November 27, 2013, - 3:48 pm

Happy Chanukah (Not “Thanksgivukkah”) in the Age of Dumb Iran Deals & Jews the Maccabees Would’ve Beheaded

By Debbie Schlussel

Tonight, at sundown, the first day of the Jewish holiday of Chanukah begins. (Yes, it’s also spelled Channukah, Chanukkah, Hanukah, Hannukah, Hanukkah, and in several other ways as a result of Hebrew-to-English transliteration which isn’t an exact science, something I’ve covered on this site.)


Jewish U.S. Combat Unit Soldiers in World War II Celebrate Chanukah in the South Pacific Battlefield (Photos by U.S. Army Private Mack Gould) . . .

As you may have heard, it is also the first time since 1888 and the last time until the year 79811 that Thanksgiving and the first day of Chanukah coincide. That’s led to an, at first, cute and, now, totally annoying marketing gimmick in which several companies and some (mostly secular) Jews are pimping products bearing the name “Thanksgivukkah.” To me, it’s a stupid thing, especially since most of the people touting this are Jews who are far left, very secular, and know very little about Judaism, nor will this increase that. One kid invented a “menurkey,” a menorah (the Jewish candelabra we light on Chanukah) that is shaped like a turkey and isn’t even a kosher menorah, so it would not fulfill the Jewish requirement of lighting the menorah candles on Chanukah.

I’ve been asked by various readers and friends how I will celebrate “Thanksgivukkah,” and my response is that I don’t celebrate that fictional holiday. I celebrate both the Jewish holiday of Chanukah and the American holiday of Thanksgiving. But they are separate holidays marking separate and different things. One, Chanukah, is a religious, spiritual holiday, celebrating many miracles, including the incredible Jewish military victory of the Maccabees against the Assyrian-Greeks, who vastly outnumbered them, and the fact that a jar of oil to light the menorah candles in the Jewish Temple lasted eight days when there was only enough oil for one day. The other, Thankgiving, is a national holiday in thanks for the existence of our great country, its freedoms, and the many blessings bestowed upon us as Americans. If anything, the Pilgrims modeled Thanksgiving harvest celebrations on the Jewish Sukkot (or Tabernacles) celebrations.

And what galls me is that most of the Jews pimping me on this Thanksgivukkah baloney are liberal Jews and Obama voters and who have said and done nothing in protest of Obama’s absurd deal with the modern day equivalent of the Assyrian-Greeks: Iran. We live in a time of darkness, and they don’t get it. We have the greatest technological advances, cheap and easy clothes and accoutrements, plentiful food, and conveniences galore. But those are all window dressing when most of the world’s powers have made a deal with the devil, a one-sided deal in which we get nothing and the Iranians get everything. And there are no Maccabees to do anything about it. These Thanksgivukkah Jews are the modern-day Hellenist Jews, whom the Maccabees would slaughter in great numbers as they did the Hellenists. What most Jews don’t realize is that the Maccabees, while they killed the Greek soldiers and defeated King Antiochus Epiphanies, fought for years–more than two decades!–to reclaim Judaism and Israel and Jerusalem and the Temple, and most of those whom they had to fight and kill were Jews. These were the Jews who’d turned against Judaism and embraced the Greek materialistic lifestyle and idol worship. The Maccabees slaughtered tens (and maybe hundreds) of thousands more Jews than Greek soldiers. And they would have slaughtered these Thanksgivukkah Jews for the most part. These are the Jews In Name Only (JINOs) who like Jewish culture and foods, but they have no spiritual connection to me or the Torah. They need gimmick Judaism, just as they fell for a gimmick President. Style over substance on steroids. And that is the very definition of the Hellenism that was the antagonist and evil in the Chanukah story.


I guarantee you the father of that kid who trademarked and invented the non-kosher Thanksgivukkah menorah, the “Menurkey” (and the father paid for all those expenses), voted for Obama. And I guarantee you that he and his family would have been beheaded by the Maccabees. All of these Jewish groups–including to my great distress, the Orthodox Union, which is supposed to be the lead organization representing Orthodox Jews–have resigned themselves to this horrible agreement with Iran and refuse to oppose it, vehemently or otherwise. Yup, no Maccabees they. In fact, they are the modern-day equivalent of the anti-Maccabees. Wimps. Wusses.

