January 23, 2011, - 7:14 pm

HILARIOUS: Headline of the Day

By Debbie Schlussel

This is from yesterday’s print edition of the Detroit Free Press.  Rip Hamilton is a multi-millionaire . . . and yet he still hasn’t learned to speak English.  Hey, I hear this qualifies him for an innovative new DEA job, in case that pro basketball thing doesn’t work out in the long term.

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26 Responses

If Rip plays for the Detroit Pistons, I don’t know. I do not have the time to watch professional athletes play the way that I did when I was a kid. Being a blue collar man with several college degrees, I have to watch my pennies as America struggles through this Democrat caused Great Depression.

I have no sympathy for professional athletes. I also see numerous people who cannot read or write.

Pat on January 23, 2011 at 7:40 pm

Don’t mock the poor afflicted Negro. for he knows not what he says.

#1 Vato on January 23, 2011 at 9:38 pm

For me, Dennis Rodman ruined anything I ever liked about the NBA. The bar is set so low that the class players are hardly noticed.

Dee Brown, a former Fighting ILLINI wrote on his blog (while playing for Maccabi Tel Aviv) that he was living a dream; playing a GAME for a living.

You can see where people like Rip Hamilton are going. I think guys like that have a lot in common with some of those lottery winners you wrote about recently. They don’t understand or comprehend Gd’s blessings.

If you want to hear a class act, listen to Dikembe Motumbo’s post-game interview after he went down with a season-ending injury. NBA players used to be much more “kid-friendly”. Today, too many are just nobodies with basketball skills and too many tatoos.

There is NO Santa Claus on January 23, 2011 at 10:14 pm

Good Lord. I have to record that statement to use in my future novel — it’s priceless.

batyah on January 24, 2011 at 12:45 am

Calhoun of the University of Connecticut should be proud. He “attended” UCONN, but it doesn’t say if he graduated. Maybe grammar was to be taught in his senior year.

JeffT on January 24, 2011 at 8:35 am

Where is our modern-day Barbara Billingsley “Airplane” character to help us understand “stupid”?

Pats on January 24, 2011 at 8:55 am

All too common…..standard English with proper grammar would be acting white.

Duck on January 24, 2011 at 9:46 am

LOL! His name ought to be Rif (Reading is fundamental!). What a dummy. He’s prolly proud of his illiteracy. What a shame.

I doubt that the embarrassing headline will humble him or shame him into using the noggin God gave him. ‘Til then, it’s fun to laugh at arrogant idiots.

Skunky on January 24, 2011 at 10:25 am


    Well, he was taught the fundamental three R’s in the public schools: Round balls, Round hoops, and Rap music.

    Pats on January 24, 2011 at 11:21 am

Reminds me of the horrible english skills of Earvin “magic” Johnson. He eventually lost his game commentary gig due to absolutely terrible speech skills that were perfectly acceptable to him. I don’t remember if he graduated college or not. He shouldn’t have graduated junior high.lol

samurai on January 24, 2011 at 11:17 am

Let’s try this again, Rip. “Nobody said anything to me about it”.


Tanstaafl on January 24, 2011 at 12:46 pm

An above poster said, “Don’t mock the poor afflicted Negro. for he knows not what he says.”

Yep, it’s embarrasing. But Rip also just signed a three-year $34 Million contract. As an NBA player, he has the money, the women, the cars, the fame, and the clothes. With the continuance of such “affliction”, does he really have any incentive to learn standard english?

Ida P Wells on January 24, 2011 at 2:14 pm


    Doc Cady on January 24, 2011 at 3:41 pm

I think he’s the future Allen Iverson, bad apple.

Truth on January 24, 2011 at 2:48 pm

Typical. Someone once told me “I ain’t hear you!” I wonder if this person is related to RIP (Rest in Peace ) Hamilton.

Todd on January 24, 2011 at 2:51 pm

Years ago I worked in a bookstore in Newark, NJ.
A very well-dressed gentlemen asked me if we’d had a certain title in stock.
I knew that this particular title would be assigned to someone studying for a master’s degree…..which meant that this man had already earned his bachelor’s degree.

