March 5, 2009, - 12:23 pm

“Watchmen” Fanatic Derangement Syndrome: Disease of the Pretentious Slacker Ignorami; “Watchmen” Was Anti-Reagan Rant; “Not Marketed to Kids” on “American Idol”

By Debbie Schlussel
I guess I shouldn’t be amazed at the number of slacker ignoramuses who are up in arms about my frank review cutting down the absolute crap they worship a/k/a “Watchmen“, coming out in theaters late tonight. The e-mails they send me and the comments they make about how “deep,” “edgy” and “profound” this vile piece of trash (which is none of these) is, reminds me of the blind statements of followers of Jim Jones. And we all know what happened after they drank he purple Kool-Aid. If only this movie could achieve that result, it would be the most fantastic exercise in natural selection ever conducted in America.
But sadly, there is no instant cure or sudden death for “Watchmen” Fanatic Derangement Syndrome. You can read some of the so infected and diseased in the comments section of my review. But I’ve received a ton of vile, obscene, and just plain stupid and obnoxious e-mails because I dared call this trash wrapped in the guise of a high brow graphic novel what it is: pure garbage.

watchmen.jpg

Oh, and by the way, to all of you slacker Watchmen defenders and fanatics–who resemble the many respondents on “Jay Walking,” yet are suddenly the self-appointed intellectual lights of our world–grisly is grisly, and gratuitous, graphic violence serves no positive or useful purpose in our society, even if you read it first in a comic book. You’re a bunch of dummies with no moral compass, but liking this stupid comic book which pretends violence and the depraved is “edgy” or “sophisticated,” makes you feel smart. When you’re actually quite stupid. But now, with this movie, you’ve got pretentious stupidity. You don’t realize you’re still just as dumb, your IQ just as low and probably lower.
And, yes, you future citizens of “Idiocracy,” it’s a comic book. Quit your pretentious drivel about this being important because it’s a “graphic novel.” Memo to the creators of Richie Rich and Archie: You missed your calling. If only you’d called your product a “graphic novel” and added scenes of Archie raping Betty and Veronica and Jughead sawing off Reggie’s Arms, you’d be in businesss. Dummies.
It’s frankly hilarious to read the arrogance of the ignorami, telling me I don’t have “cultural literacy” because I don’t like a movie based on a comic book promoting rape, torture, and brutal killing. Here’s a tip to you clueless wonders: You can’t have culture literacy when there ain’t culture. Just like I’d be wrong to call this a clash of civilizations, because then we would be wrongly assuming that there is civilization on your end.
While most of the e-mails are vile and stupid–and simultaneously so pretentious and self-important–it’s obvious they’d be best saved for open poetry reading night at the local college coffeehouse. That’s the only place where your fertilizer has willing consumers (and at at the box office on Friday, where I’m sure this crap will be a huge hit for you pretentious geeky slacker losers with no life and absolutely no sense of decency or class).
You keep writing me these deranged e-mails, which include statements about how I “don’t understand the background” and that it was exactly the same in “the graphic novel.” Get a clue: That I didn’t first look at a comic book picture of a rape scene before seeing the same in a movie is a distinction without a difference. That you did, is a distinction with merit, i.e., that you’re an idiot who spends valuable time and money on idiocy and depravity. You are what you eat.
And you are no better than the lumpenproletariat lowlifes at the Coliseum who orgasmically watched and cheered when Christians were forced to fight animals. You are no different, and you are essentially chomping at the bit to go see the modern-day version, tonight. With people like you populating America and dominating pop culture offerings, I have no doubt that soon enough we will return to the days of the barbaric live human versus beast shows. You salivate at the chance to watch barbarism tonight. That’s who you are.
Why not just watch “Texas Chainsaw Massacre”? At least that was honest about what it is and didn’t march under this ridiculous banner of being highbrow when it’s really just crap.
Poor Hitler. If only he’d made Mein Kampf into a comic book instead of an actual written screed. Then, the ovens of Auschwitz and the human lampshades would be all the rage and cool of kitsch. Silly me, for not understanding that close-ups of sawing off someone’s arms and dogs chowing down on a six-year-old girl are so much high culture because they were in a comic book first. Idiocy. And, oh, it’s a disgusting comic book that TIME Magazine liked. Therefore, it must be the end all, be all. Tell it to Ariel Sharon, who knew something about the “truth” and “accuracy” of TIME. Oh, wait, I’m assuming something really big here: that you “Watchmen” ignoramuses actually know who Ariel Sharon is or what his deal was with TIME. And that would be truly clueless.
And to those imbeciles who claim–blindly–that this outrageous movie is not marketed to kids, pray tell who is the target audience of “American Idol” on which several trailers ran this week. Yup, “American Idol”–no way that’s a kids show or that kids who see it won’t want to go see this horrible movie. Only if they market it on Sesame Street are they marketing it to kids, right?
Not that if it weren’t marketed to kids, that would make this crap smell any better.
Still, I’ve gotten many e-mails like these from parents, who attest that they thought this was a superhero movie and that their kids have been bombarded with the marketing for this grotesque movie:

Debbie,
I cannot recall how I got pointed to your review of Watchmen, but thank you for your review! Ever since the trailers came out my son, 15 1/2 wanted to see the movie. No he has not read the novel or comics, but something about this movie made me research it more. Let’s just say I had a bad feeling. I greatly appreciate your detailed review of this movie. We are not going to see this movie and it became a great teaching point.
Michael

Uh-huh, not marketed to kids, right? His son just found out about the movie and wants to go see it . . . by accident?
While I’m not surprised to find out that many of those who’ve written their deranged, undue outrage that I deigned to tell the truth about this trash and insult their low-class cultural sensibilities (or rather non-sensibilities), voted for Barack Obama and are liberals, I am surprised that anyone would claim this is a conservative movie.
It was originally written–per the author’s own declaration–as an attack on Ronald Reagan. Reader Christopher summarizes it in this letter:

Ms Schlussel,
First THANK YOU for the article on Watchmen.
I wanted to add that you are dead right on the slant of this movie. The writer’s original intention as declared by him in a 1987 interview in The Comics Journal was for this have an anti-Reaganism theme. He feared directly attacking President Reagan because he figured it would make people not want to read.
I think this is absolutely a golden opportunity to hammer home the point that mass media influences matter. People are actively ignoring even the stated goal of the author himself for the sake of “a good time’… This is how we get the fouled up pop culture.
You have a better opportunity than I to present this side of the story to people so please consider looking into what I said here and decide if you think it’s worth while to write more about.
Again thank you,
Christopher

Bottom line: If you’re a “Watchmen” fan, there’s something sick about you. You’re sick if you enjoy watching wanton rape, torture, and murder, no matter what the background for it is. I don’t care if it first appeared in a warped comic book paraded with a high-brow euphemism for comic book.
I don’t give a crap if it’s meant to show that “the world is dark” and that “superheroes have problems and are everyday people, too,” which have been among the insipid, vapid excuses I’ve received from empty-headed Watchmen fanatic who mindlessly repeat the phony talking points that make them feel smart.
Guess what? We know there are bad people and that people are everyday people with problems. If you don’t know that, and you think a movie like this is necessary to make the point, you’re even more warped and stupid than I originally diagnosed.
And maybe your sister should be fed to dogs and your mother raped and your brother should have his arms sawed off (as they do in this snuff/torture-porn movie). You know, just to make the point.
But we’ll be sure to depict it in a comic book first, just to make it “high-brow.” And get the money of the mindless “Watchmen” fandom sheeple.

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151 Responses

“Narrow-minded people who made Hitler possible.” Now I understand where many of “The Watchmen” fanatics are coming from and what they say no longer bothers me. When you’re dealing with irrational hatred for a human being, reason is completely lost on that crowd. Its sick, its depraved and it just makes one’s skin crawl. Its bad enough a lot of posters went berserk because she’s a woman. Its going below the belt to imply she didn’t understand what she saw because she’s a Jew! The same kind of twisted thinking that turned Mein Kampf into a real life psycho comic book in which millions of real people were tortured, raped, gassed and murdered – is the same kind of thinking that manifests itself in a lot of “The Watchmen” comments. Its understandable why Debbie loathes it and its why I happen to share her view on it. Being insulted for being “narrow-minded” Jews is a badge of honor!

NormanF on March 12, 2009 at 2:11 am

    Narrow mindedness is a double-edged sword here. Yes I agree it was wrong of posters to bash her for being a woman or a Jew. However the same could be said of her bashing people as stupid, moronic and sick just for being fans and liking the film or comic.

    Frank on May 16, 2010 at 8:07 pm

The bottom line is if a movie is rated R, and parents allow their underage children to see it, it’s the parents’ fault, nobody else’s.
Ms. Schlussel, I agree that many of the comments you have received have been disrespectful and silly. And I think that is a shame because I really think this situation could bring forth some interesting debate, not just on this movie, but on the subject of R rated movies in general.
Honestly, though, I was more offended by your responses to this comments (both in this article and the review post) than any of the content I saw in ‘Watchmen.’ I am 30 years old, college educated, and a good wife and a good mother -I left my children at home when I went to see this film- and I don’t think I deserve to be compared to a Jim Jones follower, repeatedly told that I am various synonyms of ‘stupid’ or that my mother should be raped because I thought this movie was a well-made adaptation of a well-written book.
Ms. Schlussel, you’ve lost a reader, although since I’m simply a ‘dummy with no moral compass,’ I’m sure you won’t miss me. God bless.

tennman on March 12, 2009 at 7:18 am

Here in Australia I have not once seen the movie advertised towards children (in fact I haven’t seen it advertised on tv at all!). In all the interviews I have seen or heard, the actors have said that the movie is not for children. And that’s all on top of the rating that would be shown clearly on any advertisement at that.
What is causing this controversy is the fact that people don’t do their research on movies. It’s not very hard to look in a local newspaper or watch the television for a movie review show. It’s even easier to search on the internet.
In this day and age we have to come to terms with people exploring the “darker” side of things, which enviably WILL get transferred to media and entertainment (Batman got considerable darker, for example). It’s like how video games are getting darker as well with each step and it’s about time parents started to clue up to what their children are seeing. Look at the ratings, take a little time to ask the clerk, even try to look up a review on the internet. You wouldn’t simply let your child walk into a video game store and let them purchase something you don’t agree with, right? The same needs to go for all medias, just as you are concerned with what your child is looking up on the internet.
It’s time to realise that not everything is going to fit a certain “mold”. People will always be coming up with new ways to change a genre in the face of so many Hollywood cliches being churned out. People should change their perspectives to expect this now, even by just a little. You’ll end up suffering a lot less stress and anger if you do.

Raine on March 12, 2009 at 8:03 am

Ms. Schlussel,
I thoroughly enjoyed Watchmen, for technical aspects of the film as well as plot and theme. You can write a bad review of the movie, I don’t really care about that. But when you call fans of the graphic novel and film “deranged”, “slackers”, and “ignoramuses”, you’re sinking to a level that we here on the internet refer to as trolling.
Critiquing any form of art (and yes, I consider this art!) is entirely subjective. You’re entitled to your opinion, but please remember that we are entitled to ours as well. And if you want us to respect your opinions, please respect ours.