We’ve made an agreement with Iran which forces them to do nothing. They are allowed to continue funding Hezbollah, which murdered hundreds of American Marines and U.S. Embassy workers and officials as well as Navy diver Robert Dean Stethem, and to continue to refuse to apologize to America for these murders or for holding our Americans hostage for 444 days in Tehran in 1979-1981. They are allowed to continue torturing and murdering political prisoners and Jews and Christians whose “crime” is practicing faith. The Iranians are allowed to continue executing gays and to financing Shi’ite terrorist fighters in Lebanon, Syria, and elsewhere and to fund Shi’ite rebellions from Dearborn, Michigan to Saudi Arabia’s Qatif Peninsula to Bahrain and elsewhere in the Gulf. Iran gets to continue its proud funding of HAMAS. And Iran continues building its Hezbollah satellites throughout Central and South America and throughout Africa. And Iran has said it will continue to enrich uranium and build plants which can only be used to complete its nuclear weapons aim.

In exchange for this nothing that we “get,” Iran gets a whole lot. The country is welcomed back into the international community with open arms and they get all kinds of economic incentives. Iran gets gazillions in U.S. goods and, yes, AID! The embargo that barely was is now completely non-existent. And any Iranian suffering because of it, is now over. Plus, Iran gets to sell its oil on the open market, unfettered. Cha-ching! Funds that America froze are now returned to Iran. Yet, in some cases, these funds were frozen in order to pay American hostages, victims of the TWA Flight 847 hijacking and murders, and American and other victims of Hezbollah and HAMAS terrorism it funded. These victims and their families are now the losers and victimized all over again. Thanks, Obama Epiphanies, King of American political Hellenism.

Maccabeean times minus the Maccabees we desperately need. Yesterday’s Hellenism is today’s Miley Cyrus/Kardashianism plus Obama Epiphanies as the King. As I said, we live in dark times, and American Jews are too “comfortable” to see it, just as secular German Jews were too comfortable to see things back in Hitler’s emergent day. And today we are embracing the Hitlers of Iran with kudos to ourselves, pats on the back for a treaty–an agreement–worthy of the emperor’s new clothes. And the treaty is as substantive as the non-existent garments.

Every year, I try to post pictures of American soldiers during World War II celebrating Chanukah. Those soldiers fought the forces of darkness and evil, and they triumphed because America did not deal with the enemy and willingly get tricked. Nope. We smote the enemy. Those soldiers, today, would be disgusted, but most of their grandchildren are deluded in the comfort that they voted for Obama. Those soldiers risked everything to fight and beat the enemy. Today, we embrace that enemy at all cost and eat something on the Farsi menu and smile.

So, as I light the first candle on my menorah tonight, marking the start of the first night and day of Chanukah, I will celebrate the Maccabees’ victory over Greeks and the Hellenists . . . and especially the Hellenist Jews. But I will lament that the victory, all these centuries later, sadly, didn’t last.

And we need a whole lot more miracles. I hope G-d is listening.

Happy Chanukah to all my Jewish friends and readers!


More on Chanukah:

As Jewish holidays go, Chanukah is a minor one. It is not on the level of Christmas, though it’s been artificially been elevated to that status by lazy parents (generally the Hellenist Obama voter types) and eager marketers and retailers. Back in Europe and Israel, parents never gave their kids gifts for the holiday, just “gelt” (gold–usually gold coins).

While it lasts eight days, we work and go about our business on those eight days except while the menorah candles are burning. We light candles on the menorah (Jewish candelabra) in progressive numbers on each night–one for the first night, two for the second night, and so on. We also light another candle each night which is known at the shamash. It is the candle used to light the other menorah candles, and it is required to be higher than the other candles, which are required to be all of the same height. The candles are required to burn at least a half hour.

