February 17, 2011, - 3:57 pm

Achy Breaky Boo Hoo: No Tears for Billy Ray Cyrus, Pimp Dad

By Debbie Schlussel

I always laugh when Sean “Family Values” Hannity brags about “my good friend, Billy Ray Cyrus, a great American.”  The thing is, Cyrus was not much of a dad.  And he’s certainly not a great American.  Not even close.  But he was, indeed, a great show biz pimp.  Daddy Dearest Cyrus was, after all, the one who designed for daughter, Miley Cyrus, the stripper pole to which she gyrated a couple of years ago on a Nickelodeon kids awards show. It’s that stripper pole that prompted me to start calling the Hannah Montana alter ego, “Miley Virus.”


Hannah Montana Transforms Into Hannah Chlamydia

So, now, it’s a little disingenuous to hear Pimp, er . . . Pops Cyrus whine in an interview with GQ about a TV show ruining his daughter.  No, it wasn’t a TV show.  It was a father, or rather someone who should have been a father to his daughter, but saw her as a personal piggy bank–a meal-ticket.

The fact is that–while we often hear about show biz kids who turn into disasters as adults–there are many more who end up normal with their heads on their shoulders.  Every single Cosby kid did all right.  Mayim Bialik, from TV’s “Blossom,” and Kirk Cameron, from “Growing Pains,” are fine, too.  The same goes for “The Wonder Years” Fred Savage, who recently became a father (with his wife), and his co-star, Jason Hervey, who is a successful Hollywood producer.  And there are so many other examples.

It’s not about whether they were in TV shows and earned a lot of cash.  It’s about how they were raised and how their parents regulated and monitored their experiences in Hollywood.  In the case of Miley Cyrus, Billy Ray didn’t do much of that.  He readily admits in an interview that he was more of a friend to his daughter than a parent.  That was the problem here, not the cute TV show in which she acted.  In fact, he even used her show and its success to engineer a role for himself on it.  It’s tough to be a parent when you still want to be famous and your kid daughter has the power to decide if you can be on her show.


Billy Ray Cyrus Discovers Parenting a Little Late for Miley

And it’s especially schadenfreude-esque to hear Cyrus admit his daughter’s a disaster-in-development, after years of his warring attacks on parents who complained about Miley Cyrus’ growing slutty image and rising level of bad influence on their kids. He had no problem infecting millions of young girls, for whom he knew his daughter was an idol and role model, with the results of his malpracticed parenting.

I don’t know how much money father Cyrus still has from his one hit, “Achy Breaky Heart.”  But I doubt it was enough to finance the Cyrus family’s glam Hollywood life.  It appears that he and divorcing wife, Tish, instead, relied on their daughter’s fame and riches to fund the Lalaland lifestyle.

And when it became clear their daughter was growing up and her child character on TV wouldn’t last forever, the Cyrus sperm and womb donors had no problem farming their daughter out to more provocative roles and clothing (or lack thereof), in addition to the previously mentioned stripper pole.  But, as I pointed out, the Billy-Ray-designed Miley Cyrus ho act failed, and her last album bombed.

It’s not exactly a newsflash or rocket science that real parents parent, that they protect their kids, not pimp them out and tell them to gyrate on strippers polls on national TV.  How sad that Billy Ray Cyrus doesn’t yet quite comprehend that.  Even now, the Cyrus “dad” is using his daughter for publicity, as he sings his “TV Show Done Me Wrong” song–which rivals the rest of his non-hit country songs–to a popular men’s magazine, instead of a forum where it might actually be constructive, rather than attention-getting. I wouldn’t be surprised if this interview was spurred on less by a lesson learned about bad parenting and more by the possibility that millionairess Miley, now 18 and now a legal adult, has cut Pops off (or maybe put him on an allowance).

It’s probably too late to reclaim his eldest daughter and family from the trash.  And Billy Ray Cyrus’ fame-whoring and daughter-pimping is at the top of the garbage heap for why she’s such a slutty-acting, bong-hit-videos-on-YouTube mess.

