February 22, 2008, - 4:53 pm

Weekend Box Office: Dumb as Hell “Be Kind Rewind,” Great “Vantage Point,” Bloody & Pointless “The Signal”

By Debbie Schlussel
The only movie I recommend this weekend is “Vantage Point,” a pleasant surprise. The others annoyed and/or sickened the hell out of me:
* “Vantage Point“: Read my complete review. Wow, finally a movie from Hollywood in which the terrorists are Islamic and unsympathetic. The signs that they are Islamic are subtle but definite. It’s heart-pounding and thrilling once the move abandons its “Groundhog Day” replay of the same events and gets going. Dennis Quaid is always a charmer, especially when he’s one of the good guys and the hero of the story. Fifty-something never looked so good. Again, read my complete review.
* “Be Kind Rewind“: This is probably the dumbest movie of the year, perhaps the decade. Plus, I needed an interpreter to understand the Mumblish spoken by annoying Black Muslim rapper Mos Def. Gee whiz. Def plays a clerk at Danny Glover’s inner city video store. The store doesn’t rent DVDs, just videos.

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An annoying nutjob, played by Jack Black, hangs out at the store. He’s so nuts that when he tries to destroy an electric power generator plant, he’s electrocuted. Suddenly, every videotape in the store is blank because of his electromagnetic properties. Def and Black decide to shoot amateur versions of major films along with a clerk at the local dry cleaners. Suddenly, the whole city is lined up to buy and view these stupid videos.
I’m making it sound way, way, way better than it actually is. Even my 8-year-old nephew would have written something more entertaining and complex. Looks like a nursery school kid wrote it, including the dialogue. And it was extremely boring. I fell asleep like three times and still didn’t miss a thing.
A complete waste of time, money, and brain cells. Be kind to yourself and skip this idiocy.
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* “The Signal“: A mysterious signal that interrupts TV, phone, and radio broadcasts is turning people mad all across a major city. They are killing others. A young, working-class woman’s husband kills a number of people, as she tries to find her extra-marital lover, the man of her dreams, amidst the chaos.
At first, this looked like a cool horror thriller with no-name actors. But it soon degraded into a pointless, bloody, sick, macabre mess on the order of “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” After an hour, I walked out on this piece of trash. Blecch. Skip at all cost.

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5 Responses

Vantage Punt was the most corny, cheeseball, sappy movie I’ve seen all year. At one point the audience started laughing because the acting was so bad! An eight year old girl took a bullet for her mother recently right in the eye. A geriatric Dennis Squid takes a bullet in his protective vest and goes all PTSD popping pills with every cliche imaginable. This turd is so bad that only the gang signs flashed afterwards by the audience showed any signs of promise for real action. Wow, how ridiculous can it get! Every human in this picture acts like a chicken trying to cross the road. If you waste you money on this movie you will laugh at the stupid plot and nonsense. At one point SQuid is hit by a truck and “Chuey from La Puente” jumps out and says “Que Paso?” It is like some silly Mexican Tele-Sopa!” Debbie, sorry, but you need to get out more.

code7 on February 22, 2008 at 10:03 pm

on top of that, look where Be Kind Rewind was ripped off from http://youtube.com/watch?v=5geC6TcKM7U

sultan_knish on February 23, 2008 at 7:34 pm

The Signal sounds like a rip-off of Steven King’s Cell (which was a pretty awful book itself). Is it?

kishke on February 23, 2008 at 8:34 pm

I wish I read your review before taking my son and his friend to “Be Kind – Rewind”. WORST MOVIE EVER! I apologized to them for wasting their time.

Paul on February 24, 2008 at 4:54 pm

Vantage Point was a good movie. Definitely not a great movie. Yes, it was hard to determine that the bad guys were Islamic. The average audience member will probably think they were Spanish.
Anyway, there was lots of action, all which takes place in a relative small section of the city. There were plenty of holes in the movie but the action and unfolding of the plot make it a decent movie that I will watch again (at home).

BWR on February 24, 2008 at 6:02 pm

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