September 24, 2007, - 1:27 pm
By Debbie Schlussel
Okay, so he’s not the real King of Pop, they just share the same name. And the same lack of any experience whatsoever in law enforcement. Instead, this Michael Jackson is the King of Flop–well, the Deputy King of Flop, anyway–at the Department of Homeland Security. He announced he’s resigning from his perch atop Homeland Security as the real-life Smithers to the real-life Mr. Burns.
He says he needs to make more money than the $200K-plus in benefits and salary that he already collected for doing . . . well, not much. He’s the guy that announced the inconsistent and silly liquid policy along with TSA chief Kip Hawley. Also, the guy that sent out BS “upside” memos when surveys came out showing DHS employees rated DHS lowest of any government agency. Hung out with Chertoff when their eager subordinate Emilio T. Gonzalez gave himself an award for best immigrant. Stuff like that.
Hard to believe he can find more money and a better job than the phony one he occupied courtesy of Uncle Sam. Like all the other top dogs at DHS, he had zero law enforcement experience when he came there, and it showed in spades. He was a lobbyist and bureaucrat. That’s where he should have remained.
Michael Jackson, Deputy Secretary of Homeland Security, was the deputy overseeing so much incompetence at Homeland Security, it was really hard to tell which Michael Jackson was actually running the place: the Black-turned-White Michael Jackson from “Thriller” or the White-from-birth unthrilling Michael Jackson.
Frankly, I liked the movie version (the hot Jack Scalia) of the Deputy Secretary of Homeland Security (from “Red Eye”) a whole lot better. And I bet that actor would have run the place a whole lot better than the actors that are there now.
Good riddance, Michael P. Jackson. Say “Hi” to Germaine and Tito for me on the way out. Now, if only you would take the Serpenthead and The ICE Princess with you.
Tags: actor, Debbie Schlussel Okay, Department of Homeland Security, Deputy, Deputy King, Deputy Secretary, Emilio T. Gonzalez, Germaine, Jack Scalia, King, Kip Hawley, law enforcement, law enforcement experience, lobbyist, Michael Jackson, Michael P. Jackson, Princess, Red-Eye, Secretary, the King, Thriller, Tito, TSA chief, USD