May 30, 2006, - 10:23 pm
American Farm Held Hostage, Day 14: Farm Finally Freed From Capitivity, No Hoffa Found (As Predicted Here)
By Debbie Schlussel
We called it 14 days ago, when we accurately predicted the FBI would NOT find Jimmy Hoffa in its latest silly incarnation of “Desperately Seeking Jimmy.”
Today was DAY FOURTEEN of the FBI siege on an American Farm in search of Jimmy Hoffa. And, fortunately, after 14 days in captivity, the FBI finally freed the Hidden Dreams horse farm from the hostage situation, ending its Hoffa search escapade. After two weeks, the FBI finally saw the absurdity of this incredible waste of taxpayer dollars and resources in search of a body they will never find (and as we’ve written, even if they found it, so what?!).
But before the silly search was ended, we were treated to the empty humor of FBI spokewoman Dawn Clenney, who joked about taxpayers paying overtime to workers digging up the farm on Memorial Day weekend. “We’re the FBI. We doze, but we never close.” Haha, Dawn. You’re so punny.
In addition to the overtime, the two weeks of digging up the Milford Township, Michigan horse farm in search of Hoffa “achieved” the following results by the Famous But Incompetent (we refer to FBI management, not the street level agents):
* A $1 million taxpayer tab on the dig up of a Michigan farm for Jimmy Hoffa;
* 50 FBI agents plus assorted K9 dogs, anthropologists and archeologists (and they thought they’d be exploring African ruins and pottery; instead it’s a dung-filled horse farm);
* A barn and its cement floor destroyed and removed by the FBI (will taxpayers have to pay to replace it?); and . . .
STILL NO JIMMY HOFFA.
AMERICAN FARM FINALLY FREED–AFTER 14 DAYS IN FBI CAPTIVITY.
(More information on this hostage count, here.)
Tags: cement floor, Dawn Clenney, Debbie Schlussel We, Federal Bureau of Investigation, Haha, Hidden Dreams horse farm, Jimmy Hoffa, Memorial Day, Michigan, Michigan farm, Michigan horse farm, Milford Township, search escapade, silly search, spokewoman, USD