March 13, 2012, - 7:25 pm
If you’re one of those weird sickos who has a strange fetish for naked pregnant women, this post isn’t for you. Report to your nearest loony bin. But for everybody else, I hope you agree with me that this “look at me naked and pregnant” craze must go. First, it was Demi Moore years ago, when she hadn’t yet moved on to marrying her son. Then, it was fellow skanks Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera. Then, it was Mariah Carey and Nia Long, ‘cuz you know that in the age of civil rights and equality the Black chicks gotta get in on the stupidity. And now it’s Jessica Simpson. And she’s not just posing pregnant and nude on the cover of the latest issue of Elle magazine. She’s also shown again in underpants with her babydaddy kissing her stomach. Uggh. Yet another thing to file under the TMI category. Too. Much. Information.
Is there a reason we need to see this naked pregnant chick? I mean, is there a reason beyond . . . look at me, look at me, look at me? Nope. Tonight, her new fashion competition reality show debuts on NBC, and I understand the need for attention and attention-seeking stunts to drive ratings her way. But it says a lot if posing naked and pregnant on a magazine cover is the only way you can get it. Sad. As I’ve said repeatedly on this site, there is sadly no such thing as privacy anymore in our Twitter/Facebook/look-at-me/notice-me/make-me-famous-and-if-I’m-famous-do-anything-to-get-attention-and-keep-me-famous culture.
In any event, the naked pregnant celebrity pose is something that’s gotta go. I wouldn’t wanna see the pregnant transsexual man naked and pregnant on a magazine cover, and I don’t wanna see Jessica Simpson on the cover either. Keep something to yourself. (You just know that kid is gonna be a spoiled, troubled disaster. . . in addition to being born out of wedlock to a kept man and a sugarmommy mother.)
It’s a never-ending trend about which I gotta scream . . . PLEASE. MAKE. IT. STOP. Yuck!
Her line of shoes (which someone else designs and on which she slaps her name) is cool. And she (or, more likely, the people who design the stuff bearing her name) is pretty good at spotting trends.
But as for her latest trend, put some clothes on. We don’t wanna see it.