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39 Responses

I tell my first cousin Lori that Miley Cyrus is a bad role model for her two young daughters.

Matthew on February 17, 2011 at 4:32 pm

    Real riveting column….slop like this won’t keep the “donations” coming in. And although Hannity is scum,,,sadly you are even lower then him. Give that to your federal agents you hate mongering self-hating ….well you know how pathetic you and your would be fans(for $5.00 a month that is)HAHAHAHA

    Bob K. on February 17, 2011 at 5:02 pm

      bob k nit-wit

      …another example of the results of rotten parenting…

      hill billy on February 17, 2011 at 5:48 pm

      For Bob K.

      Thank you for condescending those of us who cannot afford 60$ a year for one of our favorite sites. We will continue to give what we can financially, but more importantly, spread the word about Ms. Schlussel’s site.

      One can only imagine you walking past homeless people, throwing them a dime while spitting on them at the same time. Your disgust for those who have limited means are here for the whole world to see.

      While we may never know your real name or identity, you are burned with one heavy penalty for life – looking at yourself in the mirror every day and trying to justify what’s inside.

      You stay classy Bob and yes, Ms. Schlussel does have MANY fans. Not many are members of Mensa, polyglot, do pro-bono legal work (she in fact pays to work helping others), etc..

      Rest assured Bob – your attitude only strengthens our resolve and for that we thank you. She will continue to remain on our Conservative Websites for Freedom, and we will continue to give what we can.

      /Widow’s mite mean anything? Hint: (Mark 12:41-44, Luke 21:1-4)

      Jew Lover on February 17, 2011 at 7:13 pm

        For Bob K.

        One can only imagine you walking past homeless people, throwing them a dime while spitting on them at the same time. Your disgust for those who have limited means are here for the whole world to see.

        That’s as bizarre and tacky and unjustified and uncalled for as anything Mr. K. said about Ms. Schlussel.

        Miranda Rose Smith on February 20, 2011 at 5:54 am

I’m fortunate in that my 7 year daughter has taste—she hates iCarly and the like and prefers nature documentaries and SpongeBob.

Of course, raising her on Little House on the Prairie (the books, not the show) on our long road trips hasn’t hurt.

Occam's Tool on February 17, 2011 at 5:24 pm

    Of course, raising her on Little House on the Prairie (the books, not the show) on our long road trips hasn’t hurt.

    Occam’s Tool on February 17, 2011 at 5:24 pm


    Good for you. I loved those books when I was a child. Does anyone agree with me that Laura Ingalls Wilder should have won he Nobel Prize for Literature?

    Miranda Rose Smith on February 20, 2011 at 5:57 am

I couldn’t believe it when I heard this story. Amazing but true…Idiot dad.

samurai on February 17, 2011 at 6:05 pm

Bob K, this is a picture of you, since your trolling on this site and making a complete ass of yourself!


I know I haven’t done too much posting all day is because I’m a little sick and tired of the politics (I know you get tired of the politics Debbie til an extent).

“A nation is identified by it’s borders, language & culture!”

Sean R. on February 17, 2011 at 6:56 pm

Bob K is just the typical liberal arsehole who worships entertainers.

SOO: I had to remove most of Bob K a/k/a Bob Kell’s unhinged, inappropriate comments and ban him. DS

Son of Obama on February 17, 2011 at 8:01 pm

Billy is trying to set his daughter straight at this late point and time inorder to prepare her to become his future bride. Any so-called fathedr who would develope a stripper pole for his daughter could do no less.

Anthony on February 17, 2011 at 8:25 pm

Like I said Bob K, I have a picture of you on your computer with you foaming at both sides of your mouth, why don’t you stick to the topic or get lost for good, you leftist troll. BTW, here’s your pic Bob K:


“A nation is identified by it’s borders, language & culture!”