Kate on March 12, 2009 at 12:36 pm

[J: AH, YET ANOTHER PERSON WHO KNOWS BETTER THAN ALL OF THOSE STUDIES SHOWING THAT KIDS (AND ADULTS) WHO WATCH VIOLENT MOVIES BECOME MORE VIOLENT AND DESENSITIZED. I'M SURE THE FACT THAT HOLLYWOOD'S ESCALATINGLY VIOLENT MOVIES HAVE ABSOLUTELY ZERO TO DO WITH THE ESCALATINGLY VIOLENT CRIMINALS AND THEIR ACTS. JUST A COINCIDENCE . . . IN THE WORLD ACCORDING TO DERANGED, MINDLESS "WATCHMEN" FANATICS. BRAINIACS. DS]
yea your right that has been proven, for about 5 minutes after you see the violence.
You can keep your retarded views just stop being such a bitch and apologize for personally calling out everyone who likes watchmen and calling them stupid because they dont agree with you.
god I fell sorry for your child/(ren)

alexalex on March 14, 2009 at 7:42 pm

I’m frustrated that you keep posting garbage like this and associating it with things like, “God’s will” and the like. As a Christian myself, I’m ashamed that I am in any way associated with you. It just started as a hamfisted review about a movie that some incompetent parents took their kids to. Then you attacked objective posts with absolute bullshit logic and denouced the artistic merit of graphic novels, of which I am certain you have never even laid eyes on before, let alone read one.
Don’t ever post garbage like this again you narrow-minded simpleton.

Ashamed on March 15, 2009 at 5:42 am

Madame, I know I can’t change your mind, as so many have show, but if you could refrain from insulting them, you wouldn’t have to deal with this sort of thing. Ah, but there it is. You want to do this kind of thing! You want controversy, you want publicity, you want to be KNOWN! A hit is a hit, eh? That hit counter doesn’t care if the person looking at your page hates you or loves you? I just says people look at you site more and more, as you insult more and more people. I, myself, am a white male. I am the majority. I have my prejudices, but if I don’t like black people (but I do like them, just to let you know) I’m not going on my blog and saying ‘down with blacks, down with them!’ I bloody keep my mouth shut. I’ve seen you website. You are the ultimate hate portal.
Have a nice life.

sushix on March 15, 2009 at 6:11 pm

As a Christian and a Conservative, I’m ashamed by you. That you use the “Conservative” umbrella to justify your hate speech, to claim that you know anything of the almighty… Sickens me.
You are the embodiment of everything that is wrong with America today.
I completely agree that children shouldn’t see this movie… And that some scenes are very graphic and very gritty.
However, what you’re missing, is the psychological aspect of the entire thing. The message of the book was that, if a human can justify an action in it’s mind, the human can carry out the act without regret. Like your blog, here.
I, personally, couldn’t justify spreading hate and ignorance about Muslims, but you can, and you do so without regret. I couldn’t justify killing millions of people, but a character in that movie could, and did so without regret.
And, really, let’s look at the Reagen argument you so eagerly jumped on. It’s not necessarily an anti-Reagen theme so much as it is an anti-hero theme… Reagen was seen as a hero, a politician who could come into office and get things done and fix things, a man without fault. The Watchmen were meant to embody the faults of every human.
A more modern version of this situation would be anti-Obama, which I guarantee you’d be all for.
I eagerly await your ALL CAPS response.

M_S on March 18, 2009 at 5:34 am

M_S, if you care to look over some of the comments on this page, or even the original page, you will see that the lady has simply stopped responding, because she is being overwhelmed by the amount of well written comments with good points that clearly show that she is an ignorant person. Don’t hold your breathe.

sushix on March 18, 2009 at 8:22 am

I find your argument amusing, Debbie, as well as being droll and trying. First up, I’m going to say that I consider myself to be educated, perhaps even more so then you. I can play two orchestral instruments to a professional standard, as well as a dozen other ethnic and historic instruments. I am on the forefront of knowledge when it comes down to baroque and classical music, and I have studied the portraiture of the courts of King Charles 1 for 6 years and counting. I re-enact English Civil War battles, and often make my presense known at the theatre and Opera house, Shakespeare and the operettas of Gilbert and Sullivan being my prime love. I have studied English literature, along with 1920s American literature and Breton lays. I love films, especially the Ealing comedies of the 1940s.
And I love comic books. I loved the Watchmen adaptation. The comics it was based on were works of art, and the film itself is a good companion to the graphic novel, as well as art in itself.
Art doesn’t have to be pretty, Debbie. Few art is. Look up some Francis Bacon’s painting. He was gay, and became deeply depressed by the death of his partner. His painting are graphic depictions of skined carcasses and bloody corpses, and he is considered as one of the greatest modern artists. Titus Andronicus, written by Shakespeare, is still one of the most grotesque plays in potential. In it, a character is fed the remains of their children in a pie, and another character’s eyes are ripped off on stage. In the 17th century, a time that you may consider ‘godly’ and ‘pure’, this scene was often realised by throwing animal guts onto the laughing audience. It was at this time too, that public executions were a fun family past-time. Parents would take their children to the beheading of criminals, just to teach them what would happen if they stepped on the wrong side of the law.
Watchmen can be compared to Titus Andronicus, and the common beliefs of the 17th century in this way. Watchmen shows us, in a very graphic detail, what we can become if we abuse our power. If one isn’t afraid of consequence, what would happen? Rape, death, plunder. Much like how the original version of fariy tales shocked children into behaving (have you ever read the original version of ‘Little Red Riding Hood?’ Let’s just say, it’s rather sexual, with the odd bit of cannibalism thrown in), Watchmen would shock anyone onto the straight and narrow. If you had fully understood the film, you would understand that it doesn’t glorify violence but rather shows us the result of using it.
Lastly, I would like to bring your attention to the theories of Freud. He believed that there were three sides to our mind. The Ego, which is the ‘cultured’ of our parts which is seen every day, the Id, which is the unknown part of ourselves, governed by natural desires, and the Superego, which keeps our Id in check. Freud believed that if the Id is blanked out for too long, it will emerge in some way or another, maybe in our dreams, or even through a sudden burst of destructive anger. The beast within us has to be satisfied, otherwise it will eventually take us over. We will return to mindless beasts.
We have to listen to the Id once in a while, and appease it every so often. Otherwise… we can never be too sure how it will show itself. The violence in Watchmen quenches our instinctive, animalistic desire for violence, much like Titus Andronicus and the works of Francis Bacon. That’s just something to think about. If a person is shown no violence throughout their lives, is raised on nothing but Barbie and Teletubbies, then how long will it take them to crack?
Sorry, this is probably going completely over your head, and I don’t blame you. Psychoanalytics is a tough, unforgiving subject. There again, as a ‘Watchmen buffoon’, as you so wonderfully call me, I probably haven’t got a clue. I’m probably a stupid, washed up ignoramous, doomed to spend their life killing and raping, like every other person exposed to fictional violence.
I’m not stupid enough to know that showing a child something like ‘The Watchmen’ is damaging though. We wouldn’t want to be like those uneducated, primitive Stuarts, those ‘baddies’ who took their children to regular executions, now, would we?