On Chanukah, it’s also custom to play a game with a spinning top, called a dreidel. The dreidel has four different Hebrew letters on each side, which are the initials for a Hebrew phrase, Nes Gadol Hayah Sham, which means, “A Great Miracle Happened There [Here, if you’re in Israel].” And as I noted above, we eat the latke potato pancakes. In Israel, they eat sufganiyot–jelly-filled donuts.

Chanukah is the story of the few against the many–-the few Maccabees, led by Matthew [Matityahu, and then, after his death, Matthew’s son, Judah [Yehudah], who fought against oppression by Greek-Assyrian (Seleucid) King Antiochus Epiphanies and miraculously beat him and his army, which far outnumbered the Jews. As I mentioned, it’s the story of the one jar of olive oil which miraculously lasted eight days–the amount of time it took to make more jars–in lighting the menorah [candelabra] in the Jewish Temple in Jerusalem. All other jars had been destroyed or made impure by the Greeks, and it was the one jar that miraculously survived intact. Above all, Chanukah is about the age-old, repeat fight of the Jewish people for religious freedom.

Again, it must be remembered that the most of the bloody fights and slaughter the Maccabees had to carry out were not those of their Greek-Assyrian enemies, but those of their fellow Jews, whose behavior could have meant the end of Judaism. While I don’t advocate that today–or violence of any kind, the Maccabees showed no mercy toward these ignoramuses who embraced the enemy, toward these eager sell-outs. And anyone and everyone who celebrates Chanukah must celebrate that as well or they simply aren’t observing the holiday and what it’s all about.

The Maccabees were warriors. They were strong, and they had no fear. They’d easily take out any of those who, today, mock Jews as weak. We weren’t weak then. Only the Hellenists were, and their modern-day imitators are the weak ones in our community.

Chanukah was about how peace and survival of the Jewish people was achieved through battle–through a war fought by a group of brave, valiant Jewish men who fought not only against the enemy without, but the enemy within.


Check out “My Big Fat Cool Menorah Collection“!

Check out my documented moving stories of how Jewish U.S. Soldiers celebrated Chanukah while they were fighting in World War II in Europe and the South Pacific.

Again, to all of my Jewish readers and friends, I wish you a spiritual and meaningful Chanukah. I hope the holiday has the same meaning for you that it does for me–of victory over those who would destroy us.


Chanukah Dreidel

26 Responses

Happy (hold on, let me clear my throat) Channukah! How unusual that it coincides with my favorite nonreligious holiday, Thanksgiving.

Alisia S on November 27, 2013 at 4:23 pm

Always appreciate the military photos too. Thst generation wad much stronget than we are. We’re like spoiled babies compared to them. The sacrafices they made… awesome!

Alisia S on November 27, 2013 at 4:26 pm

Readers might be interested to know there is a new book on the history of Chanukah in the U.S.:

Hanukah in America
Dianne Ashton
New York University Press

It just came out.

Re Iran, the Republicans have also been spineless, to the extent they have even criticized the agreement. Most whoa re critical at all say that it is a stratagem to divert attention from the Obamacare mess.

While I am sure the Administration welcomes the diversion of any attention at all away from Obamacare, this agreement has its own dynamic. Kowtowing to the Muslim Brotherhood, other Muslim tyrants, and other tyrants and anti-Americans all over the world has been a hallmark of this administration. While Obama’s predecessors also showed these tendencies, they have been accelerated under Obama, the worst president since FDR.

The Republicans are getting a twofer: criticizing the deal for the record, without having to go into its substance or implications.

Little Al on November 27, 2013 at 4:35 pm

Oh, well look on the bright side, just think about how many brownie points Jews are scoring with the Alinsky-ite leftists by not kicking up a fuss. not.
Happy Channukah & Thanksgiving Debbie.

Frankz on November 27, 2013 at 5:37 pm

We don’t have the Maccabees anymore.

Israel’s leaders are afraid of crossing Obama and risking their comfortable lives to stand up for the very Judaism Iran’s Grand Poobah Ali Khameini only last week denounced as the “rabid dogs of the region” and he dehumanized the Jews at their most vulnerable.

