February 12, 2010, - 5:15 pm
As you know, Sunday is Doghouse Risk Extra-Avoidance Day (DREAD) for American men, or what many conventionally call, “Valentine’s Day.” I think my moniker for it is far more appropriate because–I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again–there ain’t nothin’ romantic about it. Unless taking orders from Hershey and Hallmark, on how to conduct your relationship, is sexy. It isn’t. Valentine’s Day is an obligation men obediently and harriedly complete–buying cards and chocolates or flowers or getting dinner reservations–in order to stay off their significant female others bitchy side. And that’s about it. It isn’t spontaneous, caring, or heartfelt. It’s a dreaded obligation. Any woman who thinks otherwise is, well . . . not thinking. There’s a reason heterosexual men spend almost twice as much as straight women to sate their significant other on this day.
I wrote about this extensively, last year. Here’s an excerpt:
It’s a forced day. By forced, I mean that most men aren’t buying women chocolates or flowers for their wives or girlfriends or taking them out to dinner because they want to. It’s because they have to. It’s an obligation, period. Not an expression of love. Don’t fool yourself into naive notions otherwise.
So what did I want to do? Well, last year, Valentine’s Day a/k/a “Doghouse Risk Avoidance Day” fell on a weekday, on a workday. I happened to be at a CVS near my home between 5:30 and 7:00 p.m. I laughed as I watched the steady march of a crowd of men on their way home from work, trudging through CVS–without happy looks on their faces–looking for cards and chocolate or other candy. None of ‘em looked like they wanted to do it. But if they didn’t, they’d be in the doghouse with their women. This was their last chance, the last outpost before a trip to man’s best friend’s humble, dark, cold abode.
Is that really what women want? A forced expression of obligation? Well, if you like Valentine’s Day, that’s basically what you’re getting. There’s nothing wrong with romance. But, for the most part, for men, Valentine’s Day is an obligation, not romance. . . .
What these guys were doing all day long before they got to CVS–struggling to make a living, put food on the table, and, likely, to support a family–is the real love they show every day of the year. Any woman who puts any one of them in the doghouse despite all of that–because he didn’t buy chocolate or a card on top of it–well, she’s missing what’s really happening.
Read the whole thing–it’s like verbal comfort food for men. Guys, I feel for ya.
Tags: American men, Avoid Doghouse, Doghouse, Doghouse Avoidance Day, Doghouse Risk Avoidance Day, Doghouse Risk Extra-Avoidance Day, DREAD, Love, men, not romantic, obligation, Romance, romantic, taking orders from Hershey and Hallmark, Valentine's Day