November 15, 2013, - 3:17 pm

Wknd Box Office: “Brokeback Mountain 2.0″ a/k/a Dallas Buyers Club, Best Man Holiday

By Debbie Schlussel

**** CORRECTION: As many readers, including a very astute friend, noted, I got the name of the singer of “Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire” wrong. It was, in fact, as you’ve pointed out, Nat King Cole, NOT Bing Crosby as I had noted (the soundtrack for the movie doesn’t include the song, so I couldn’t fact check it that way). It’s been corrected, and I apologize for the error. ****

Yet another weekend with nothing to recommend among the new offerings at movie theaters.

dallasbuyersclubbestmanholiday

* “Dallas Buyers Club“: Matthew McConaughey is a great actor. And I’m told by some Hollywood conservatives that he is even a Republican with conservative leanings. But I doubt it. Nobody with even a modicum of traditional American views would appear in this leftist wet dream of a movie. At once, it’s an attack on big business, “Big Pharma,” Texas cowboys, and middle America. On top of that, this highly overrated, excessively hyped propaganda movie is long, slow, and boring. And it’s the natural progression of a previous cinematic hit of its kind, which is why I dub this movie, “Brokeback Mountain 2.0″

“Based on a true story,” McConaughey is Ron Woodroof, a Texas cowboy, complete with boots, a Stetson hat, and a deep Southern accent. It is 1985, and he is an electrician, working mostly near oil wells and rigs, and he’s also a rodeo bull rider. You can’t get more Texas-y than that. Oh, and he also hates Blacks (he and his friends call them by the N-word), Muslims (he and his friends call them the Sand-N-word), and gays (he calls ‘em “queers” and is disgusted by Rock Hudson, who had at the time come down with AIDS). In short, he’s the perfect caricature of how leftists see the Republican voter and every last soul in flyover country between Los Angeles and New York.










But Woodroof, who is an extremely nasty, sordid, ugly, and unlikable character (at least, in this movie), is forced to become newly accepting of all the gays, including transvestites, and fight the pharmaceutical industry, after he learns he has AIDS. And this, predictably, makes him a better, nicer person.

He has AIDS because he’s had a ton of unprotected sex with various slutty women, including inside the bullpen at the rodeo. And he’s been told to get his affairs in order, as the doctor tells him he has 30 days to live. After paying off hospital workers to get on the then-experimental AZT drug, his health quickly degenerates, and he nearly dies. He learns from an expat American doctor, who lost his license and now works in Mexico, that AZT will kill him and that he needs to go on an alternative blend of vitamins, minerals, and other homeopathic concoctions.

Soon, Woodroof has set up his own club for those with AIDS–the “Dallas Buyers Club.” For an annual membership of several hundred dollars, the buyer can obtain the alternative medicine treatment. His partner is a transvestite (Jared Leto), who looks more feminine and far less transvestitish than that female impersonator, Savannah Guthrie, who hosts NBC’s “Today Show.” But the doctors and Big Pharma want to shut him down. And McConaughey spends the rest of the movie fighting them in court and seeking new avenues to obtain the “meds” (including from Japan). Jennifer Garner plays a mopey, very concerned doctor who befriends Woodroof, and adds nothing to the mix, other than a chick co-star role.

I’m all for the free market and the freedom to kill yourself with alternative medicine, so I mildly liked the fact that the character in this movie fights big government and Big Brother. But that’s really not the main point of this movie. It’s that the capitalist, big pharmaceutical companies (whose AIDS cocktails today have made the virus virtually non-fatal) and doctors are the ones killing da gays. That– along with, “see, you intolerant right wingers are gonna be forced to make nice with the trannies!”–are this movie’s main messages. And I’m just not interested in fiction that ridiculous.

Yup, it’s not very interesting. Not very exciting. Not very happy. Just a depressing annoyance unfortunately occupying far too many movie screens in America. And not something you should spend a penny or a second on.

The rule continues to ring true: if the mainstream media movie critics love it, chances are, you’ll hate it. That’s the case here. Or, at least, it was with me.

FOUR MARXES PLUS THREE OBAMAS PLUS TWO BIN LADENS
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Watch the trailer . . .