Jews take this insult to their heritage bent over backwards and they do nothing. They shame their ancestors, who were willing to risk their lives, their honor and their faith in G-d to stand for something greater than themselves. Hellenism now runs modern Jewish life and no one seems to care about Jewish survival.

But when we read the story of Hannukah, we realize that just when there is no hope and the darkness is about to sweep over everything and extinguish the Jewish people, there are a brave few who do take a stand and they change the course of history by their example. It doesn’t seem like that now with Iran triumphant and Israel isolated but I do believe that somewhere the descendants of the ancient Maccabees will emerge.

Above, the lesson of Hannukah exemplified by the lights of the menorah, is that spirit of the Jewish people, despite all their trials and numerous enemies that beset them – will never die. And the light of Judaism and its devotion to G-d will remain exalted through time.

NormanF on November 27, 2013 at 5:39 pm

Happy Chanukah, Happy Thanksgiving and God Bless you, Debbie, for your tireless vigilance and reporting.

DS_ROCKS! on November 27, 2013 at 5:41 pm

to those who don’t know the score,
“You a gangster now. On the other side. A whole new ball game. You can’t learn about it in school, and you can’t have a late start.”

Frankz on November 27, 2013 at 5:56 pm

Keep up the great work Debbie!

Your words are inspirational and give to many the needed reassurance they are not alone.

Happy Chanukah, and Happy Thanksgiving.

Johnny on November 27, 2013 at 9:25 pm

Happy Chanukah to all non-Modern Day Hellenist Jews. I take some comfort that DS feels the despair I do. And there is a screaming, Christian equivalent going on these days. The Pope happens to be a problem. I should have known when he agreed to meet Mugabe. Dark days, indeed.

I’m more than happy to take the side of the proper Jews and relish being against evil Islam.

The history of this column was fascinating and I appreciated it. No wonder to understand the Bible proper you have to know Greek. When I did some Bible study I learned that there were MANY secret clues/keys (for lack of better terms…) like a puzzle that made it quite clever and believable. That was fascinating to me and the 8 days of olive oil reminded me of how it all comes back together. I gotta find another bible scholar who also knows Greek so I can learn those “clues”, “keys” to the puzzle. You’re missing out on bible study if you miss those clues.

So many are blind today in 2013. Very depressing.

Skunky on November 27, 2013 at 9:34 pm

    Pope as a problem indeed, Skunky. Especially now that he has stepped out of the Pope’s Box in talking down capitalism. How much money does the Vatican have? How much money does the Catholic Church in America have? How much land do they own? Talk about capitalism!!!

    Skunky, do not rule out the great possibility that THIS Pope may indeed be The AntiChrist.

    Alfredo from Puerto Rico on November 27, 2013 at 10:19 pm

    Yeaa, Skunky, I fee for ya. He’s a Jesuit and a South American Liberation Theologian to boot. But I’ve always said that the Vatican is going to meld with Islam and become the One World Religion at some point. I’m not talking about grass roots Catholics, I mean the hierarchy.

    Meira on November 28, 2013 at 3:26 am

    This pope is a dope. The media is very enthusiastic. He’ll oversee the disintegration of the Catholic Church and while that may not bother some it’s very bad news because of the vacuum it will leave.
    Contrary to the sales hype this won’t invigorate the Church. They’ll dissolve like aspirin.
    He’s already making waves against soft targets like Capitalism.
    Will make teeny tiny ripples (if that) about 100 0000 Christians a year(church’s own figures) martyred in Muslim countries. I think he declared them martyrs but that’s often a convenient way putting people out of sight.
    This is the situation today. The Church accepts its status as a photo shoot theocratic monarchy. That is now the role it plays with mutual dependency on the media.
    To make sentimental public gestures like washing convicts feet that are wonderful on a personal level and compliment their feel good international policies.
    This pope is an undertaker with a silly smile.
    “A very simple man” in many more ways than one and probably too simple for the job but not too simple to play ball. As is the fashion for “leadership” today.
    The last pope was “surrounded by wolves”. Now I know why.
    No offense to Catholics if there are any out there who care what I say or think but that’s my take on it.

