February 15, 2010, - 11:13 am
Silent Blob, Hollywood Hypo: Stop Whining, Fat Director Kevin Smith; Go to the Gym (& You’ll Get to Fly)
Count me not among the masses of idiots, who are sympathetic to the weekend “plight” of multi-millionaire “Clerks” director Kevin Smith. The dude is fat. Pursuant to Southwest Airline’s policy that overweight people have to buy two tickets, he was kicked off a flight by the captain. Yes, he originally bought two tickets, but then he decided to go on an earlier flight and didn’t buy two tickets for that one, because the flight was full and only one seat was available. Then, the captain kicked him off, pursuant to Southwest’s “Customers of Size Policy” (yup, that’s really what it’s called). That’s the breaks when you’re huge. And he’s whining on Twitter–and everywhere else–about it, complete with a ton of F-bombs (in well over 50 tweets and counting and in an hour on his website). You stay classy (and obese), Kevin.
So sad, too bad. Unfortunately, Southwest is apologizing all over the place and the slobbering, slavish entertainment press is kissing his butt about this, too, as if it’s a terrorist attack on poor, innocent, (not-so) little Kevin. Psychology Today is accusing Southwest of “weightism.” PUH-LEEZE. Private businesses and individuals in America practice weight discrimination every single day (and it’s a good thing). Sadly, we’re practicing less and less of it. Would you hire fat physical trainers for your gym? Academy Award nominee (and likely winner) Gabourey Sidibe, who is unhealthy to the max, is now the new “role model” for teen girls.
Kevin Smith: Wanna Sit Next to This Fat Dude on a Flight?
It’s hilarious how up in arms everyone is over the airline’s treatment of a rich, loud-mouthed fat guy, versus how silent and unenraged they were over the appalling bestiality sex scene, er . . . “interspecies erotica,” which he put in in his horribly disgusting and depraved “Clerks II” movie (read my review). Gotta love the sense of priorities and perspective of the Hollywood crowd and Smith’s gushing, brainless, lumpenidiotariat followers. Sorry, but I can’t cry for Hollywood limousine liberals when they get treated like everyone else. Add to that how I find it disgusting when fat people who are morbidly obese try to squeeze themselves into one seat, and then their blubber overlaps on top of your arms and lap. Yuck.
Smith should have bought the second ticket for the switched flight. Add to that the fact that in his movies, he never casts fat chicks (unless you count himself and Ben Affleck). So, he’s a hypocrite. Southwest Airlines doesn’t force him to cast fat chicks in chicks’ roles in his movies (like the Rosario Dawson role in the “Clerks II”). Why is he whining when he can’t force Southwest to put fat people in one seat? Look who’s, um, “weightist,” now. This is a guy who’s made a mint off an industry in which being thin is a priority for aesthetic reason. And yet he has the nerve to castigate another industry where weight is an issue for safety and business reasons? Kevin Smith is literally a hippo-crite (misdpelling and pun intended).
Remember what happens when an airline allows a really fat guy to buy just one seat? Check out this photo. It’s not Southwest’s fault that Silent Bob is really Silent Blob. I repeat what I said then: humane airlines make fat people buy two tickets. Period. They don’t make you squeeze in next to Kevin Smith.
Here’s a tip, Kevin: Southwest doesn’t tell you how to cast your movies. Don’t tell it how to fill–or avoid overfilling, with your fat butt–its seats. If you don’t like being treated the same as the “little” (but fat) people, fly on one of those fancy private jets, you folks in Hollywood usually fly and which you could charter. You can well afford it, just as you can well afford two tickets . . . unlike the average fat American who cannot.
Stop whining and try the gym. You need to lose some weight, Silent Blob. And get back to the Silent part. We miss it.
Again, you don’t cast fat chicks in your movies. Why should Southwest seat fat directors on its flights?
Tags: Clerks, Customers of Size, Customers of Size policy, F-bombs, fat, fat people on planes, hippo-crite, Hollywood hypocrites, Kevin Smith, kicked off flight, morbidly obese, obese, Persons of Size, persons of size policy, Southwest, Southwest Airline, Southwest Airlines, too fat to fly, Twitter, two tickets, weightism