September 22, 2010, - 11:09 am
A few weeks ago, KFC–the politically correct moniker now used by Kentucky Fried Chicken–decried the dying image of “Colonel” Sanders, also known as Harlan Sanders, the late, white-haired, goateed founder of the fast-food restaurant chain. The company whined that surveys show most younger consumers, aged 18-25 couldn’t identify Sanders and those who can think he’s a made up character. Worse, the company’s same store sales have fallen. So, how is KFC remedying these problems?
KFC wants folks to watch its backside. Or, more precisely, the backsides of female college students it’s recruiting to promote its hot new bunless Double Down sandwiches.
Women on college campuses are being paid $500 each to hand out coupons while wearing fitted sweatpants with “Double Down” in large letters across their rear ends. . . .
The program began last week at Spalding University in downtown Louisville. The chain plans to expand it to at least three more campuses. The additional schools and the women there will be picked via a Facebook promotion.
Chicken on “buns.” Get it? Haha, funny. Ba-dump-bum-ch.
Everyone knows that sex sells, but this isn’t about feminism. It’s one thing to sell products with a sexy woman. It’s entirely another to sell food with someone’s ass. There’s a very distinct line between sexy and skanky, and KFC deliberately crossed it. You don’t have to be a prude to know that this is a low-life stunt, and it won’t put more people inside KFC stores . . . at least not in the long-term. There is already one “Hooters.” If KFC wants to become the next one, it can say good-bye to its image as a quick, low-cost meal for families. Clearly, there is a reason that people are leaving KFC, and a college chick’s butt won’t change that.
For the record, since I keep kosher, I don’t eat–and never have eaten at KFC, since the only kosher KFCs are in Israel. But the last thing I’d want to think about in connection with eating is someone’s butt. To me, the association is that KFC food is equivalent to what comes out of one. KFC . . . Food That Comes Out of Her Ass? Regardless of that, it’s a gutter move that won’t pay off for KFC, and, like I said, while it might–briefly–get young male butt-obsessed college students in the door, it won’t work. And it will turn off other KFC customers. I don’t need to join KFC in the sewer and use any of it’s “Finger Lickin'” phrases in association with rear-ends to demonstrate the problem. KFC would have been best advised, “Don’t go there.”
When I got my MBA, I majored in marketing, and I and three students I worked with won national awards for putting together ad and marketing campaigns for big-name products, including Rogaine. I know a little something about how to do an effective campaign. This ain’t it.
Now Available on a College Co-Ed’s Butt
Poor Harlan Sanders. The guy was a great American entrepreneur who struggled for most of his life. After several failed ventures, the guys started Kentucky Fried Chicken in his late 60s and finally made it when he was in his 80s (that’s when KFC became a success and he sold it). After death, he’s been savaged by everyone, including bimbo Pamela Anderson. And now, his own former company is slapping his image on someone’s rear end.
You stay classy, KFC. Colonel Sanders is turning over in his grave.
Tags: ass, butt, co-ed, Col. Harlan Sanders, Col. Sanders, college, Colonel Harlan Sanders, Colonel Sanders, fast food, food, Harlan Sanders, Kentucky Fried Chicken, KFC, marketing, promotion, rear ends, skanky, sleazy