Sean R. on February 17, 2011 at 8:36 pm

Stripper poles aren’t slutty. Didn’t you hear, it’s the latest exercise craze, bought into by “smart” women who’d slap a lawsuit on you if you casually flirted with them, but swear bellying dancing isn’t degrading to women and has it’s roots in some magical ancient feminist tradition.

Fakey Breaky Heart on February 17, 2011 at 9:43 pm

Dear Debbie: Thank you for falling on the grenade that was her movie. Fortunately, I only go to G rated stuff with my kids, or stuff like Inglourious basterds with my friends. managed to avoid it. Thanks again for your sacrifice.

Occam's Tool on February 17, 2011 at 9:54 pm

I read the article you linked. Apparently Miley’s agents noted that she was smoking “the legal drug, salvia.” The artificial cannabinoids can cause psychosis worse than MJ itself. They are NOT preferrable.

Occam's Tool on February 17, 2011 at 9:57 pm

I read the article and enjoyed it only in the sense of I was waiting for this fool to admit his pimping of his daughter, Viley Virus had indeed destroyed his family.

His dopey wife carried on an affair with long-timed scuzzball Bret Michaels…which is the equivalent of licking a dirty, old petri-dish with some old STD in it.

The whole family has gone down the crapper. No matter how much Viley Virus insisted she was such a puuuuuure young lady, one could tell by her archetype that she was anything but. Her Mum having an affair with the World’s Champion of the World’s most disrespectful user of skanks EVERYWHERE (that wig-wearing fool)…Bret Michaels, tells me she had NOT a clue.

On top of that, Foolish Billy-Ray blames David Lynch for part of the problem! What a joke. I am a fan of DL and love “Mulholland Drive…and liked BRC’s cameo, but he and his cheating wife have NO ONE to blame but themselves.

Never was a hater of BRC (or a fan) but really, someone who at once had his taste of fame should have known how this story would end.

Will Smith and his wife pimp out their kids too. It’s like they can’t stand their immediate family NOT being famous.

Skunky on February 17, 2011 at 10:07 pm

I had my fill of those two after that picture Annie L. did for Vanity Fair, too weird.

Jo on February 17, 2011 at 10:39 pm

When I heard this I thought, #1) the TV show didn’t ruin your family, your inability to be the head, and leader of your family did, #2) Where did you think you were gonna hang out…Disneyland, association is everything, and #3) you still haven’t learned a thing, you are blaming others and not yourself.

Daphne on February 17, 2011 at 10:43 pm

Some astute observations disguised as vituperative bloviations…

1) Any live action show that Disney puts out these days is certified dreck;

2) I know my drugs. Whatever Miley was tripping out on in the infamous bong video was not salivia. Hint: it rhymes with CASH;

3) I hated Achy Breaky Heart when it first came out. I strill can’t stand it. And if you were to go to any Filipino wedding, you might see some line dancing. Thank you Billy Ray for helping to destroy Tagalog culture;

4) “It’s probably too late to reclaim his eldest daughter and family from the trash.” No offence, Ma’am, but Billy Bob’s point of no return was when Miley started “Hannah Montana”. Any redeeming qualities in that show? I don’t know but it sure kept the pedophiles off the street for 30 minutes;

5) Bob KKK – go back to stormfront.org and masturbate to Prussian Blue. Ingezüchteten Faschisten raus!

6) If tween diva were to trumpet non-stop about being drug free, saving herself for marriage and enjoying being a role model for girls everywhere, RUN! IT’S A LIE!

7) Have I mentioned that Disney is a lie? Agree or disagree. Discuss. Then watch something more wholesome and sincere. Like HBO.

8) There ain’t too much snow in Tennessee. That’s why Billy Ray went Hollywood. Yeah… that’s it!

And now I’m done. The end.

Dieser Blog tötet Faschisten tot! Google Translate this!

