January 3, 2006, - 12:27 pm
By Debbie Schlussel
With a combination flu/cold/strep throat illness for the last five days, I was too ill to post much and am, therefore, late in posting my list of best/worst movies of 2005. But, as they say, better late than never (and if not now, when?).
So, here goes . . . .
Best/Worst Movies of 2005
1) “The Great Raid“–What our brave soldiers went through in order to beat evil in WWII. Must see for all those who waiver in having our country make similar sacrifices to fight the Nazism of today, Islamo-fascism.
2) “Cinderella Man“–Great triumph of old fashioned grit and will in boxing; a parable for non-sports.
3) “Chronicles of Narnia“–Wonderful, mythical fairy tale that is said to be symbolic of Christianity.
(CAN’T come up with more than three great movies for the year. Says a lot about Hollywood’s “offerings.”)
1) “Munich“–fraudulent film based on a fraudulent book based on a fraudulent Mossad agent (who was really an El Al airline screener); says we should not fight terrorism and just roll over and die. Moral equivalence extraordinaire. Lowlight: Murder of innocent Israeli athletes moronically interspersed with sex scene of metrosexual Mossad agent. Sick.
2) “The War Within“/”Paradise Now” (tie)–Two movies that blame us and the Israelis for terror, make terrorists the nice guys. But big problem: We never tortured the 9/11 hijackers, so premise of War Within is fallacious.
3) “Domino“–sickening violence, stupid plot, two plus wasted hours of life that makes you ask “Why?” Among the most disturbing, gratuitously violent movies I’ve seen.
4) “The Constant Gardener“–Cross between far-leftist and Farrakhan-esque drivel, the plot of this “film” says: Western White men, pharmaceutical companies–evil, vicious, AIDS virus implanters/spreaders; Black Africans–nice, pure, innocent, peaceful. Long and boring as all get out.
5) “The Interpreter“/”Flight Plan“/”Kingdom of Heaven“–Revisionist fantasy movies that tell us that Muslims are not the terrorists, Black Africans with AIDS from fictional Mobutu or Federal Air Marshals and flight attendants are; and that Saladdin was a nice, loving, peaceful guy during the Crusades, that it’s all the Christians’ fault that we have terrorism, etc. Plus, added minus: “Interpreter” stars Jeff Spicoli a/k/a Sean Penn.
6) “Dukes of Hazzard“–Jessica Simpson plus yet another remake equals two plus hours of stupid.
7) “Memoirs of a Geisha“–“Memoirs of a Whore in a Kimono“. Don’t know why the usually right-on Don Feder of FrontPageMag.com said this movie is “not about sex,” when that’s all it’s about (and why he absurdly named it among the top ten movies of the year; huh?). Movie version of Donna Summer’s “Bad Girls” if taking place in pre-WWII Japan.
8) “Nine Lives“–dysfunctional, sick, bizarre set of chick-flick vignettes is just plain awful.
Tags: airline screener, Bad Girls, Black Africans, boxing, Constant Gardener, Domino, Dukes of Hazzard, I, Interpreter, Japan, Jeff Spicoli, Jessica Simpson, Kingdom of Heaven, Mossad, Munich, non-sports, Paradise Now, pharmaceutical, The Constant Gardener, The Great Raid, The Interpreter, The War Within, throat illness