* “The Best Man Holiday“: Shoulda been called, “Yet Another Dopey Black Minstrel Show Served Up By Spike Lee’s Cousin.” If I were Black, I’d be offended at the choices that Hollywood–and Black Hollywood–give me. There are basically only two kinds of movies aimed at Black audiences: dopey comedies that remind me of “The Love Boat” or “Three’s Company” on steroids, or slavery/racism movies. Is that all there is? Sadly, yes. And this one goes in the latter category. It’s a stupid, predictable, unnecessarily melodramatic, racist minstrel show. And it’s brought to you courtesy of Malcolm D. Lee, Jew-hatin’, racist Spike’s cousin. It’s also chock full of Black women fighting each other and talking trash. Oh,and Black men fighting each other and talking trash.

The movie is a sequel to 1999’s “The Best Man,” which I (thankfully) did not see. Not sure why a sequel needed to be made, especially if the first one was as bad as this one is. Apparently, in the first one, a football player (Morris Chestnut) is marrying a woman, but his best man (Taye Diggs) sleeps with her just before the wedding, and now they hate each other. They and the other cast of characters from the first movie re-unite 15 years later (yes, I know the movie is only 14 years after the first, but don’t ask me to explain Hollywood math–they supported Obama, remember?).

It’s Christmastime, and Morris Chestnut is now an NFL football player, living in a giant mansion. He and his wife invite all of their college friends to the house for the holidays, where fights and stupid attempts at comedy ensue. Almost every man in this movie (except the token White guy) cries. In fact, the men cry more than the women. I was more than a little annoyed that “Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire” is the background song while the characters in the movie are all having sex. I think Nat King Cole just turned over in his grave, especially since it’s his rendition that’s played. Did his estate and descendants really need the royalties that badly? Apparently.

The movie has such scintillating dialogue as the arguments over which of the women is best at “rocking the mic,” a disgusting sexual reference. I’ll never look at a microphone the same way again. Thanks, Spike Lee’s cousin.

Here are some of the other “fabulous” lines in the movie:

* “I know my way around a vagina.”

* To the White boyfriend (Eddie Cibrian) of one of the women, “Do you have a Django Candyland fantasy, or this is the first time you’ve gone to the exotic jungle?”

* One of the other women referring to the White boyfriend, “If I had my way, that’s what I’d get: a tall vanilla swag of latte.”

* “Hell, I don’t know why White people pay me to tell them what Black people like. I’m light skinned.”

* “You hardly hear of Brothers with low sperm count issues, especially with baby mamas and baby mama drama.”

There was one good, funny line in the movie–when Terrence Howard says, “If they can get the word, ‘homo,’ banned, we can get the word, ‘N—er,’ banned,” and then immediately turns to a friend and greets him with, “Hey, my N—er!” (Also funny: when the Black guys call the White boyfriend, “Robin Thicke.”) But it wasn’t worth sitting through this painful disaster for that. Not even close.

There was only one bright point in the movie: the stressing of faith in G-d and Christianity, which is embodied by the only decent, likable couple in the movie (the football player and his wife). But despite that, they utter a ton of F-words, along with the rest of the cast.

It’s always amazing to me that Black America gets exercised over perceived racism by White America, but, yet, has no problem whatsoever in rushing to the theaters to pay ten bucks-plus for these self-hating kinds of displays.

ONE MARX PLUS FOUR OBAMAS
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Watch the trailer . . .

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33 Responses

Victim gays and oversexed blacks – Hollywood’s modern idea of oppressed minorities – and authentic Americans to boot.

No one else apparently lives in America.

This weekend’s movies are completely skip-worthy. One wonders why they weren’t screened back in August. There’s no accounting for taste in Hollywood these days.

NormanF on November 15, 2013 at 8:11 pm

Well, at least fat chic de jour Melissa McCarthy wasn’t in either picture.

Jonathan E. Grant on November 15, 2013 at 8:37 pm

    Or for that matter, the onetime “hot” and always morbidly obese Gabourey Sidibe.

    ConcernedPatriot on November 16, 2013 at 4:11 am

    Yeah Jonathan it’s like they want to put her in every movie nowadays. It’s bad enough that her show “Mike and Molly” is back on TV. My better half likes that show but the only reason I tolerate it is because it has Gerald McRaney from “Simon and Simon”.

    Ken B on November 16, 2013 at 9:55 am

I don’t think I can watch McConaughey after I watched that putrid waste of a film “Killer Joe”. I like to laugh at Hollywood stars who think being edgy is acting cred when it actually means you’re being used by a pervert director. Especially actors who work for Nazi, pervert mental-case Lars von Trier. No one has told them the lunatic has escaped the asylum and is posing as a director. It’s kinda funny (in a sick way) when you think of it. Done in by pretension (and they don’t even know it).