The Reverend Jacques on February 18, 2011 at 12:26 am

Sorry Debs, but I must vehemently disagree with you about the relative “normalcy” of Kirk Cameron. That boy ain’t right in the head. I’m sure that by this time, you have seen this extremely popular YouTube posting:


In a way, the fact that he didn’t get involved with this sort of nonsense as a result of a drug problem (like say, Willie Aames, Stephen Baldwin or Gary Busey) makes him even weirder. He just woke up one day and decided to start hanging out with a guy who babbles like this, completely of his own volition…and for no apparent reason. And I repeat: “That boy ain’t right in the head!”

Irving on February 18, 2011 at 2:14 am

Miley Cyrus is virtually a younger version of Britney Spears, and nothing more. I suspect that Billy Ray is more upset about no longer having a daughter young enough to be a gravy train for him. Miley if following in the footsteps of so many other child/teen stars before her. One of the few child stars that I ever had sympathy for was Haley Mills. She was and exceptionally talented young actress who could have transitioned into adult roles, but her early marriage to a much older man(decades older)and subsequent motherhood destroyed that opportunity for her. At least Haley can show some legitimate work done in her past, unlike Britney Spears or Miley Cyrus.

worry01 on February 18, 2011 at 2:36 am

Hey she’s legal now…I would bang that little tart…slam that bootie like a rubber fck doll…

Chester on February 18, 2011 at 10:54 am


    delete chester

    flag him (unemployed)

    F22 on February 18, 2011 at 12:09 pm


So, bashing Kirk Cameron for being a Christian? Way to stay tolerant, fella. Know any good anti-Semitic jokes while you are at it? You’d be a huge hit in the Egyptian nightclubs right about now if you do.

Gerald on February 18, 2011 at 12:24 pm

    No, I am not bashing him for being him for being a Christian, I am bashing him for being a nutcase. There are Christians who conduct themselves with a modicum of dignity and decorum. Then there are others like Cameron and that Ray Comfort (what a ridiculous made-up name) idiot he hangs out with, who enjoy spending their weekends hanging out at piers here in southern California, screaming and pointing at people:


    Irving on February 18, 2011 at 1:07 pm


Christians have been street preaching and otherwise conducting themselves “foolishly” since the religion began, when it was an illegal sect that the Roman Empire tried to stamp out by burning them at the stake and throwing them to the lions by the millions (see Emperor Decius). Christianity got away from “acting foolishly” in favor of dignified, civilized behavior only when and because Christianity became the state religion of the Roman Empire – and elsewhere – and as a result, street preaching and other forms of evangelism became unnecessary, as people were initiated into the state church by birth, and in most instances it was compulsory (one had no choice). So, street preaching and other forms of evangelism dwindled. Result: when the state churches – and the cultures based on them – crumbled, so did most of the Christians. Look at Europe: some of its countries have gone from over 80% Christian (officially anyway) to less than 2% Christian in less than 150 years.

So, the Christians “who conduct themselves with decency and decorum” are the ones who tend to die out within a generation or two (because of failing to reproduce their numbers) and wind up getting replaced by secular humanists and Muslims. And I suppose that you believe that things are SO MUCH BETTER FOR EVERYONE when the secular humanists and Muslims are in control?

Gerald on February 18, 2011 at 1:19 pm

I believe that in show business the move from virgin to whore is pre-ordained and just looks like a career shift to those who make money off of performers.

Beyonce has done this careful dance, even making up “Sasha Fierce” to justify her slutty stuff. I was surprised that she was able to work the “choir girl at home, ho on the stage” gambit for as long as she did, but it worked for Brooke Shields back in the 1980s, so why not for Miss Beyonce and all the other little girls.