    Frankz on November 28, 2013 at 4:40 pm

I can’t guarantee it, but I think it’s reasonable to expect that there simply will NOT be a United States of America in the year 79811. Our country is dying and our people are partying like it’s 1999.

There is NO Santa Claus on November 27, 2013 at 9:56 pm

As I commented on a previous post recently, our government has no clue, being ignorant of Islam, that Muslims – whether Shi’ite or Sunni – use Muhammed’s treaty with the Quraysh, known as the Treaty of Hudaibiyya, as the basis for all treaties with infidels, particularly where military or war-related issues are concerned. Arafat referred to this treaty some years ago, when he addressed an Arabic-speaking audience wary of his participation in peace talks with Israel. His referral to Hudaibiyya was to reassure his audience that any peace talks with Israel were a sham. The Treaty of Hudaibiyya was agreed to by Muhammed to buy time for the Muslims, who needed to rearm and strengthen their military capabilities in their war with their chief adversary, the tribe of Quraysh. Once Muhammed felt that these goals had been achieved, he broke the treaty using a pretext and resumed fighting, this time to total victory over the pagan Quraysh, with Muslims and Islam now supreme. As all of Muhammed’s behavior is considered worthy of emulation by Muslims, and as Hudaibiyyah had profound historical consequences, the significance of this treaty to Muslims cannot be overstated. On the other hand, the basis for treaties among or between Western (and other non-Muslim) nations is Pacta sunt Servanda, where all parties involved are understood to adhere to all terms of the treaty in perpetuity, and in good faith. Muslims cannot, for religious reasons alone, subscribe to this where infidel nations are treaty signatories. Furthermore, Muslim law allows only hudnas, or temporary cease-fires, with infidels, the length of the hudna not to exceed ten years; after this period, the hudna must either end, leading to a resumption of warfare (i.e. jihad), or be renewed. In either case, the hudna was established, along the lines of Hudaibiyya, to allow Muslims to buy time to build up military strength, or increase their strategic advantage in other ways, so that jihad can proceed with greater facility against infidel enemies. Kerry and his negotiating team almost certainly know nothing of any of this, but would likely not even care, being intoxicated by their own delusional self-importance. So here is yet another reason, and a very important one, why this “treaty” with Iran is an utter disaster.

commonsense on November 27, 2013 at 10:03 pm

    Very well put, common sense.

    skzion on November 27, 2013 at 11:08 pm

      Thank you, skzion. I forgot to note that the Saudis’ extreme concern over this matter is in large part driven by their full awareness and understanding of Hudaibiyya’s significance. Sunni and Shi’a Muslims may unite at times against a common enemy – the Kafir – but geopolitical as well as religious factors keep Muslims fighting each other nonetheless, and those in the House of Saud rightly view the Iranians as a threat. The Iranians wish, ultimately, to establish a Shi’ite Caliphate and establish hegemony over all of the Arabian Peninsula, an objective requiring their development of a nuclear arsenal.

      commonsense on November 28, 2013 at 11:30 am

    What do you mean the government doesn’t understand Muslims?
    Obama attended a Muslim school in Indonesia ,for years, registered as a Muslim. His chief adviser is Valerie Jarrett, a native born Iranian. Hilary Clinton’s chief adviser is Huma Abedin(Weiner) an Egyptian and leading family of the Muslim sisterhood,(the female wing of the Muslim brotherhood). Everthing Obama has done is carefully planned and fully understood. He has an agenda and it is Anti-American and pro Muslim. The White House is full of Arabists and Anti American traitors.