Our conversation went like this:
Me: I’m sorry sir. This title isn’t in stock right now.”
Him: “Y’all don’t be havin’ it?”
Me: “….No sir.”
Him: “When’a y’all be havin’ it?”

…college material…

I’ve also heard this one several times:
“Y’all onna pose-a-be doin’ at.”
Translation: “You’re not supposed to be doing that.”

“Y’all got a case-quarter?” is also quite common here in the northeast.
It refers to a 25-cent piece, as opposed to 2 dimes and a nickel….or 5 nickels…
It means that the 25-cents is in its own ‘case’.

You might also be asked: “Y’all got a ink-pen?”
Why not simply ask for a pen, you say?
Because……if you merely ask for a pen, without saying the word ‘ink’, then the person might think you’re asking for a (wait for it)….safety ‘pen’…or a clothes ‘pen’…or a hat ‘pen’…

No…..I am not making-up any of this.

Guitarguy on January 24, 2011 at 4:26 pm

    G-guy: Thanks for the explanation. I’ve always wondered about the origins of the term “ink-pen.” I’ve always thought it was stupid, BTW. I mean, what other kind of pen would it be?

    DG in GA on February 4, 2011 at 4:58 pm

very few american negroes take the time to speak proper english. They sound so stupid and ignorant when they speak i wonder how they could even function in day to day life. I think most negroes are simply lazy and figure someone else will take up the slack. maybe this is What MLK meant when he said “I HAVE A DREAM”. I dream of the day when we blacks won’t butcher the queens english.

charles on January 24, 2011 at 5:17 pm

It’s black separatist behavior, common among black racists. They don’t speak properly, because they think it’s “white”. They want nothing to do with the Caucasian population, their manner of speaking, their cultural norms, their laws, nor anything else they do. All they will accept is their money. Got it?

spiffo on January 24, 2011 at 5:58 pm

I’d like to hear what Bill Cosby has to say about “Rip”.

Dr Dale on January 24, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Years ago, I saw a British woman was on a local talk show. She said, “You know, when Americans hear me speak, they think I speak with an accent. But it’s not an accent. It’s the sound of English being spoken CORRECTLY!”

Hilarious. So Charles, there are those out there who think YOU are stupid and ignorant because of how you sound. So please be careful on how you judge others, because you will be judged the same way.

And Spiffo, I had no idea you were such an expert on African American socio-cultural and psychological norms, and that you are so academically astute on the subject that you’re able to put all Black people under one umbrella based on the utterances of a professional basketball player. Wouldn’t you be more at home on another Website…say one like Stormfront?

Denmark Vessey on January 25, 2011 at 12:18 am

“Hillary Ain’t Never Been Called A N***er!” Sorry, couldn’t resist. That headline reminded me of what takes place at 1:53 here:


Now is that any way to talk about Obama’s secretary of state? At the very least, somebody should politely remind this gentleman that “ain’t never” is a double negative.

Irving on January 25, 2011 at 2:28 am

I guess this is Ebonics in action.

Worry01 on January 25, 2011 at 3:31 am


I am quite astute about African American socio-cultural norms, actually, and I did not put all blacks under one umbrella. I said common among black “racists”. Are all blacks racist? Of course not. You’re accusing me of words and thoughts I did not write, only what you desire to interpret. “Stormfront”? I am not familiar with that site, but you’ve got your preconceived notions all tidy for a life of blissful ignorance, so have a good time.

spiffo on January 25, 2011 at 1:00 pm

Dear Debbie,

Please tell me what could motivate you to put DebbieSchlussel.com on every pic? I see absolutely no benefit and it’s a distraction from the storyline. Plus bloggers like me like to replicate pics free of advertising. Elsewise we have to edit it, which as you must know is time consuming.

richardporter on January 25, 2011 at 8:51 pm

    You’ve answered your own question. Debbie does not like to be ripped off. Few bloggers do. Is it not proper to give credit and link back to the source when you “borrow”?

    This reminds me of another practice I find annoying, lazy, and childish and that is posting on someone’s blog just to get traffic for one’s own blog. It usually goes something like this, “If you really want to know about (fill in the blank) go to my blog: http://www.watchmepullaflamingmonkeyoutofmyass.com (not a real blog;).

    Richard on April 26, 2011 at 7:57 pm

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