June 28, 2007, - 10:35 pm
By Debbie Schlussel
Every season in its miserable, money-hemorrhaging history, I’ve written an attack piece on that Weird Nuisance Brought on America, that Waste of National Broadcast Airtime, that fake basketball played by 7’2″ she-males who still can’t slam-dunk, otherwise known as the WNBA.
This year, however, Season Eleven of the NBA’s Political Correctness offering to the Butch Cassidys of the Women’s Sports Foundation, didn’t get a special posting or column from me. That’s because, like most of America, I barely noticed that the season existed, just like I don’t notice an ant urinating on the sidewalk or someone getting a paper-cut, three towns away. Plus, I got tired of beating a dead horse. Or is that a dead dog?
Hard to tell, given the boneheaded but enlightening advertising campaign that WNBA teams–desperate for an audience–are now enlisting. Since they couldn’t attract mainstream American sports fans, then they couldn’t attract enough families to watch females with brushcuts caressing each other on the sidelines, and now they can’t make it on lesbian and gay fans, the WNBA is trying a new tack. The league is now targeting your dogs. Who was the marketing genius that thought up an ad about dogs in conjunction with a league known for the underwhelming appearance of its female performers? Just askin’.
And since it would be mean for me to comment on the unlimited amount of female dog and bitch jokes and double entendres, I won’t do that. Instead, I’ve posted, above, the ad that WNBA teams ran Sunday around the country, inviting dogs to attend the games as VIPs (PETA will be proud). I’ll let you think up and insert your own lines. . . .
Weird Basketball, Season 11.
Hilights of my past anti-WNBA produce: here, here, here, here, and here. All of them still apply today, and I think you’ll appreciate the humor.
And I’d be remiss to forget the F-U e-mail from a WNBA Coach (real b-ball coach Lute Olson’s Granddaughter) and the op-ed piece against me by a WNBA player.
Tags: advertising campaign, America, basketball, coach, Debbie Schlussel Every, Lute Olson, National Basketball Association, NBA, real b-ball coach, WNBA Coach, WNBA player, Women's Sports Foundation