Bex on March 21, 2009 at 8:00 pm

    Holy crap, that one shrill redhead lady (her name is Anne something; she hates everything?) has a slightly-less-outwardly-hideous twin!

    Lol, this whole thing is so funny, though. I can literally hear your ovaries shriveling due to lack of use and just being boiled away in a stew of irrational hatred for everyone and everything. Ah, Ms. Shluffel, never change; your rantings are the best comedy I’ve read in weeks!

    Emma on September 10, 2009 at 10:58 am

Oh, and Debbie. I find it incredibly mirthful that you gave The Dark Knight a positive review, and Watchmen such a bad one, especially since The Dark Knight WAS marketed to children, yet was still incredibly violent, admittedly not as much as Watchmen, but then again, Watchmen is an R, and not marketed to children. So I assume you don’t really mind the fact that multiple people are knived and shot, garrotted and hanged, crippled and beaten in one film that children are more likely to watch, then an adult film based on the same premise, with the more gory violence, that children are less likely to have heard of.
And that 15 and a half year old? Did you not realise he is just 2 years below the restriction allowed to see this film? Did it not enter your mind that he most likely heard about it from an older boy at school, before researching it on the web? Come on, boys that age will be on the internet anyway looking at much worse things then R rated trailers, accept that no film-maker can hide a film from a tech-savvy teenager with access to the internet. This isn’t the 70s, grandma.
Methinks that this has more to do with your stance on politics rather then your fear ‘for the children’ or your hate of violence. The Dark Knight is based on the cleaning up of society by the combined efforts of the police and government, whereas the Watchmen is based on a corrupt society and the corrupt citizens who serve it. Oh dear, do you interpretate this as an ‘attack’ on your beloved government and country? Just look at things from another point of view for once. The Dark Knight is based on graphic novels that are just, if not more violent then Watchmen, so that immediately renders most of your arguments invalid. You can’t spring those ‘too much violence for the kiddies’, ‘because this is based on a comic you can’t enjoy it’ and ‘violence doesn’t belong in comics’ threads anymore. You’re entirely for one violent comic book film that was genuinely advertised to children, and entirely against another violent comic book film, that is in no way aimed at children.
Lastly, this is aimed at the people who rely entirely on what Debbie says – she is incredibly biased against this film. Although it contains some violence, and some sex, it is all within reason, and serves to tell a point. No penetration is shown during the sex scene, and neither is any close up shots of genitalia – it’s all filmed very artisitcally, and Dr. Manhattan’s penis isn’t drawn attention to – it is an incredibly tasteful inclusion of nuidity, that most people would just accept, or not even note. The violence is pretty strong, but no where near as bad as Debbie insists. You don’t see the Comedian hit the pavement, there is no close, zoomed in shots of extreme gore, besides the occasion shot of blood stains upon people, ceilings and objects, which is a theme of the film. The head cleaving is backlit, no detail is really seen, no nudity is seen during the attempted rape (I repeat, ATTEMPTED), and the dogs do not rip a little girl apart, they are merely shown fighting over a bone with a girl’s shoe on the end. It’s no where near as bad as Debbie says, so either read her review tongue in cheek, see the film and then make up your own opinion, or, better yet, just see the film without consulting her biased claptrap. Yes, there is violence and sex. The sex isn’t very graphic at all, and very beautifully filmed, and there is violence, strong violence, but only in a few scenes. The film rarely dwells on violence, other then to explain the reason why the characters are as they are.
Stop being spoonfed false information by a silly prude, and make your own choice if you want to see the film. If you decide not to see it, then that’s fine. If you do, then you’re going to experience something you’ve never experienced before – something that will no doubt make you feel mad at some points, yet jubilant and overwhelmed at others. Maybe you will see films in a new way, maybe you’ll be inspired to read the comics, or maybe you’ll start your own blog attacking the film for using cinematic devices that you don’t understand. Then you can either become a fan, or hater, and either way, your lives will continue.
[B: IF YOU WATCHMANIACS ACTUALLY READ MY SITE YOU'D NOTE I HAVE SEVERAL ENTRIES DECRYING THAT ABOUT "THE DARK KNIGHT"--OH, AND ALSO IF YOU BOTHERED TO READ MY REVIEW, WHICH YOU DIDN'T. ONE MORE STUPID, UNEDUCATED COMMENT LYING ABOUT MY WRITING, AND YOU'LL BE BANNED. GETTING TIRED OF YOU. YOU NEED TO GET A LIFE. DS]

Bex on March 22, 2009 at 6:23 pm

Bex, come over here and give me a hug. We’re friends.
[B: IF YOU WATCHMANIACS ACTUALLY READ MY SITE YOU'D NOTE I HAVE SEVERAL ENTRIES DECRYING THAT ABOUT "THE DARK KNIGHT"--OH, AND ALSO IF YOU BOTHERED TO READ MY REVIEW, WHICH YOU DIDN'T. ONE MORE STUPID, UNEDUCATED COMMENT LYING ABOUT MY WRITING, AND YOU'LL BE BANNED. GETTING TIRED OF YOU. YOU NEED TO GET A LIFE. DS]
Great! Did you know that to comment on your site, you have to sign up for another site, so you can’t REALLY ban us, the other site does, because you whine that the meanies are making fun of your site?

