July 3, 2007, - 1:25 pm
The Hypocritical Summer of Ted Nugent
Am I the only one who’s sick and tired of the hypocritical ventings and lecturings of Ted Nugent? Am I the only one who sees through this rocker-with-no-clothing? Are conservatives so desperate for a D-list celebrity that they will overlook all to embrace Ted Nugent? Apparently so.
Today’s Wall Street Journal features an op-ed piece by Nugent, who likes to refer to himself as “Uncle Ted.” The piece, “The Summer of Drugs,” is three columns of Nugent bloviation and braggadocio about how he never did drugs on the rock scene in the ’60s and ’70s (a point a lot of bigger name rockers who toured with him dispute) and what a great moral guy he is because he was not like the rest of the ’60s generation.
Ted Nugent: Portrait of a Hypocrite
All fiction, since Nugent–a Draft Dodger–divorced his wife, used his rock star money to gain sole custody of the kids, lived with a teen groupie who raised the kids (he was too busy touring), cheated on his second wife, Shemane, and had a kid outside of wedlock with Karen Gutowski of New Hampshire, with whom he fought against paying child support for years.
**** UPDATE, 02/17/09: That’s in addition to the two other kids Ted Nugent had out of wedlock with two other different women by the time he turned 21. That’s right. Ted Nugent fathered SEVEN kids with FIVE different women, to which only two of whom he was married. ****
It’s hilarious to read “Uncle Ted” Nugent moralizing to us in the Journal, including these passages, since he’s not exactly the ideal utterer of them:
Turned off by the work ethic and productive American Dream values of their parents, hippies instead opted for a cowardly, irresponsible lifestyle of random sex, life-destroying drugs and mostly soulless rock music that flourished in San Francisco. . . .
A quick study of social statistics before and after the 1960s is quite telling. The rising rates of divorce, high school drop outs, drug use, abortion, sexual diseases and crime, not to mention the exponential expansion of government and taxes, is dramatic. The “if it feels good, do it” lifestyle born of the 1960s has proved to be destructive and deadly.
I agree with all of these things, but can’t hear them coming from Ted Nugent. From him it sounds more like “The Nudge,” instead of another one of his favorite self-monikers, “The Nuge.” It’s too much Nugent saying, “Do as I say, not as I do,” especially since his battle to avoid paying for his illegitimate kid was just two years ago. (Everyone falls for his phony act, though, since Nugent was once named “Father of the Year,” by some ignorant group.)
And here’s how he got out of serving in Vietnam, where many of his fans died fighting. From a July 15, 1990 Detroit Free Press Sunday Magazine profile:
And he is equally proud that the Michigan Legislature this year proclaimed him a “wholesome, traditional” man of “honesty, integrity, loyalty and patriotism.”
But Nugent wanted no part of Vietnam. He claims that 30 days before his draft board physical, he stopped all forms of personal hygiene. The last 10 days, he ingested nothing but Vienna sausages and Pepsi; and a week before his physical, he stopped using bathrooms altogether, virtually living inside pants caked with his own excrement, stained by his urine.
That spectacle won Nugent a deferment, he says, although the Free Press was unable to verify his draft status.
“The men who went should be applauded, but if I would have gone over there, I’d have been killed, or I’d have killed all the hippies in the foxholes . . . I would have killed everybody.” [DS: In other words, let them do the job for me, while I rock and lounge over here in safety. Whatever, Ted.]WITH HIS WORRIES ABOUT THE draft out of the way — “I never heard from them again” — Nugent focused on his band.
And don’t forget this from the New York Post in 2004:
Courtney Love phoned into The Howard Stern Show on Monday (March 22) before eventually coming into the studio where she made the shocking allegation that one of the first times she had oral sex was with Ted Nugent. She said she was young and she didn’t want to say exactly how old she was, but eventually confessed she was 12-year-old – which would have made Nugent approximately 28 years old at the time. The New York Post attempted to contact Nugent for a response but was unsuccessful. Moderators at Nugent’s official forum deleted the only thread asking about the topic as evidenced by the forum’s search giving a file not found error for the matched thread. She added it was a long time ago and she didn’t even have breasts yet.
Ted Nugent also likes to call himself “the Motor City Madman” (he has a lot of bloated, self-important nicknames). But Ted Nugent moralizing to the rest of America as if he’s the opponent–instead of the embodiment–of ’60s morality doesn’t have a thing to do with the Motor City. It’s just plain Mad.
(Given all this, it’s notable that Sean the Plagiarist Hannity likes him so much and features him so much on his cable and radio show. Well, at least, I know this is one thing I’ve written that Vannity won’t be plagiarizing anytime soon.)
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