I would think the film would have played the Nat King Cole version of The Christmas Song. I doubt Der Bingle is spinning in his grave only because he was a brutal bastard. So brutal, 2 of his kids committed suicide. He used to call one “Bucket Head” and make them wear their underwears on top of their heads. It might take a lot for that mean bastard to spin. It’s that time of year so we can all remember good, ole Der when he does his Christmas classic duet with David Bowie. I couldn’t agree more regarding state of Black cinema. Only ones spreading stereotypes are them.

And that Robin Thicke dig was nice!

Skunky on November 15, 2013 at 8:56 pm

    Leaves me to wonder if Nat King Cole’s estate said no to using his famous rendition of “The Christmas Song” in what Debbie aptly referred to in many words as a “modern day minstrel show” (I speak, of course, of Best Man Holiday[sic]). (And there are so many to choose from, among them the 1953 recording backed by Nelson Riddle which was issued and reissued on 45 for decades, and the 1961 version where the baton was led by Ralph Carmichael which is the most ubiquitous on the radio every Xmas season.)

    ConcernedPatriot on November 16, 2013 at 4:14 am

    Skunky,

    I didn’t know that about Crosby. Smooth voice but a mean heart. What kind of man makes his kids wear underwear on their heads. You’re right he’s not spinning in his grave he’s pointed face down. Yeah the Robin Thicke dig was funny. I think that he tries too hard to be hip but it comes across as phony. BTW love the new avatar.

    Ken B on November 16, 2013 at 9:35 am

I just wanted to applaud Skunky’s new avatar. You are very creative and artistic.

Alfredo from Puerto Rico on November 15, 2013 at 9:09 pm

    Thank you KenB (& Alfredo)!

    Yeah, Bing Crosby was a real house-devil. You know it when 2 of his poor kids killed themselves. I found out long ago and it’s all I think about when I hear or see him. And I agree Ken, that voice was so smooth but now I can never focus on it.

    People are strange, indeed.

    Skunky on November 16, 2013 at 9:51 am

      Yes Skunky, people ARE indeed strange. And I am noting again you seem to be finely tuned to various types of mental illness and dysfunctional situations. I went and read up on Bing, noted the son who wrote the “tell all” book, noted the story of the other son who smacked it all down, and thought about the two who killed themselves. I thought about it a lot. Very interesting stuff, because I’ve seen a lot of different families in my life, including my own and the dynamics of these situations.

      Let’s just say I am well aware of what level of denial can be achieved by people within families, including living their own microcosmic version of The Big Lie. It’s how societies are destroyed. By destroying the American family, the American left is able to succeed in giving people a New Age Centrism if you will.

      Looking at how dysfunctional families turn member after member out in to society at large, it’s no wonder America has failed. No more God centered lives, no more family centered lives, either. Just achieve “your center” at your friendly neighborhood federal office building.

      Alfredo from Puerto Rico on November 16, 2013 at 2:05 pm

“who looks more feminine and far less transvestitish than that female impersonator, Savannah Guthrie”

LOL!

DS_ROCKS! on November 15, 2013 at 9:59 pm

Debbie, you are right about the two films this weekend as skip worthy. You forgot to add a third type of film that Hollywood (black or white) give to black audiences and thats making heroes out of thugs.

Mario on November 15, 2013 at 10:00 pm

And then there’s the Rachel Maddow poster lurking in the background.

Little Al on November 16, 2013 at 8:05 am

Yesterday, I say Robert Redford’s new movie All Is Lost. Although Debbie liked it, I thought it couldn’t have been more boring. I expected great acting by Redford and a thrilling story of survival. It was neither. What it was was a waste of time and money.

Red Randy on November 16, 2013 at 8:30 am

    Oops, I mean, I SAW Robert Redford’s new movie…

    Red Randy on November 16, 2013 at 8:32 am

      Red Randy,

      To me Robert Redford is in the same mold as Susan Sarandon, Ed Asner, Morgan Freeman, and Dick Dreyfuss. Old Hollyweird actors who’ve let their politics shine through instead of acting. Their agents should tell them that most people who go see their movies don’t give a rat’s butt that they love all things liberal. Just shut up and act or better yet just STFU and go away.

      Ken B on November 16, 2013 at 10:35 am

Thanks again Debbie for taking the Hollyweird hits so that we don’t have to. I didn’t see “The Best Man” years ago and I don’t plan on seeing the latest yuckfest. Even though I like Morris Chesnut and Terrance Howard that is still not enough for me to waste my time. Also I can’t stand McConaua-gay so anything that he’s in just gets passed over. Red box here I come.

