September 1, 2010, - 4:37 pm
There’s something perverse about far-left multi-millionaire George Clooney playing something called, “The American,” in the movie of that title, in theaters, today. The guy has little to do with most Americans, little in common with them. And the same goes for his character, the promiscuous professional hitman who is the hero in this movie, who seems more arrogantly European than anything. I like a good hitman murder thriller. This ain’t it.
When we first see the smug Clooney in this very slow, very boring movie, he’s on a bed with one of the several sexy, naked brunettes who populate the film. They look like Bond girls, but I’ve never seen such a boring movie about crime, murder, and hitmen. So beautiful and stylish, but while it’s high on style, it’s near empty on substance. And it’s sooo predictable, it’s like every ’60s and ’70s movie which might have been clever then, but now seems like, “huh, is that all there is?” Been there, seen that a million times. It seems like the movie’s only purpose is to show us lots of Euro-trashettes’ naked butts and breasts . . . and bash Catholic priests, because–ya know–there isn’t enough of that going on and we wouldn’t dare bash the real villains in Europe (Islamic imams) ‘cuz that wouldn’t be decent.
Oh, and also it’s a chance for George Clooney to play a smug, arrogant, smarter-than-everyone, self-centered, aging pretty boy who hates commitment. In other words, George Clooney gets to play a challenging role: George Clooney.
Clooney’s hitman kills some “Swedes” who come to kill him at a snowy getaway. After he kills them, he calls his boss–an evil, aging European based in Rome. He tells him about the attempted assassination, and is sent to a small, rural Italian hillside village to chill out. There, he meets a friendly, decent Catholic priest, and Clooney shoves it in his face that the priest may have fathered a troubled mechanic in town. And, of course, that’s “far worse” than Clooney being a hitman “hero,” repeatedly bedding a prostitute at the local brothel, all while he is developing a special gun for a future murder to be committed by someone else.
I love it how Hollywood liberals find a way to show us that a murderous hitman who has sex with prostitutes is the moral superior of a kindly priest who might have made a mistake way back when. Yeah, you keep tellin’ yourself that, George. And why does the movie go out of its way to show us what appears to be a “Special Forces” tattoo on his arm? Is this supposed to be some sort of statement about the brave men fighting for America who actually served, unlike George Clooney?
I hated–and struggled to stay awake during–this smug, pretentious, self-righteous bore. Even the sex scene with a prostitute was stupid. Dumb movie, little story, a total waste of time . . . unless you’re in love with George Clooney, as in the guy looking in his mirror. Yup, a total vanity flick.
Exit question: Do Italian women in small conservative Catholic towns walk around topless with just transparent chiffon covering their bare breasts in winter? Didn’t think so.
This movie isn’t “American” at all. In fact, like I said, it’s very European. If you waste your time and money seeing it, I wish you, “Good Night and Good Luck.” Sadly, you’ll have neither.
Watch the trailer . . .
Tags: anti-Catholic, anti-Christian, George Clooney, Movie Reviews, Special Forces, The American