October 9, 2008, - 11:18 pm

No You Di’in’t: Another Feud I Wish Would Never End

By Debbie Schlussel
Yet another ongoing bitter verbal tiff to add to my “Feuds I Wish Would Never End”. This one is probably the dumbest and most petty, among very stiff competition. Call it, “Alieness v. Predatorette, No You Di’in’t Edition”:

The Queen of Soul is in high dudgeon. Aretha Franklin, who expressed her displeasure in February after Beyonce referred to Tina Turner as “the queen” during a salute on the Grammy Awards, is now fuming over remarks by her royal rival.

Alieness v. Predatorette, No You Di’in’t Edition:
Aretha Franklin v. Tina Turner . . .

arethafranklin.jpgtinaturner.jpg

Turner, currently on tour, was silent when Franklin dubbed Beyonce’s remark “a cheap shot for controversy.” Asked to comment in a USA TODAY interview last week, Turner said, “She’s the queen of soul, and I’m the queen of rock ‘n’ roll. There were so many kings and queens there that night. Her ego must be so big to think she was the only one.” She joked, “That’s how queens are!”

I think the more accurate term here is “drag queens.”

One queen wasn’t laughing. In a statement to USA TODAY, Franklin says Turner “clearly was talking about herself” in terms of ego.
“I never figured her to resort to tacky press just to sell a few tickets,” says Franklin, who adds she has never met Turner. “I really had put her in a different class – higher than that.
“No one has been more gracious . . . to their peers than I have, and I am confident and secure enough to do so, unlike some others.”
Turner did not respond to requests for comment.

Let me tell you a little some’in, some’in about the “gracious” Queen of Calories, er . . . Soul. Aretha Franklin is the queen of gazillionaire pop stars who rip people off and don’t pay their bills. She’s been the subject of countless Detroit media stories about the gazillion lawsuits against her for not paying her bills. Even her accountant had to sue her for non-payment, after he was hired to handle her bills. But as you can see, she, herself, ain’t goin’ hungry.
It’s one thing if you’re an average Michigan citizen struggling to survive in a tough Michigan economy and can’t pay, but this woman is loaded and has no excuse other than she just doesn’t feel like it.
Oh, and there’s that ritzy contemporary mansion she owned in swanky Bloomfield Hills, Michigan. . . the one she apparently got her son Teddy to burn down, probably for the insurance money. He was caught running in the middle of the neighborhood in the middle of that night with accelerant all over his body. But both of them got away with it because of incompetent prosecutors who chose not to charge her, along with incompetent Michigan Attorney General Mike Cox, who was too busy persecuting divorced fathers to charge the Franklins.
A couple of years ago, I saw Teddy Franklin in court, yet again, this time for receiving stolen property (bicycles worth over $1,000), and his and his mother’s high-priced attorney didn’t show up. His bill must not have been paid, either. It was a comedy of errors, since Teddy Franklin told the judge he works for mommy Aretha on her tour and then referred to “my problems with the house and the fire.”
Yes, Aretha is definitely the queen of something.
Feuds I Wish Would Never End:
Aretha Franklin v. Tina Turner . . .

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Baba Wawa v. Star Jones . . .
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Dr. Death, Baba Wawa & Star Jones Swimsuit Edition

HAMAS v. Fatah . . .
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Donald v. Rosie . . .
donaldtrump2.jpgrosieodonnell2.jpg

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12 Responses

Dang you Debbie, Star Jones butt broke my monitor.

Jackson Pearson on October 9, 2008 at 11:54 pm

Don’t forget Samurai, Doc, 1shot1kill, and I vs. Audacious. That was a good fight! Too bad Audacious gave up.

bhparkman on October 10, 2008 at 1:08 am

“He was caught running in the middle of the neighborhood in the middle of that night with accelerant all over his body.” …unbelievable
that Ms. Caloric Intake and her lap dog son have
continued to get away with these crimes.
Total and absolute low lifes!

kaps on October 10, 2008 at 1:57 am

Bh, maybe audacious odeed on some crack. He just disappeared.

samurai on October 10, 2008 at 2:25 am

Great piece Debbie–hilarious on these luxurious mamas–but so true. Aretha is so gross–the queen of soul and the queen of lard–I wonder how she has gotten away with screwing so many people over–she is in Denny McLain’s low class hall of shame. Both have made a career of screwing over anyone/everyone they can–and both have max out at many buffets–obviously–lots of cheeseburgers and shakes.
Still if you ax me, I would nominate the Rev-rund Jesse Jack-sun and the Rev-rund Al Sharpton for their jealous comments of his messiah-ship–Lord Barack Hussein Obam–(most magnificent, most merciful). Jack-sun with his “Barack talk down to black folk…I like to cut his nuts off” and Sharpton with his “Barack ain’t black autentically” also show true alien vs. predator emo.

BB on October 10, 2008 at 6:47 am

The real queen was Dinah Washington. She passed away in the mid-60s, just around the same time as Sam Cooke and Nat King Cole. This was a couple of years before Aretha reached superstardom, but I can’t imagine that Dinah Washington would have acted in the tacky way that Aretha Franklin has.

c f on October 10, 2008 at 9:15 am

Debbie, you go, girlfriend!

Jeff_W on October 10, 2008 at 9:52 am

at least tina still dance at 60 something and it looks like ms frankin need to talk to star jones because she is so huge i bet she cant wipe herself anymore!!!!!!!

PNAMARBLE on October 10, 2008 at 4:08 pm

And Aretha Franklin is a Preacher’s Kid. Sigh.

Jewel Atkins on October 10, 2008 at 11:29 pm

Debbie you and the others on here really need to get a life!! I really would love to see what each of you asses look like!!!

Mike on June 13, 2010 at 9:34 pm

Oh and Dinah Washington as much as I love her she was not that nice to other female singers ie Patti Labelle who she told to stop singing her damn songs..Do your history before you speak!!!

Mike on June 13, 2010 at 9:36 pm

Aretha has a magnificent voice. That is where it ends for her. She is the queen of ghetto. Whitney, Dionne, ETC. are her people. The only reason for these statements is for press. TIna is magnificent anhas managed to distance herself from this type of stuff. Now granted Tina’s kids are NO angels but she seems to handle it diferently. Aretha is a Ni—r who won’t pay her bills. Much like the above mentioned people and black when it suits her. She should have kept her mouth shut, but based on her size she cant’t do that. Guess if there was fried chicken in a 4 block radius she would have said nothing.

seanm on April 29, 2013 at 6:10 pm

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