sushix on March 23, 2009 at 4:47 pm

Hiya sushix, I appreciate friendliness from all corners ;)
Debbie, I don’t want you to get mad at me – I don’t want this to turn into a flame war. Yes, I know you disliked the violence in TDK, but you still gave it 3 ‘Regans’, if I remember correctly. If I got that wrong, you could correct me. I just don’t see how you could give a one violent film a good mark, and another violent film a bad mark, especially since the first film was obviously marketed towards children as well as adults, and you still haven’t provided us with decisive proof that the Watchmen was ever marketed towards children in the first place (besides a link to the official site, which was written for the adult fans of the film/comic, and the fact that a Watchmen trailer was aired during American Idol – which is invalid in itself, in that American Idol is not aimed towards children, though admittedly, children would watch it.)
I reread my original posts, and found nothing that was ‘stupid’ or ‘uneducated’, or anything that was ‘lying about your writing’. If something offended you, then quote it to me.
I post on your site in order to provide you with viewpoints other then your own, which would normally be welcomed by other bloggers, for the sake of starting an interesting conversation, and perhap the chance of learning a little something from one another. You can’t have a debate without having two sides to an argument, and banning me will just show to everyone who reads the comments that you cannot reply to my points. By banning me and deleting my posts, without sensibly posting a counter-argument, it just proves that you can’t answer back.
Lastly, I believe I do have a life. I’m 18, and work on films. I have worked on two films so far, not much, but it’s fun and exciting. If you read my first post, you would know what I enjoy. I feel as though I have a satisfying lifestyle, and I can honestly say that if I die tomorrow, I’ll be dying a happy girl.

Bex on March 23, 2009 at 6:54 pm

I am 20 years old. Registered Republican. Reagan was my favorite president. I am a history major. I am an EMT/Fireman with the DCFD and other Fire Departments on the DEL-MAR-VA region. I am also a volunteer EMT/Fireman and do a lot of other volunteer work. Was a JROTC student for my 4 years of High School. I make roughly $50,000-$60,000 per year. I LOVE this book and this movie. I think that your viewpoints are as fascist as Obamas’ are socialist. You cannot have a free country without opposing viewpoints. The market for the action figures and other memorabilia are made for the collector, not for the child who will most likely destroy it or grow bored of it in 10 days. Also, parents are very poor parents if they need to rely on other people to tell them what to take their kids to see and to buy for them. So, if you want to talk Jim Jones.

WalterKovacs on March 27, 2009 at 4:24 am

You are a great person W.Kovacs (and loving the name, incidentally)
Have a closer look at the action figures you posted Debbie (http://www.watchmencomicmovie.com/watchmen-action-figures-toys.php), go onto the ‘preorder’ link, as if you were buying them, and have a lookie loo at how much they cost. $200 for the set? Yup, and they are the cheapest. The Deluxe figures cost more then $100 each. Just the sort of thing you would buy a child.
Not only that, the site they are sold on is a very well made Watchmen site intended for adults. It delves into the psychology of the comic and provides documentaries about the making of the film – it’s intended for the fans of the franchise, and by fans, I mean people who would sensibly be able to read and watch Watchmen, IE – not children. ‘Action figures have also been made of many child-friendly figures, such as Hannibal Lecter. That must mean… GASP! Silence of the Lambs was marketed to children! http://www.amazon.com/Cult-Classics-Hannibal-Lecter-Action/dp/B000K4X8OQ
This is the same site that sells the lunchbox. It seems that you don’t understand that tin collectable lunchboxes are very popular amongst fans – heck, I’m 18, and put an order down for a Rorschach lunch box. Again, look at how much they cost – http://www.entertainmentearth.com/prodinfo.asp?number=NC11008 that is $17 for a lunchbox. Not exactly something you would buy for a child. And just to further prove that lunchboxes are marketed to adults too, here is a Fallout 3 lunchbox, more then $20 http://xbox.joystiq.com/2008/06/04/fallout-3-collectors-edition-lunch-box-and-contents/
And… finally, have a little look on youtube at the sort of people who buy collectable film action figures. Not one of them under 18. http://pop.youtube.com/watch?v=DSfz2yfOuo0 and you can see more on the links. Checkmate.

Bex on March 27, 2009 at 7:30 am

HAHA. Sorry, but this made the laugh the hardest I have in a while. Mostly because I’m 15 and enjoyed both the graphic novel and the movie. Also, it’s so hilarious to see adults (as I’m assuming you are an adult) criticize children (that’s me) that we cannot clearly see the line between reality and fiction and then turn around and spew this bullshit. You obviously have a problem seeing the line between cartoon/cinema violence and actual violence. Finally, I’m pretty sure the intelligence of a comic or movie is not measured on violence or rape. That’s just not how things work in the real-world, honey.
Plenty of books, comic or not, have violence. Exhibit A: Bible. I’ve read a children’s Bible (yes a CHILDREN’S Bible) where entire buildings were destroyed in order to kill the people inside. These buildings were destroyed by people following GOD. They were rewarded for this.
BY THE WAY Watchmen is no more than a fairytale, a little spindle of creativity within an author’s mind. It brings people happiness. Why do you feel the need to destroy others’ happiness? Do you hate happiness? I don’t think you do.
P.S. I don’t appreciate you wishing death, rape, and torture upon my loved ones. It’s really quite a depressing topic, and I would know, I have depression. Just so you know, I DON’T wish anything like that upon you. Just saying…
(I would just to apologize for how scattered and illegible this comment was, I am still working on my paragraph-building and organizational skills.)

