September 26, 2013, - 12:00 pm
Along with wanting the world to know that she has lots of sex and does lots of drugs, skanky Miley Cyrus a/k/a Miley Virus also wants you to know that she’s “down wit da struggle.” She told Rolling Stone that she “grew up” when she was in Detroit one recent summer. But as with many other White celebrity phonies who want you to know how streetwise, gangsta, and Black they are, it’s all a bunch of baloney. (Kid Rock a/k/a Bob Ritchie is another such example. He used to brag that he’s “here to represent trailer parks” but he never lived in one his life. He grew up in his multi-millionaire car dealer father’s mansion.)
Cyrus’ Detroit “gangsta bonhomie” is bunk. Cyrus was never “in Detroit,” though she might have passed through the city while in a car. In fact, she filmed a schlocky straight-to-video movie, “LOL”–subsidized with gazillions in absurd Michigan tax credits and rebates–with Demi Moore in one of Michigan’s swankiest cities, Grosse Pointe, home to the gargantuan waterside mansions of many a Ford family scion And, then, Cyrus and then-boyfriend Liam Hemsworth lived in a rented mansion in one of Michigan’s other swankiest zip codes, Orchard Lake, Michigan, home to the mansions of billionaires like Compuware founder Peter Karmanos. Cyrus and Hemsworth were photographed in swimsuits on the Orchard Lake and rode on someone’s yacht. Uh-huh, that’s really gangsta, isn’t it?
In her four-letter word filled Rolling Stone interview, which she did while getting a “Rolling $tone” tattoo on the bottoms of her feet at a seedy Los Angeles tattoo parlor, Cyrus said:
Miley’s transformation from America’s sweetheart into whatever the hell she is now kicked into high gear three years ago, when she went to Detroit to shoot a movie called LOL. “Detroit’s where I felt like I really grew up,” she says. “It was only for a summer, but that’s where I started going to clubs, where I got my first tattoo. Well, not my first tattoo, but my first without my mom’s consent. I got it on 8 Mile! I lied to the guy and told him I was 18. I got a heart on my finger and wore a Band-Aid for two months so my mom wouldn’t find out.” She also bonded with her co-star, Demi Moore, whose rocky relationship with Ashton Kutcher was becoming a major tabloid story. “That was dope, because I think we needed each other at that point,” Miley says. “We both needed to get out of L.A.”
Hmmm . . . however messed up Demi Moore is, something tells me she didn’t exactly confide in the 17-year-old former Hannah Montana who slings around passe urban slang like “dope” desperately trying to sound Black. And as for the “clubs” Cyrus went to when she was in town, the Detroit newspapers and Twitter had regular reports of her hang-outs. It wasn’t tattoo parlors on Eight Mile and clubs. The most “dope” thing she did was a duo with Moore at a Garden City (another Detroit suburb) karaoke bar.
With Cyrus’ sleazy performance at the MTV Video Music Awards, her naked videos, topless shots on the cover of Rolling Stone, and nearly naked outfits at recent performances (she wore pasties and little else recently), Cyrus is deliberately working the public and the pop culture media and laughing all the way to the bank at the suckers that dominate millennial consumerhood. But it’s all a cold, calculated act which she tells Rolling Stone she’s been planning since age 15.
Miley has been planting the seeds for her big transition to adulthood for the past five years. She was 15 when she weathered her first scandal, when she posed for Vanity Fair wearing a sheet that made her look topless. (“I feel so embarrassed,” she said in a statement. “And I apologize to my fans, who I care so deeply about.”)
Puh-leeze. She wasn’t embarrassed. She was just embarrassed that America didn’t fall for her slut act at age 15. But, no worries, they did fall for it now at age 20.
Sadly, our culture is so vapid that any other 15-year-old American girl would do the same thing to attain her fame and fortune.
Including the phony gangsta act. The only thing more annoying is her belief that we want to see her tongue ad nauseam. We don’t.
Don’t forget she was raised and did this all with the blessing of dear old dad, Billy Ray Cyrus, whom Sean Hannity keeps telling us is “a great American.”
Cyrus’ birth name was Hope Cyrus. But her sperm and womb donor, Billy Ray and Tish, for whom she’s served forever as a meal ticket, allowed her to legally change her first name to Miley.
Spot on, since there’s no hope there.
One other thing: looking at the Miley Cyrus Rolling Stone cover, you have to laugh at the headline, “The War on Gay Teens.” Looking at the cover photo, it’s hard to tell which you are looking at, Cyrus or a gay teen. Just sayin’.
Tags: Demi Moore, Detroit, LOL, Miley Cyrus, Miley Cyrus Detroit, Miley Cyrus gangsta, Miley Cyrus thinks she's Black, Miley Cyrus' phony gangsta act, Miley Virus