February 16, 2012, - 12:55 pm

Outta Control Whitney Worship: Pan-Muslim Christie Lowers the Flag for “Hero” Houston?! The Jokes

By Debbie Schlussel

I don’t know about you, but I’m long past sick and tired of the absurdly excessive Whitney Houston news and worship of what was essentially a crack whore who once had a great voice and a lot of talent.  I’m sure that Chris Christie chubby-chaser Ann Coulter will find a way to excuse the pan-Muslim, liberal Republican New Jersey Governor’s lowering the flag to half -staff for Houston, but it’s just appalling.  I’m completely with the mother of the fallen Marine who is angry about this.  This woman was no hero.  She wasn’t a soldier who died in the service of America.  She was a low-life who descended from great opportunity, talent, and success to drug addiction and a sleazy reality show.  I lamented her death on my site because I was once a fan.  But I mentioned her failings with equal zest.  And enough is enough.  It’s been nearly a week of this crap, already. Can’t we move on to the next whacked out celeb who dies of drugs? You know there’s more where that came from.

Crack is Whack . . . and so Is Chris Halal Chrispie-Creme

Check out this excerpt, below,  from my 2005 post about her and then-hubby Bobby Brown’s reality show, “Being Bobby Brown,” and then ask yourself if Chris Christie should have lowered the flag to half-staff for this whack-job.  Remember that at the time they filmed this show, their daughter, Bobbi Kristina, was only twelve years old but was the only relatively sane and mature person in the “family,” or, rather, the crack coven.  Some of the “highlights” of the show:

* Brown bragging how he once had to dig fecal material out of Houston. Sick, sick, sick! (He goes into more graphic detail than we will here.)

* When Houston and Brown go to their bedroom mid-day for sex, after Brown gets out of prison (for one of the following: violence, substance abuse, failing to pay child support for multiple out-of-wedlock kids), daughter, Bobbi Kristina, cries, “Let me in!” Brown doesn’t allow the daughter in, but does allow in the cameras.

And there’s much more. Read the rest.

The excessive praise of this woman and her beatification to sainthood by the media is ridiculous. And now Chris Chrispie-Creme is in on it, too. Christie’s excuse is that Houston is a “cultural icon of this state.” Hmmm . . . I wonder if the Governor of the home state of Ron Jeremy will use the same excuse when he dies (and please, no jokes about how Jeremy wouldn’t want the flag at half-staff). Um, she’s a “cultural icon” because people like Christie continue to give this tragic figure a hero’s honor, despite how she lived. Even Rick Santorum, for whom I now plan to vote in the Michigan Primary on February 28th, talked about her. It’s sad when Presidential timber sinks to wade into the Whitney morass, though he had a good take on it–that, sadly, celebrities are our new aristocracy and have too much impact on American society. Even sadder is that fame-seeking prosecutors are already looking to go after her doctors, just like with Michael Jackson. Doesn’t the addict ever bear any responsibility?

And, while we’re at it, I’ve noticed the dearth of good Whitney death jokes. Too soon? Not for me. On Monday, I asked my friend, movie critic and comedian Corey Hall, why I hadn’t heard any Whitney jokes. He told me it’s because comedians have to care one way or another about the topics they joke about, but that most of them couldn’t care less about her. Still I found a few on the web, most of which I can’t repeat here (because people will cry “racism!” or they are just too gross), except for this one:

Q: What do Whitney Houston and the Titanic have in common?

A: One cracked before going down, the other smoked crack before going down.

Ba-dum-bum. Ch-.

What are your best Whitney Houston jokes? And should a Governor of ANY state ever lower the flag to half-staff for an entertainer, especially Whitney Houston?

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70 Responses

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