debbie schlussel.

andrea on July 13, 2010 at 6:38 pm

actually if enough people refused to sit in those chairs the theatre would eventually be forced to change them and it would prevent other places from buying them. If it were leather from children that were killed in china for it – for example – would you sit in them and support that market? what if it were jews or slaves? then? takes good people to make a stand for anything good to happen.

fuckyou on July 13, 2010 at 7:07 pm

    “If it were leather from children that were killed in china for it – for example – would you sit in them and support that market? what if it were jews or slaves? then?”

    Ah, but it’s not then. Genius.

    And plants are living beings too. Think about that the next time you tear some poor living plant out of it’s home (the ground) by it’s roots, and then grind it up and eat it while it’s still alive.

    Phreak on July 14, 2010 at 9:02 am

These extreme vegans are hillarious. They should stop heating their homes and driving any type of vehicle with a petroleum based engine because that fuel was produced by now dead dinosaurs. They had faces and kids too.

You also find these same extreme people driving around in their puny little death traps powered by an electric engine and think they are doing this to save the environment – WRONG. They still have to juice up their cars, and a very large portion of our electricity comes from coal. Ooops, they are again using dead animals for their needs. And for all of you hybrid lovers, how can you drive these vehicles when the used dead batteries are going to be a huge waste disposal problem? You are going to have many more millions of old dead batteries that need to be disposed of properly and not enough companies to do this reclamation.

Jarhead on July 13, 2010 at 7:07 pm

Hey Vegans – guess what? Your clothes were made by using fuels that were produced from dead dinosaurs. You’d better start walking around naked. – On second thought, please don’t start walking around naked. The lack of meat in your diets has turned the color of your skin into a sickly looking color.

Jarhead on July 13, 2010 at 7:13 pm

I know a girl who’s been interested in me lately, and she supports animal rights. However she is one of the very few REAL common sense-type supporters, not these fakes who just says it and goes to the extremes.

She wouldn’t have any problem with me wearing a leather belt or a jacket.

Squirrel3D on July 13, 2010 at 9:26 pm

She would probably sit in chairs made of Muslims. Or seats made of young children working in Chinese Sweatshops.

If aliens took over tomorrow and decided to make Debbie a dairy “human” keep impregnating you, milking you, eating your babies and eventually you – you wouldn’t complain right. You’d make a great chair. After all, “might = right” according to you.

Like “War of the Worlds” spray Debbie’s blood everywhere, mmm tasty humans.

Sam on July 13, 2010 at 9:27 pm

BTW Whoever did your eyebrows and photoshopping of your pic – should be fired at once.

Sam on July 13, 2010 at 9:28 pm

Oh I LOVE it when the veggies get all riled up! You are some of the most hypocritical folks around. Rocky Lore is right – check out deceiver.com.

Angela04 on July 13, 2010 at 10:06 pm

“I, too, believe in animal rights. Right on my dinner plate, next to the carrots. Right under my tush in the stadium seating at the movies. Right on my feet. Right on my waist and legs, when I wear leather skirts and pants.”

How strangely arousing. :p

B in Toronto on July 13, 2010 at 11:53 pm

Angela04, a good example of animal rights hypocrisy would be Pamela Anderson, who poses for PETA, yet drive a car with leather and shills for Vivienne Westwood. And how about that Kardashian skank who has a boutique full of leather? And don’t get me started on the PETA models who wear leather to a PETA premiere! I check that site every day for more lunacy.

Rocky on July 14, 2010 at 1:28 am

I loved your last paragraph and enjoyed reading the article very much.

These types of people really irritate me. What would they think of God when He requested an animal to be sacrificed and the smoke was a pleasant scent unto him? what about after nakedness in the garden God himself slaughtered animals for skins to clothe the now “knowledgeable” Adam and Eve?

There is a place and a time for all things. Everything is to be taken if it be taken with thanksgiving said the Lord. Yes, we should protect what needs to be protected, but lets get real. These people have nothing better to do and have NO understanding of the process of life.

How many times would they stand up for other things that are more important? Not only that but are bugs, insects, or things that gross them out or they cannot see in lack of rights because they don’t like them? Hypocrites! The fact is no one has rights, not even humans. Life is gift, not a right! And as we all know gifts can be lost!

Amedeo Bianchi on July 14, 2010 at 2:30 am

I don’t think they truly want to protect animals nor feel they have rights. I think it is more the other way around. They cannot handle their feelings and emotions when it comes to anything that is more sensitive than they can handle personally. They want to have the “RIGHT” to speak out!