OmAnonymous on February 18, 2011 at 1:50 pm

Hannah Montana a “cute show”? With all due respect, whatever was so cute about parading a preteen (Cyrus was 12 when she was cast in the role) around in skin-tight clothes, streetwalker hair and makeup, having her perform suggestive (to be mild) gyrating “dance choreography” that was considered vulgar, racy and controversial when ADULT WOMEN like Madonna, Paula Abdul and Janet Jackson first started doing it 20 years ago, and plotlines that were basically slightly sanitized versions of shows that depicted single ADULT women from the 80s and 90s (dating, love triangles, cheating, backstabbing, deception, betrayal, catty rivalries etc.) “Hannah Montana” and all of the other tween/teen skank shows and acts that Disney has been putting out since at least Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera isn’t THAT MUCH DIFFERENT from the stripper pole “Miley Virus” stuff, and that Disney has been able to get away with peddling teen girl flesh (and not only to teen boys, but to grown men) without anyone calling them on it (or at least anyone but Megan Fox, of all people) is amazing. Let your kid watch “Hannah Montana” and the other tween/teen sitcom junk on Disney, and they’ll be ready, ripe and conditioned to graduate to “Jersey Shore” and “Skins” on MTV.

Though Billy Ray Cyrus did certainly financially benefit from “Hannah Montana”, it isn’t technically true that the elder Cyrus used his daughter as a meal ticket, as Cyrus did leave a hit show on PaxNet that he could have continued for as long as he wanted to keep doing it (and was using the “faith and family” cred from that show to build a CCM music career) in order to join his daughter on “Hannah Montana.” (Also, according to the “official line”, the show wasn’t developed for Miley, but was adapted to fit her according to her father’s demands after she landed the part.) Still, he did consent to her being on that show knowing full well that Disney was going to make her a teeny bopper sex object, and also knowing that the Disney teeny bopper sex objects attempt to make the transition to grown up sex object just as did Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Lindsay Lohan, and a bunch of others who weren’t nearly as successful (though not for lack of trying).

My theory: Billy Ray Cyrus knows that Miley Cyrus can’t make the transition to grown-up star (because truth be told, she is neither particularly talented or good looking) but is just going to keep trying, and make quite the spectacle of herself in the process (in addition to living the Hollywood party lifestyle, which in spite of what Billy Ray Cyrus would have you believe and their “faith and family friendly” image, Miley has been pursuing for some time now). So, the elder Cyrus is just trying to distance himself from his daughter’s future antics in order to save his own reputation with the folks that may want to buy one of his country or gospel albums down the line. (Yes, having Sean Hannity around to publicize and endorse Billy Ray’s future projects will help with that consumer demographic, sadly.)

It’s slimy and sleazy, but it’s Hollywood, including most of the folks who claim to represent “family values.” The idea that Nashville is so morally superior to Hollywood was one of the biggest con jobs that the country music industry pulled on its fans.

Gerald on February 18, 2011 at 2:32 pm

To paraphrase “ it Is better to tie a grind stone around your neck and jump into a river than to lead children to sin”
Achy breaky ain’t half of it!

Halethorpe Joe on February 18, 2011 at 3:04 pm

To paraphrase “ it Is better to tie a grind stone around your neck and jump into a river than to lead children to sin”
Achy breaky ain’t half of it!

Halethorpe Joe on February 18, 2011 at 3:06 pm

Hannity would call anyone who didn’t burn old glory in front of him a “Great American”. F’ing punk ass chump.

spiffo on February 18, 2011 at 3:36 pm

Papa Miley is not too bright in case youve never heard him speak.
He knew, just like you said, that little Miley was a gravy train.

haley on February 18, 2011 at 9:29 pm

A teeny bopper sex object? I think only in her recent concerts. But in the more private backstage and post production party antics I think she is playing it up. She will be partying for a couple of years. Her name will remain in the tabloids instead of on the theater marquis. She is of age now so I can comment.

Jake49 on February 21, 2011 at 4:30 pm

I wanna know how any times Billy Ray has crammed his Viagra-laced 4 inch pinky-pecker up his own daughters’ mud tube. That’s right. I said “daughters’ ” with the apostrophe on the outside to mean the plural. Noah is now a little over 11 years old and you KNOW he’s gotten a piece of that already. After Noah’s carted away to the Amy Winehouse Home of Forgotten Drug Skanks, it will be very interesting to see what happens of him.

JonnyG on May 14, 2011 at 1:22 am

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