Ken B on November 16, 2013 at 9:29 am

Ken, there is nothing in All Is Lost. It’s an apt title.

Red Randy on November 16, 2013 at 3:31 pm

I agree with Debbie’s critique on Black Hollywood. I’ve been sitting here thinking when was the last “black” film I’ve watched, as I stated on another post, I refuse to watch any “slavery, the struggle, oh live in the past” bullshit, i’ve never watched a Madea film, I would guess, it was probably “Kings of Comedy” or something, which isn’t truly a film, huh?

The choices Hollywood gives, and the choices that black filmmakers make when when putting a screenplay together are weak, no substance and simple minded. I could see from the previews, it was the same oh bullshit. I don’t know when it happened but my mind cut this crap off a long time ago, and its funny thinking about it, I haven’t seen a film with an all black cast it seems to be a very very long time ago. Should I feel bad?

I would like nothing better for those writer and producers to just make some normal, non struggle film. Damn where is the vision?

Big D on November 16, 2013 at 5:42 pm

Interesting comments, BigD.

As far as the vision goes, let’s take the case of one DOpedup Winfield. She’s got quite a chip on her shoulder for someone whose claims of the horrible life she supposedly led as a youth cannot be substantiated, and who eventually became the richest woman in the world. Quite a chip on her shoulder for someone who benefited from what Dr. King and Co. went through, in order to pave the way for her. Quite a chip on her shoulder for someone who managed to bamboozle most of white America in to seeing her as some kind of Life Coach Goddess for their mundane lives.

And this is where the money is to fulfill the vision that BigD is seeking in African-American cinema. The money and the “vision” is in the hands of the people who want to keep beating people over the head for real AND imagined wrongs. She really was spewing the Bad America crap all over England this past week, I see.

I guess Black America really hasn’t advanced much since I was growing up in the 60’s, and the words “black” and “entrepreneur” couldn’t be found in the same magazine, let alone the same sentence. Yeah, fierce, bad, old, white, outmoded Eurocentric me. Silly me. Oh well, if ya can’t beat ‘em, . . .

KILL WHITEY!!! DEATH TO ALL HONKY MOFOS!!! POWER TO THE PEOPLE!!! DEATH TO THE WHITE DEVILS!!!

Gotta get in line, better Red than dead, I guess. I feel so much better now. Always good to vent.

Alfredo from Puerto Rico on November 16, 2013 at 7:42 pm

Hoo-boy you know what those rednecks are like, don’t you? Nothing like a little dose of HIV to knock some sense into those hill billy Texans.
So McConaughey finally decided to earn some credibility points by doing “Philadelphia” for the homophobic straight guy.
There’s nothing worse than being preached to in a movie by some Hollywood dunce with imagination deficit disorder.
Stereotypes explain to the stupid people why Obamacare is good for them and why they need to take their (HIV) medicine.
Barf

Frankz on November 17, 2013 at 7:32 am

“Imagination Deficit Disorder.”

BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHAHHAAHAAHHHHHHHHH!!!

It’s actually more real than most of the other “disorders” which have suddenly gotten names in the past quarter century.

Alfredo from Puerto Rico on November 17, 2013 at 11:54 am

    It’s most serious symptoms are the reruns :P (sorry)

    Frankz on November 17, 2013 at 12:46 pm

      Its* (yes i know)

      Frankz on November 17, 2013 at 12:48 pm

Right about Crosby. In Eddie Fisher’s book he said that Crosby really disrespected him when he was starting out. And Eddie said that Crosby was once his idol. Wow was Eddie really let down.

Fred on November 17, 2013 at 12:04 pm

I didn’t know about Bing Crosby’s family issues — behavior like that cannot be defended. I have admired Crosby through the years, however, because of his politics. He was always a staunch Republican. I don’t know if Debbie Reynolds would have been part of the Eddie Fisher fan club.

Little Al on November 17, 2013 at 3:05 pm

Since it has been established that in fact Nat King Cole’s version of “The Christmas Song” was featured in Best Man Holiday, and since I have no intention of seeing that flick (thanks for the warning), I wonder if those who have seen it could tell us whether it was the 1953 or 1961 recording that was used (the difference, besides who conducted the orchestra, was Cole’s voice which sounded slightly deeper, though he’d sung it in the same key as eight years before).

The other part: “Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire” didn’t become the song’s subtitle until about 1963. When Cole recorded all his versions of this now-classic, the full title had been “The Christmas Song (Merry Christmas To You).”