I wonder how many of them starving in a snowy, frozen, place with no food, but only animals- would not kill one to feed themselves and their family? Animals are here for that reason! Wake up! Would they let their kids and family die because they think the animal has more of a right to live than the family/children?

Amedeo Bianchi on July 14, 2010 at 2:36 am

If some people don’t want to use leather, or eat meat, or fish or fowl well they have all the right in the United States to do so. They can forgo the comfort and warmth of leather, the taste of a medium rare steak or a nice B-B-Q chicken. Fine, no problem. But that’s where it ends. They have no right to impose their particular demons on me or my family. Today it’s my choice of food or material, but tomorrow it might be my choice of religion or school or auto or congress critter. We have freedom of choice in our country. You animal rights activists, vegans, environmentalists and whatever else is out there should not impose their views on others. That’s not democracy, that tyranny.

kenny komodo on July 14, 2010 at 8:24 am

Meat is murder.
Tasty, tasty murder.

ender on July 14, 2010 at 12:40 pm

“He responded that he’s vegan and refuses to sit in any chair made from anything with a face or that has kids.”

Well, that must mean that Janet Napolitano would be alright then.

Worry01 on July 14, 2010 at 3:31 pm

“Animals were put on earth to serve us, and to provide sustinance.”


I guess people like you were put on earth to amuse the rest of us, then. :°D

REPTILIANSEVERYWHERE on July 14, 2010 at 3:44 pm




Bob Porrazzo on July 14, 2010 at 5:32 pm

The author has served many purposes. A reminder of how much education the world still needs as well as a reminder that the opinions of self-important people with keyboards are pure comedy. It seems more of a shock piece to get reactions (I hope) but sometimes staring right at ignorance/intolerance is healthy for those of us who get comfortable thinking that the world is changing faster than it is.

lulu on July 14, 2010 at 6:36 pm

Too bad PETA types don’t expend HALF the time and resources helping PEOPLE.

Then again, most of them leave that up to the government.

This means neither will be helped to the full potential.

Sam Adams on July 14, 2010 at 7:20 pm

Debbie – I think you’re awesome.

But do you have to pick on the vegetarians? They’re just trying to live a compassionate life. Nothing wrong with that.

Zsuzsi on July 15, 2010 at 3:05 pm

Those who espouse animal rights feel morally superior about not eating meat, or not wearing leather, etc. Those who espouse human rights feel morally superior about not owning slaves. Those who espouse equal rights for women feel morally superior about not tolerating abuse of women. And so on. That’s what taking a moral stance on ANYTHING implies: that with respect to that particular issue, you believe your position is morally superior to the contrary position. Those who don’t feel morally superior about anything simply have no moral values. So criticizing animal-rights advocates for feeling morally superior is nonsensical.

Do animal-rights advocates want to impose their values on you? Of course, just as human-rights advocates or women’s-rights advocates want to impose their values on you. That’s what society does when it passes laws: it imposes values on you. Democracy is a particular way of deciding how values get imposed on us.

Here’s an essay by David DeGrazia of George Washington University for anyone who might want to get beyond the knee-jerk “meat, yum” reaction and think about the arguments behind animal ethics:

Mijnheer on July 17, 2010 at 10:51 pm

Reducing the suffering of animals is a noble and worthy endeavor. Setting up straw-men by using the most extreme examples so you can ridicule those who simply want to reduce suffering serves no purpose I can see. Complaining that PETA, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, doesn’t promote human welfare is asinine. Their mandate is to help animals! Members of PETA who want to help people donate time and resources to the proper organizations to achieve those goals. Some posters here seem to imagine some socialistic bent of people who wish to reduce animal suffering wherein they would dictate to you how live your life. What paranoia! Do yourselves a favor and stop alienating good people who share your belief in wanting to maintain a free society.

One can care about animal welfare and care about our western ideals. I donate to Geert Wilders. I donate to the Humane Society of America.

(And if you think leather is the same as fur I challenge you google “Chinese fur farms” and watch three videos in their entirety. If you have any heart at all you will have a difficult time comprehending the ghouls that can slice and peel the skin off of an alert dog.)

Roark on October 3, 2010 at 8:28 am

Who has been trying to “impose” his views on you?

Did the man try to push you out of your leather seat; did he curse at you for sitting where you sat?

Who exactly has been trying to force you to change your way of life? More on that would definitely be appropriate in a article like this.

Mike on October 27, 2010 at 7:21 pm

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