Emma on March 27, 2009 at 7:05 pm

I haven’t seen it and I’m not a fan of wanton gore and sex for the sake of wanton gore and sex, but your reaction to the film still comes off as unreasonably extreme, especially comparing it to real-world situations. Neither Christians nor Jews were harmed in the making of this film as far as anybody can tell, so no, the people who flock to see it aren’t at all the same. I doubt it would make them even the slightest more likely to condone real-world brutality. Most people, even the smelliest comic book geeks, can very easily distinguish reality from fantasy.
Your grand sweeping remarks that anybody who would enjoy this film is a depraved and sick monster are just the kind of remarks I expect from someone whose world view is a hair away from the Ku Klux.
There are virtually infinite contexts in which a work of fiction can be enjoyed by an infinite variety of people, either depraved or intellectual. No matter how much something offends and disgusts you, there is no such thing as “objectively” depraved and it’s absurd to claim that everyone enjoying the same work of entertainment has some sort of common deficiency.

scythemantis on March 28, 2009 at 5:34 am

I apologize for saying this, but this is almost as bad as hearing some of the people in the fandom complain. I don’t appreciate someone who has never met me goes on insulting my intelligence and my moral sanity because of what I enjoy, but it is fictitious.I did not enjoy the scenes of rape, murder, etc, but i knew they were part of the plot and part of the psychological development of the plot, as questionable as it maybe. Really that is almost as bad as assuming everyone who watches pornography is a morally deranged pervert. I attend college, have made the Dean’s list in my first semester, I hold a steady job, and I have a prefect bill of mental health, something you seem to think no one who reads and watches this so called ‘crap’ could every possible have.
I also agree with Emma, wishing such things on a person’s loved ones (especially if it has happened as it has in my family) is a rather underhanded and may I say bitches thing to put in to writing.

hatteraxel on March 28, 2009 at 7:35 am

Debbie, you do realise that you can stop this whole shitstorm by just apologising? Surely someone of even your intellect would have learnt just from reading comments back from Watchmen fans that readers of the GN and watchers of the film cover a very wide sect of society, from lawyers, tutors, lecturers, members of the gentry, and descendents of signers of the U.S. constitution, through to pop culture nerds, polititions and intellectuals. You would know this, of course, if you have even bothered reading some the responses you have gotten (your lack of responce suggests you haven’t).
Just apologise. You have single-handedly insulted, and wished death and disease, upon some of the most well read and interesting people in the world. And, you haven’t even been able to back up a single one of your points, prefering to just metaphorically sit in a corner with your hands over your ears, going ‘LA LA LA I’M NOT LISTENING LA LA’.
You are a sad excuse for a ‘movie reviewer’, and not worthy to call yourself capable of giving fair, unbiased, sensible reviews of films, which is pretty much what the job entails. You are not a movie lover – save us all the annoyance, and either start doing it properly, or stop altogether. It’s incredibly rude to film-makers like Snyder for you to see his film, not understand it, and make a ‘review’ of it anyway. Just the fact that you didn’t even know about Watchmen beforehand is proof enough you don’t take your job professionally. It is to the alternative book market what Hamlet is to drama. It has won awards, and inspired and contributed to countless films and T.V. shows, and as a ‘reviewer’ you should have known about it. you should have given it recgonition, even if you yourself didn’t like it, and you should stop calling fans of the GN and film morons, because you have unwittedly insulted one of the biggest fan bases out there.
Make an effort to understand why you are so ignorant of the facts, learn about why the GN is regarded as one of the single most important works in pop culture, and take time to breath. Hey, read some proper reviews of the film as well, the positve and the negative ones, and then you’ll learn how to get across your opinions and facts in a way that is taken seriously and that doesn’t resemble a child shouting names.
You might also learn that it is not the people who like Watchmen who are dangers to society, but rather the people who haven’t, and/or disregard it because of it’s genre. It will be out of these people the dangerous ones will emerge. They will be the discriminaters, they’ll be the ones who think they are above it all, and all powerful. They will be the ones who refuse to look in the mirror that is held up to the world. And you, Debbie, fall into the group. Dammit, you have already proved my point by discriminating against every fan, or even every casual reader. Plus, you have completely refused to see the point Watchmen is so graphically trying to put across.
Just apologise Debbie. I just hope you understand what a mistake you have made. At least I can be sure that until you do say sorry, you will be getting a larger and larger stream of people arguing against your points. It’s going to become harder and harder, and you’re making yourself more and more unpopular.
Until you apologise, you’ll be hearing from me again. If you ban me, I’ll just laugh at your weakness, and re-register under a difference name.
Have a happy life.

Bex on March 29, 2009 at 6:45 pm

I’ve been thinking about this for a while now because I find you fairly disturbing and I have come to this conclusion: I would rather have a 11 year old watch watchmen than read this post. At least watchmen isn’t real and if the 11 year old is very sophiscated they might understand what they are implying about our world and our responsiblity to it, but you are just a terrible charicture of the worst of human nature and your real, i think, but i wish to someday discover that Debbie is actually a hoax. I frankly think you’re deranged at this point because anyone who wishes other people to die because they disagree with them is heading straight for big brother. I mean you are advocating mass murders of everyone who likes watchmen, now I’m going to assume this was meant sarcastically, but it’s still callous and cruel, and now how is you advocating murdering people for their political beliefs as a stylistic point any different than watchmen showing rape and violence as a stylistic point to show how callous we as a nation have become? You’re a crazed hypocrite. Oh and by the way I didn’t even like Watchmen that much, I did like the graphic novel but we’re not talking about the GN and really I’m kind of done defending that movie, but you should seek some serious help for your anger and hate issues. I’m not kidding.

hanedw on April 5, 2009 at 9:05 pm

Hello!
Still refusing to answer?
Still haven’t got any intelligent counter-arguments or proof of what you’re preaching?
Like I said before – tis very rude. And pretty ironic too, that you call fans of Watchmen ‘ignorami’, when you can’t even back up your own points. Especially when you still continue to scream out that violence in this film is entirely included just to give snuff fans a hard on. Maybe that’s what you were expecting (and hoping) to find when you went in, and if you weren’t so walled up in your own little mind, you would have noticed that the exact opposite were true.
I’m interested to find out what you thought of Fight Club, Se7en, Silence of the Lambs, A Clockwork Orange and Godfather. Since you seem to think that it’s perfectly expected to take children to a certificate 18 films, only to be shocked when it contains gratuitous violence.
By the way, how you can give Watchmen a bad review based on it’s level of violence, and 300 a good review, completely confuses me. Watchmen has a much higher rating then 300 on terms of censorship, yet it also has a much more diluted content of violence.
It just hardens my view that your ‘reviews’ are just another medium that you rate on political stance alone. A real movie reviewer would put their personal beliefs aside, and rate a film based purely on it’s artistic merit.
You are blinded by your beliefs. You are very ignorant to the world, and to a medium that you seem to think you’re a master of. Yeah, right. You’ve already proven you can’t handle the notion of a parallel reality.