ConcernedPatriot on November 18, 2013 at 6:39 am

Interesting trivia: “The Christmas Song,” more commonly known as “Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire,” was written in 1945 by two Jews, Mel Torme (a great singer himself) and Robert Wells. That fact should not be a surprise, as many of the loved Christmas songs were written by Jews, including “White Christmas,” “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer,” “Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let it Snow,” etc. I mention this because it never ceases to amaze me how many things in American culture were created by Jews.

As with much other music connected with Christmas, “The Christmas Song” was not written around the time the holiday is celebrated (at that includes Handel masterpiece, “The Messiah”). Here’s the story of how the song came to be, as told by Mel Torme.

One excessively hot afternoon, I drove out to Bob’s house [Robert Wells] in Toluca Lake for a work session. The San Fernando Valley, always at least ten degrees warmer than the rest of the town, blistered in the July sun…. I opened the front door and walked in…. I called for Bob. No answer. I walked over to the piano. A writing pad rested on the music board. Written in pencil on the open page were four lines of verse:

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack frost nipping at your nose
Yuletide carols being sun by a choir
And folks dressed up like Eskimos.

When Bob finally appeared, I asked him about the little poem. He was dressed sensibly in tennis shorts and a white T-shirt, but he still looked uncomfortably warm.

“It was so damn hot today,” he said, “I thought I’d write something to cool myself off. All I could think of was Christmas and cold weather.”

I took another look at his handiwork. “You know,” I said, “this just might make a song.”

We sat down together at the piano, and, improbable though it may sound, “The Christmas Song” was completed about forty-five minutes later. Excitedly, we called Carlos Gastel, sped into Hollywood, played it for him, then for Johnny Burke, and then for Nat Cole, who fell in love with the tune. It took a full year for Nat to get into a studio to record it, but his record finally came out in the last fall of 1946; and the rest could be called our financial pleasure.

Ralph Adamo on November 18, 2013 at 3:26 pm

Saw “Enders War” with my son. It got the story basically right, but when i left the theatre i thought something was missing, so i went home and read the book. Actually alot was missing as so often happens when novels are adapted to the screen. Read the book and remember it was written back in the 80s, good SciFi.

Dave on November 19, 2013 at 12:44 pm

Just got around to seeing “Dallas Buyers Club” on the advice of a writer friend who told me it was well written and featured an extraordinary performance by Matt McConaughey.

I’ll have to agree with my writer friend and strongly disagree with this review characterizing this as a “leftist wet dream” and “anti-business.” The movie is neither. The backdrop story does show the FDA is in the pockets of big pharmaceutical companies and that they doctors go along with this program and profit from it as well, and it also shows that the FDA actually works AGAINST the health of Americans in many cases–when it goes against the profits of the power pharmaceutical companies.

This is what I suppose this article is calling “anti-business” with a “leftist” point of view. Well, I have news for you. There is nothing leftist or anti-business about this backdrop story–as the story is 100% true.

If anything, the movie treads very lightly on the FDA and the big pharmaceutical companies that deliberately LIE about the test results of their drugs, or how they rig them to ignore facts that go against approval of their drugs.

What I’m saying is well documented fact. http://www.ethics.harvard.edu/lab/blog/312-risky-drugs
There is a mountain of evidence demonstrating how the US Government and Big Pharma go hand-in-hand in a corrupt relationship that defrauds and picks the pockets of Americans, and even causes needless deaths. http://www.lef.org/magazine/mag2011/jun2011_The-FDA-Most-Heinous-Drug-Approval_01.htm

If you want to talk about anti-business, why don’t you discuss how the FDA and Big Pharma work to BLOCK the business of Food Supplement companies that in many cases offer much better and much cheaper solutions to improving health than harmful but “approved” pharmaceuticals. I guess those kind of anti-business tactics are just fine, right?

And as for the primary story involving a man that decides to fight the system to help improve the health of those infected with HIV, there is nothing leftist about that–unless you happen to like corrupt systems that are designed to harm, rather than help, individuals.

The script for this movie is very well written, and the character development is handled beautifully. I believe that this movie is so well written, in fact, that it does not matter what you think about homosexuals or even AIDs. This story could just as well been written about someone who contracted cancer. Of course, the fact that the subject is AIDS, not cancer, is integral to this particular story and the character development and changes, but the dynamics of the characters in the story are such that audiences can relate to them, regardless of their political positions.

Finally, Matt McConaughey has turned in an Oscar worthy performance, thoroughly immersing himself in his character– in appearance, the way he speaks and moves his body, and in his emotional development.

Ralph Adamo on February 17, 2014 at 3:32 am

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