    Paul on November 28, 2013 at 3:43 pm

      Paul: I appreciate your comments. I am very concerned about Huma Abedin, who is very probably familiar with Hudaibiyya, and her ties to the Brothehood, but I don’t know if she was consulted in regard to the Iranian deal. (As a Sunni, she may actually have been against it.) Jarrett was born in Iran, it’s true, but she was apparently not a Muslim and the Shah was in power while she and her parents lived there. Presumably, she is ignorant of Hudaibiyya. Obama may have learned little of Muslim history while he attended a madrassa; I assume, although I may be incorrect, that he spent most of his time there memorizing passages of the Koran, with little understanding of what those passages mean. In any event, it behooves him as president to have knowledge of Muslim geopolitical strategies, even if it has to come from his advisors. As you say, he may not even care about such things, as American supremacy and security are not of paramount concern to him. And, as you aver, there are others, probably many others, in his administration whose influence is significant and pernicious, such as the execrable Dalia Mogahed – google same.

      commonsense on November 28, 2013 at 10:00 pm

Alisia S on November 27, 2013 at 4:23 pm
“my favorite nonreligious holiday, Thanksgiving.”

Mine too, but non-religious? So who are we giving thanks to?

BTW, as soon as I heard about this “Menurkey” my first thought was DS. I knew she wouldn’t like the smell of it. Neither do I.
So sick of our Holidays becoming prey to phony capitalism. All these manufactured holidays taking over ours is pretty disgusting. All you hear in the media is ‘black friday’ and the like and now this combined holiday crap. Liberal capitalists ruining my Holidays, get off my freakin’ lawn! Go find some other place to defecate. Make up your own “holidays” but leave ours alone you bastards!

Oh, and Happy Channukah AND a Happy Thanksgiving Deb and all.

theShadow on November 27, 2013 at 10:04 pm

Leave “Thanksgivukkah” to those left-wing nitwits who are so bankrupt in knowledge and morality that they do not even regard the difference in meaning behind a holiday of religious faith and one of national pride. While both involve prayer and reflection, their thoughts are no deeper than candles and turkey so they combine the superficial and celebrate a day of emptiness.

Forget them and have a very happy Chanukah, DS, and a happy Thanksgiving.

And wear some good boots in case some dolt tries to spew Obamacare propaganda at the dinner table.

Brian R. on November 27, 2013 at 11:35 pm

“Again, to all of my Jewish readers and friends, I wish you a spiritual and meaningful Chanukah. I hope the holiday has the same meaning for you that it does for me–of victory over those who would destroy us.”

Thank you, Debbie. And you do the same–as well as all other–Jewish readers here as well as anyone else here who celebrates the holiday.

And the holiday does indeed have that same meaning for me.

JeffE on November 27, 2013 at 11:44 pm

Wishing you and all of your readers a richly satisfying Chanukah, Debbie. You have such a huge heart and it always shows in your warrior spirit.

Andrew on November 28, 2013 at 2:23 am

A reminder why DS is indispensable reading.

We trust and have faith in HaShem and with the IDF.

bobguzzardi on November 28, 2013 at 9:27 am

Chanukah Sameach Debbie!
I am reminded of the battle cry of the Maccabees”Who is like thy nation Israel” This was also the symbol of the Warsaw Ghetto uprising in 1943.

PaulaMalka on November 28, 2013 at 10:36 am

The first night of Chanukah began on Wednesday at sunset. Thanksgiving Day did not begin until midnight. So Thanksgiving does not completely coincide with the first day of Chanukah this year. Thanksgiving coincides with about 17 hours of the first full day of Chanukah.

NormCBS on November 29, 2013 at 1:37 pm

When talking about the Maccabees and JINOs, I must quote something said two thousand years ago but is just as true today. This is especially true for all of the JINOs in the US government who stabbed Israel in the back with this “deal”:

“A nation can survive its fools, and even the ambitious. But it cannot survive treason from within.
An enemy at the gates is less formidable, for he is known and carries his banner openly.
But the traitor moves amongst those within the gate freely, his sly whispers rustling through all the alleys, heard in the very halls of government itself. For the traitor appears not a traitor;
he speaks in accents familiar to his victims and he wears their face and their arguments, he appeals to the baseness that lies deep in the hearts of all men. He rots the soul of a nation, he works secretly and unknown in the night to undermine the pillars of the city, he infects the body politic so that it can no longer resist. A murderer is less to fear.”

Cicero Marcus Tullius
106-43 BC

jimmyPx on November 30, 2013 at 8:39 pm

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