Bex on May 24, 2009 at 2:27 pm

If being a fan of ‘Watchmen’ makes people sick, then the world is full of sick people.

Who enjoy the hell out of being sick. Normal is overrated, Sick is in.

Mike G on July 28, 2009 at 3:50 pm

As someone who has teachers in he film industry and has an Intelligent Quotient that is above average with honors in my classes and having taken many classes from the High English and Government classes to all sorts of art classes, you are greatly exaggerating false statements and know nothing.
It’s simple: you know nothing.
Yes, it was anti-Reagan, but it also included a message. Nothing is perfect. The human race is pretty messed up and it was to be taken that the ideologies of “perfect peace” is never true and that bullshit and bad shit happens beneath the perfect face of society wall papers and propaganda.
And why do you care if it’s anti-Reagan? Do you think he was the perfect president who did nothing bad? Then you’re wrong and clearly are not looking past the picture as the original writer wanted people to do.
You have done no research. It was never marketed towards kids and was never meant to do so. Porn is not marketed towards kids, but it’s easy for kids to find it just by typing “blah blah pictures”.
Then there’s word of mouth when parents and older teens talk about it around the younger age group and now even the youngsters want to watch it.
In my school we do real criticism and we did not entirely like the movie for the editing cuts and elimination of certain scenes and lengthening of others.
You, however, are not criticizing. You are bashing it like the “moral” Christians who beat and kill a kid for being gay. Is killing moral for whatever reason? Maybe or maybe not. The author wants people to question and define this for themselves.
And as someone who is in this industry with a higher than normal IQ and above average memorization capabilities, then I stand by that you’re completely wrong, because clearly you don’t know what even the word civilization means to the government (yes, I did take an AP government course as well).

And my film teacher and other film students I have known never mentioned ever once about this being targeted towards kids…ever. It’s rated R, it’s always been targeted towards adults, just not the immature ones like you.

SHE on December 19, 2009 at 8:04 pm

Ugh, just… ugh.

The first thing I’d like to say is: THANK YOU for calling anyone that likes a book a slacker, an ignoramus, “sick”, (paraphrasing) “leading us into idiocracy”, “stupid”, of questionable morals, of low IQ, and depraved.

Using ad hominem attacks against people that you don’t know really does show that you’re mature, open to your critics, and know when to admit that you’re wrong.

As for the rest of your post(s)

‘R’ rated movies are not for children. No matter how many kids see them, they’re still meant for adults. The marketing was NEVER aimed at children or young people. Of course, common sense says that they could have seen ads on any major TV network (FOX, CBS, and the like), or been told through word-of-mouth by children of less responsible parents, that still doesn’t make them the target audience.

Graphic novels are bound in a cover like a book (rather than stapled together) and number in the hundreds of pages. Obviously, some graphic novels and comics are aimed at children and teens, just like movies and television shows BUT a visual medium can convey adult themes, please stop propagating narrow minded, outdated, views about other mediums.

As to that comment in your other blog posting about historic inaccuracies: It’s called alternate history, something that can be used as the setting, or set up to a fictional tale. American author Harry Turtledove’s work is a good example of fiction using alternate history as a setting.

Of course, I doubt you’ll actually read this, so I’m probably venting in vain. But the fact that the majority of comments on this blog is of the disparaging variety will make you get the message I’m trying to convey.

I truly wish you see your error, and see past your narrow-minded point of view.

-Just another ignoramus

Matty on December 31, 2009 at 12:50 am

Debbie, the people responding are not watchman fanatics. They are people from various imageboards, such as 4chan, that have gathered to rant at what is perceived as a horribly faulty critique of a film. For example, you seem to confuse a historical inaccuracy for an alternate history.

The film is a deconstruction of the superhero genre. It is based on a graphic novel that was a deconstruction of the superhero genre; it has been advertised as a deconstruction of the superhero genre; the average 14 year old can see that it is a deconstruction of the superhero genre; the story won awards because it was a deconstruction of the superhero genre.

Kyazu on December 31, 2009 at 12:59 am

You are a sad, stupid cunt. I hope you die in an overturned car fire.

Rocky on December 31, 2009 at 7:34 pm

I couldn’t bother to read Schussels text, it is one foaming emabarassing ad hominem rambling.

I did read the comments. I am amazed how so many people have bothered to write polite and intelligent answers to Schussel’s hard core trolling.

I’d say, don’t feed it, but on the other hand — I am specially happy about the comments by those who introduced themselves as conservatives and voiced their disgust with the likes of Schussel.

There is hope.

DCR on January 9, 2010 at 1:53 pm

Duuuuuuude.

You are too much. I couldn’t even read this whole article.

Honestly, too much. I’d love to talk to someone like you in person some time. I almost feel like I’m watching someone from the WBC talk. Like my brain just halts because of all the ignorance is stopping it up.

This makes me want to go read Watchmen again, though. :) Yeehaw.

Claire on February 19, 2010 at 1:27 am

Cut it out, fag

Ds is a bitch on February 28, 2010 at 6:10 am

Well like any R rate movies they are bound to have some things in it some people just should not watch,.

reaper on March 19, 2010 at 11:52 am

I’ve seen Watchmen with friends (I have never read the comic), and thought the movie was alright (certainly not suitable for children, though it never pretends to be, nor does it market itself to children), though I hardly consider myself a fan per se, let alone a “fanatic” – thus I hope that you do not categorise this comment as an example of this so-called “fanatic derangement syndrome”.
Unfortunately, this article is little more than shoddy alarmist drivel – but I guess I should’ve expected that from other articles of yours I have recently read which clearly demonstrate your underlying racism and bigotry.
You seem to consider yourself an American patriot, yet unfortunately your extreme views are what America, and other western democracies, are rightfully trying to purge from modern society – the sooner the better.
I appreciate that you take the time to share your views, but forgive me if I choose to read articles that are factual, fair and unbiased, thank you.

Elijah on April 22, 2010 at 6:32 am

Wow. I take it you hate any movie which tackles themes including violence and morality then? Wow… I really feel that much dumber for having read this :/

Elijah on April 22, 2010 at 7:03 am

An article filled to the brim with unfounded personal attacks, rather than actual defense of your previous comments… Yeah, that’ll show ‘em.

jTek on April 22, 2010 at 9:06 am

“Poor Hitler. If only he’d made Mein Kampf into a comic book instead of an actual written screed. Then, the ovens of Auschwitz and the human lampshades would be all the rage and cool of kitsch.”

GODWIN’S LAW

You have lost the argument instantly.

Michael on May 1, 2010 at 4:38 pm

Suggesting that people should die.. that did liked this movie? And call this movie bad .

WOW on May 31, 2010 at 11:32 am

Let me spell out for you why you received such a backlash of bile and hatred from the fans of this movie and the comic it was based on: because you completely trashed the movie in an appallingly biased and shallow fashion on the basis of complete misrepresentations and false claims. While this honestly doesn’t excuse the torrents of open abuse, you have to realise that this is the internet- and your stance (which really and truly was a terrible one) impressed upon these people that you seriously did not DESERVE their respect.

So don’t be surprised at the response you got, because it was the response you asked for. You really should have known better. But then again, I doubt it. Because, once again, you don’t impress yourself upon me as someone who is very bright. That’s the only conclusion I can draw from reading your work.

Arcane Azmadi on June 9, 2010 at 7:51 am

I am maybe unique in that I am a huge fan of the Watchmen COMIC BOOK (the author, Moore, hated the term ‘graphic novel’) but despised the movie.

The whole point of the comic book was to highlight the depravity of the human condition and depict superhero fantasies as delusional in a world that needs humility and compassion, not victory through force.

The movie, I fear, takes the opposite approach. From what I (very disappointingly) saw, the director missed the point of the books entirely, and depicted the violence and sex as a form of entertainment, as evidenced by the increased level of graphic violence.

The Silk Specter was meant to be an examination of the negative psychological effects of the objectification of superhero women, while in the movie she is just a sexually objectified superhero woman.

I share your hatred for the movie, but I strongly encourage you to avoid lumping the original Watchmen comic (one of Time magazine’s 100 greatest novels) and its fans in with the trash in the film adaptation. Especially avoid ad hominem attacks against their intelligence when you can’t be bothered to proof-read your own articles.

Michael Kailus on July 28, 2010 at 6:04 pm

I don’t really have an opinion on The Watchmen. However I have to say I couldn’t stomach this article. Not because of the opinion of the author but because of her writing. I didn’t even read the whole thing because it just seemed to be repeating itself over and over again, using the exact same words over and over and over.

Zehrandomchick on August 4, 2010 at 5:59 pm

This ignorant cunt needs to get her bitch ass back in the kitchen.

Ms. Juicebox on August 28, 2010 at 4:11 am

Just stop writing epic fails, and make me a sandwich, bitch!

TheComedian on October 13, 2010 at 12:19 am

lol I was linked here from tvtropes. You are literally too stupid to insult, Schlussel.

DIV on November 1, 2010 at 1:06 am

What you seem to chose to ignore about this film is that not every character in every movie is supposed to be emulated and looked up to…
When the dogs eat the girl, they are trying to sicken and appal us, not entertain and excite us. Even when Rorschach kills the kidnapper, we are not supposed to be excited. It’s a man breaking down and killing another man! It’s not meant to be an example of good behaviour, it is meant to make us uneasy.
Not everyone goes to the movies to walk out with a silly grin on his face…

Still, I am not saying that it is a good movie. It was mediocre. And if you do not like the way the film was promoted, blame capitalism…

Cray on November 24, 2010 at 4:40 pm

“If only this movie could achieve that result, it would be the most fantastic exercise in natural selection ever conducted in America…”

Yikes…that’s disgusting.

Tyler on December 23, 2010 at 7:57 am

Never before have I seen a point go so far over someone’s head. I seriously hope you aren’t looking into literary analysis as a career. It would be the most pathetic thing ever witnessed.

My kid wants to see scary violent movies all the time, that’s just how kids are. It’s your job to check it out for them and teach them what’s right.

Booster on January 13, 2011 at 2:49 pm

Debbie, are you sure you’re ready for semicolons?

Linnea on February 2, 2011 at 2:20 am

“Bottom line: If you’re a Shakespeare fan, there’s something sick about you.” – Debbie Schlussel

You know, because sex and violence apparently cancels out the mere possibility of artistic merit in this bint’s world.

Also, I worry about Jews that are afraid to type YHVH and instead write “G-d” as if it is a bad word to be censored. How conservative are you? Should disobedient children be stoned to death as commanded by YHVH and Moses?

Kragnorak on July 7, 2011 at 3:21 am

This is great. I’m not entirely convinced this Debbie person is real – it’s a good example of Poe’s Law. She could just be an over-the-top parody of the stereotypical poorly-educated, not very bright, American Christian Conservative who’s always got the wrong end of the stick and ends up outraged over all the wrong things to the amusement of all around – but if so it’s a wonderful parody.

I’m off to find more articles by her. I hope they’re as good!

Michael W on August 1, 2011 at 7:17 am

To use the most eloquent and polite language possible,
“You ma’am, are a royal fucktard.”

Or in the immortal words of Sensei….
“Bitch, please.”

Benji "Bonezy" on August 16, 2011 at 6:54 pm

Good job morons – each and every post by you whiny Watchmen fans proves Debbie’s point.

You don’t like being called names? You don’t like generalizations? Yet I see each and every one of you doing the exact thing you accuse her of doing. Rather hypocritical – and please spare me your pretentious “I am a super educated genius who thinks Watchmen is brilliant commentary on superheroes” crap because you aren’t fooling anyone – certainly not me. I have never seen so many poorly written screeds in my life. If you people end up running this country some day, this country won’t have a future.

Amalia on August 20, 2011 at 11:42 pm

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